Are Buddhist parents popular in 2017? If you want to be lazy, just say so!

In this slightly anxious era, \”Buddhism\” is like a clear stream washing everyone\’s \”heart\” – don\’t be impatient, wait for the flowers to bloom. The circle of friends has also been drowned out by this kind of \”Buddhist\” voice. The sky is full of Buddhist parenting sutras. Apart from being peaceful, there is also a sense of not being happy with things and not being sad with oneself. It was as if suddenly everyone became a Buddha. The child was playing in the sand and curiously took a bite? It doesn\’t matter, I won\’t eat it next time. Do children like to dismantle electrical appliances? Take it apart, but only old appliances. Did your child not finish their homework? It\’s okay, I\’ve tried my best. …but what is true Buddhist parenting? But no one can tell why. Some people are happy and some are worried about Buddhist parenting. Parents are obviously divided into two groups. Opposition VS supporter, both of them are equally committed to their parenting concepts. Regarding eating objections: Many mothers have experienced rapid improvement in their cooking skills since becoming mothers. From the original they could only cook scrambled eggs with tomatoes, to now they are proficient in both Chinese and Western food. Three hundred and sixty-five days a year, I can\’t wait to do something new for my children every day. My cousin can only give her a thumbs up silently. To be honest, for the nutrition of the child, such a mother is really excellent. Supporters: It’s also about eating. According to the concept of Buddhist parenting, a lot of money can be saved: children only need complementary food for a few months, rice noodles are meaningless; food supplement machines are even more expensive; eating by yourself Just chop something into pieces and give it to the child; definitely don’t buy snacks. If he’s hungry, give him half a banana or a steamed soft carrot. Picky about food? Haha, then there is nothing to eat. Regarding the opposition to wearing clothes: I have been pursuing famous brands for my children since they were young, and I have to buy fancy clothes for my children even if I don’t have the conditions to do so. In their words, children go out to show off their appearance. If other people’s children can wear it, so can my children! Supporters: As long as the clothes are enough to wear, it is fine if others cannot wear them. My children can also wear them. It is not so particular about clothes, as long as the clothes are clean. Regarding the opposition to learning: It is no exaggeration to say that 99% of children now have extracurricular tutoring classes. Whether they like it or not, as long as parents think it is good, they will spend money to let their children go to school. In order for the children to go to the best schools, they have to buy a house in the school district even though they are trying to sell everything. In short, children’s education comes first. Supporters: Respect children\’s hobbies, do not force or force, children can learn if they want to, and stop if they don\’t want to. There are several screenshots in the circle of friends. It is said that in the class group, many parents reported that their children\’s homework has been completed, but a father with a Buddhist parenting style sang the opposite. Not only did he send a private message to the teacher, \”The child has tried his best.\” He even sent photos of his children playing during the holidays. The teacher had to come out and announce the group rules: \”You are not allowed to post content that has nothing to do with learning!\” About playing the opposition: The world is so big, I have to take my children to see it as soon as possible to let them broaden their horizons. Supporters: Play wherever you go. Temporary playgrounds at home and nearby parks are all independent play spaces for children, saving time, effort and money. Concluding remarks Opposition: What children will face in the future is a society of \”the weak and the strong\”, such asIf we let him go now and let him grow freely, then half of his talents will be learned, half of his homework will be written, and the whole person will be like a bottle full of water. So what will your children do to compete with others in the future? Can such young people shoulder the responsibility of society? Can you take care of your family? Supporters: Under the current education system, children\’s academic burden is already heavy. If parents put pressure on their children, the pressure on the children can be imagined. When he grew up and recalled that his childhood was all about homework and tutoring classes, it was too late to regret it at that time. In short, the father-in-law is right and the mother-in-law is right. After hearing this, I even felt a little hesitant. How should I educate my children correctly? What my cousin wants to say is that you don’t have to worry too much about which kind of parenting experience is better. The most important thing is to choose the one that suits your child’s characteristics. How to practice \”Buddhist parenting\” correctly? The currently popular \”Buddhist parenting\” actually emphasizes a way of facing the growth of children without being anxious or impatient, and with a peaceful attitude. When it comes to parents, it is definitely not possible to just let things go. Waiting for the flowers to bloom does not put pressure on your children; if you want them to bloom, you still need to water and fertilize them. But for today\’s parents, the biggest problem is not that they don\’t want to take care of things, but that they take too much care. We worry about whether our children are physically healthy, we worry about whether our children are making academic progress, we worry about whether our children are psychologically happy, and we worry about whether our children can keep up with society… Here, I would like to give you two suggestions: 1. Distinguish what is controllable The desire for control is one of the most primitive desires of human beings. Since infancy, we have been eager to pursue a sense of control. We are happy to control our own body movements, and we are happy to be able to control the switches of toys. After growing up, this desire for control becomes stronger and stronger, gradually shifting from controlling oneself to expecting to control others, the environment, and even the future. So we often feel that as long as we do certain things and do them right, things should develop in the direction we expect (similar to the saying \”where there is a will, there is a way\”). In fact, the growth process of children is full of too many surprises and coincidences, such as the child\’s cooperation, personality, preferences, emotions, and even timing and communication methods. Such accidents and accidents may bring disappointment and frustration, or they may bring happiness and surprise. So we must face the reality: children will not grow up exactly according to our expectations, and all of this is beyond our control. So, don’t always try to control your children, what we have to do is control what we can do. 2. Be yourself, and don’t pass on the things you haven’t done well to your children. From a few months old, the children will learn to speak with their parents, and when they are about one year old, they will start toddling. The words and deeds of their parents will affect the whole family. The atmosphere directly affects the children subtly. For example, when his son learned to smoke, his father was so angry that he held his son down and beat him. At the end of the fight, the father asked his son to quit smoking, and the son responded with one sentence: \”What a big deal, my mother asked you to quit smoking every day and you didn\’t quit, why do you blame me!\” Obviously, he smokes and drinks, but asks his child to quit smoking. Develop good living habits. As a parent, what confidence do you have to ask your children to do this? PlaceIt can be said that there is a kind of moral kidnapping in this world, which is called: I do everything for your own good, but I just don’t want to set an example. Sanmao once said: \”Most Chinese parents regard their children as their lifeblood and the extension and continuation of their own lives. They hope that their unfinished ideals and glory in their lives can be realized in their children.\” So, A child often carries the hopes of two people, or even the hopes of the whole family. How can he be happy like that? What about realizing your own value? Therefore, teaching children only requires teaching them how to behave. This is fundamental. As for whether it will work out in the future, just leave it to chance.