As a parent, who doesn’t have to give and be rejected at the same time?

When Mei heard that I was back, she invited me to her house and said she hadn\’t seen her for a long time. So I took a taxi to Mei\’s house. The moment I saw Mei, I felt that Mei had lost weight. \”Where\’s the grandson?\” I asked. \”My grandson went to grandma\’s house.\” Mei said. \”Then you can have a good rest and relax.\” \”My daughter-in-law took her away, and my son thought I didn\’t take care of her well. Do you think grandma can abuse her grandson? It\’s not easy to take care of children nowadays. It\’s no longer the same as when we were children.\” , Not to mention the great responsibility, it is still thankless for your efforts.\” Mei\’s tone was obviously dissatisfied. It turns out that after Mei\’s grandson was born, her daughter-in-law took care of it herself. The daughter-in-law takes care of the child very carefully. After bathing the child every day, she gently massages the child\’s front and back before getting dressed. The little guy enjoyed his mother\’s massage very much and became fat and healthy. When the child was one and a half years old and weaned, the daughter-in-law had to go to work, so the son sent the child to Mei to take care of her. Mei said: I don’t know how to massage, but I take care of myself very carefully. Who would have known that within a few days of my child\’s arrival, he fell ill and had a fever, which made it impossible for me to close my eyes all night long. The child lost weight, but my wife didn’t say anything. My son blamed me for not taking it properly and said the clothes he wore were so ugly. He yelled at me on the video phone. If it weren\’t for the sake of my little grandson, I would have given up on it a long time ago. He doesn’t even know how he grew up. He has the ability to take care of himself, so why leave it to me? Mei became more and more excited as she talked. I pictured in my mind: How to massage such a small child… It is really not that easy to be a grandma nowadays. The main reason why parents are criticized for their efforts at the same time is that the two generations have different concepts of running a household, raising children, and educating children, which can easily lead to disputes. But there is no right or wrong in all concepts. People who agree with it think it is right, and people who deny it think it is wrong. It all depends on their own cognition. Qianyi, a boy, is in the middle class of kindergarten this year. He lives with his grandma and grandpa at night. During the day, it is his grandma and grandpa who are responsible for picking him up and dropping him off at the kindergarten. In grandma\’s eyes, Qianyi is good at everything, but he doesn\’t care about hygiene. After returning home from kindergarten, Qianyi could lie down wherever he wanted. Except for dangerous items, no one restricted him from playing with whatever he wanted. However, as long as Qianyi goes out with grandma and grandpa, most of the things outside will be considered \”dirty\” by grandma and grandpa and will not be touched. But Qianyi is very interested in everything and wants to touch and take a look at everything she sees. Qianyi\’s mother doesn\’t think there\’s anything wrong with her. She thinks it\’s a good thing and normal for her children to be curious. Qianyi’s mother said: Children are curious, which is a kind of training for language development: when children are playing, they will mutter words to toys from time to time. Don’t underestimate this communication mode, it gives children the opportunity to use language to express. Adults can play with children, which not only can induce them to talk more, but can also guide their vocabulary and expression skills to strengthen their ability to master language. Curiosity can encourage children to use their senses to contact the world, while stimulating their vision, hearing and touch, and helping them to cooperate with the reactions of various senses in their bodies to contact and recognize novel things in the outside world. Grandma and grandpa are unwilling to listen to the \”teachings\” of Qianyi\’s mother, and blame the mother for not caring about her children and for indulging them. For Qianyi’s problem of “not being hygienic”,Mother and daughter quarrel a lot. When the quarrel got annoying, Qianyi’s mother said: You two can go on a trip or go square dancing if you have nothing to do. Don’t keep nagging all day long. It will also make me very tired and annoyed. Mother and daughter broke up unhappy. Lu Xun said: \”When I am silent, I feel very fulfilled. When I speak, I feel empty.\” Parents and children often do not talk because of different concepts. And because they didn’t communicate well and spoke casually, many times they inadvertently hurt feelings. Many times, when parents are rejected by their children, like children who have done something wrong, they can only cry secretly and use tears to soothe their sad mood; sometimes they hate themselves for being incompetent and failing to teach well, making their children ungrateful. I have read two stories. In the United States, two families have produced children for eight generations. The ancestor of a family was the famous and respected philosopher Ganace Edward in Connecticut 200 years ago. Because he valued the education of his children and passed it on from generation to generation, his eight generations of descendants produced a vice president, a diplomat, 13 university deans, 103 university professors, 60 doctors, and more than 20 congressmen. For two centuries, no one committed a crime. The ancestor of another family was Max Lake of New York State in 200. He was a notorious gambler and drunkard who opened a gambling den and was indifferent to the education of his children. Among their eight generations of descendants, there were 7 murderers, 65 thieves, 324 beggars, and more than 400 people died young or became disabled due to binge drinking. Tolstoy said: \”All education, or nine hundred and ninety-nine percent of education, comes down to role models and the integrity and perfection of the parents\’ own lives.\” The eight-generation family history of these two families tells the story Our family is the first \”school\” for our children, and parents are their children\’s first \”teachers.\” Traditional Chinese family education and family environment are directly related to the formation of children\’s moral character and outlook on life. The final result is: parents are willing to give, and children happily accept it. Mrs. Stena put it very clearly: children are the shadow of their parents. In order to cultivate children\’s moral character, parents should be cautious in their behavior and set an example for their children at all times. Children\’s good or bad behavior is the result of the influence of parents\’ education. As a parent, even if you are willing to give, you must let your children know how to be grateful, how to cherish, and how to respect. How can we do better? 1. Parents should actively learn new knowledge. As parents, they should actively learn new knowledge and try their best to raise and educate their grandchildren with modern scientific knowledge. Especially when it comes to the concept of raising grandchildren, parents must keep up with the times and communicate with their children frequently. Parents who actively learn new knowledge can maintain their own vitality, stay youthful, and improve themselves. At the same time, they can be of the same mind as their children and will not be abandoned by the times. 2. Don’t spoil your grandchildren. As parents, you should control your emotions with reason and distinguish the boundaries between love and spoiling. Correct love is conducive to the healthy growth of grandchildren. \”Filial piety comes first among all good deeds.\” In life, parents\’ words and deeds set an example for their children of respecting the elderly and loving the young at all times. From the little things, cultivate children\’s gratitude and humility. Guide children to learn to be independent,Don\’t indulge or indulge. Don’t let your children feel that their status in the family is superior to others, don’t blindly protect your children when they make mistakes, don’t satisfy your children easily, give your children whatever they want, and don’t do everything for your children. 3. Understand and respect the hard work of parents. Children must first have a correct attitude. No matter how busy they are, they must take time to be with their children. Do not completely hand over the education and custody of their children to their parents and become a hands-off shopkeeper. Even if you are a parent after giving birth to a child, your children should study more and pay more attention to parent-child communication. This is the responsible approach to your children. 4. Inspire children to be filial. Young parents should inspire their children to be filial, know how to take care of the elderly, and cultivate their children\’s sense of responsibility from an early age. Reverse caring and being cared for, and the relationship will change. Once a child finds someone he cares about, his sense of responsibility will increase. 5. Communicate more when encountering different opinions. Due to the differences in life experiences, ideas, and ways of doing things between parents and children, it is inevitable that conflicts will arise in life. This is what people often call the so-called \”generation gap.\” Bacon said: \”In a happy family, parents run the house with love, and children obey adults out of love for their parents.\” As a parent, you are willing to pay more for your children, and you also ask your children to understand and respect their parents, and be gentle to them. , don’t let your parents feel that you are being disliked while giving.