At what age is it appropriate for a baby to start setting rules?

Some time ago, news about \”naughty children\” causing trouble on high-speed trains appeared one after another, triggering heated discussions among netizens. The topic \”I really recommend that high-speed trains have a carriage for children\” became a hot search topic. On a high-speed train in Beijing, a 3-year-old child was persuaded by fellow passengers to stop him because he was making noise too loudly and for a long time. Later, the child\’s parents responded: \”I can\’t take care of my child, I can\’t control him!\” He echoed, \”If you find it too noisy, take the high-end train.\” On the high-speed train in Liuzhou, Guangxi, a boy kicked the front seat several times and recited multiplication tables loudly. Witnesses said that the front-seat passengers and flight attendants tried to stop him many times, but the parents remained indifferent and praised their children for reciting the rhymes well. Under the topic, many netizens resonated deeply and complained, saying that they were most afraid of encountering noisy children when taking the high-speed train or watching movies. Some netizens said sincerely: \”It\’s not that I can\’t tolerate children. My tolerance for children depends on the attitude of the guardian. I hope some parents can understand that being unable to control and inaction are two different things.\” It is undeniable that playing in public places is Fighting, casually destroying other people\’s things… Many \”naughty children\” in society grew up in this way with the connivance of their parents and making excuses for them to shirk their responsibilities. As Kazuo Inamori said: \”Overemphasis on respecting children\’s autonomy has turned into laissez-faire. Only freedom is given, but the obligation to be paired with freedom is hardly taught.\” This is very important for the cultivation of children\’s moral concepts and society. Adaptation and interpersonal interactions are disadvantageous. Liang Qichao once emphasized in \”On Preschool Education\”: \”One hundred years of life is based on early childhood education.\” Education should be started from an early age, and rules should also be established from an early age. [Full two seasons] Doctor of Psychology Zhang Yijun\’s mp3 of children\’s emotional intelligence course, teach you how to raise children with high emotional intelligence. Why should you set rules for your children as early as possible? There is such a passage in Dr. Dobson\’s book \”The Courage to Discipline\”: \”If the cliff If there is a railing on the side, people can dare to lean on the railing and look down, because they will not be afraid of falling. If there is no railing, everyone will stop far away from the cliff, let alone stand on the edge of the cliff and go down. Look.\” This railing is the \”rule.\” Rules allow people to have boundaries in their behavior and thus have relative freedom. Establishing rules on safety issues, such as not touching sockets, not playing on the street, not jumping from too high a place, not opening the door to strangers… ensures the safety of children. Establish rules in interpersonal communication, such as speaking properly when you have something to say, not hitting others or grabbing other people\’s things; being polite when visiting other people\’s homes, and not messing with other people\’s things… Let your children learn to respect others and consider others. Feelings, polite and educated. Establish public rules, such as being quiet when watching movies in the cinema or taking public transportation, and not disturbing others; throwing garbage into the trash can, not littering anywhere; obeying traffic lights; not jumping in line… Let children learn Self-discipline and take responsibility for your words and deeds. Establish rules in behavioral habits, such as going to bed early and getting up early; reading more and playing with mobile phones less; eating less sweets… to make children healthy and more self-disciplined. It is through various rules that children can have a more mature and profound understanding of the world and break the self-centered situation.Limit, be sensible, have empathy, speak and behave appropriately, and become a well-educated person with three correct views. Some parents feel that their children are naive and lively and naughty by nature, so they should not care too much and will be fine when they grow up. This is not the case. In child development psychology, the age of 3-6 is often called the \”wet cement period\”. This is the period when children have the strongest plasticity, and it is also a critical period for character shaping and habit formation. Children at this period have not yet formed their own understanding and concepts of things. Their parents\’ words are like \”golden rules\” to them, and they are more willing to obey them. When a child reaches junior high school and enters adolescence, behavioral habits and thinking concepts gradually take shape. At this time, the child\’s personal consciousness is very strong, and the influence of parents is declining day by day, making it even more difficult to change. What\’s more, the so-called \”nature\” also depends on the situation and the degree. No one is obligated to unconditionally tolerate children\’s offensive and disturbing behavior. If parents don\’t educate them, society will educate them severely. Therefore, it is important to establish rules as early as possible. 3-6 years old, setting rules for children will encounter the least resistance and the best results. In fact, children can be taught the proper rules when they are around 2 years old. Parents should set rules for their children and set a good example. Not long ago, when assessing the social adaptability of a middle-class child, a question came up: \”Can you not interrupt when your parents are talking?\” The child\’s answer made me a little bit confused. Accident. He said: \”I don\’t interrupt when my parents are talking. Usually I talk and they interrupt.\” Many times, parents set rules for their children, but they themselves break the rules. Slowly, the rules begin to lose their effectiveness in the children\’s hearts. For example, if parents ask their children to go to bed early and get up early, and play less mobile phones, but they always stay up late and never leave their mobile phones, the children will be unconvinced: \”Why can you do it but I can\’t?\” Parents\’ words and deeds are inconsistent, and children are even less willing to abide by the rules. Some parents even take the lead in breaking rules and setting bad examples for their children. I once saw a video in which a tourist reached out to grab the tail feathers of a peacock, pulled them off hard, and handed the feathers to the children next to him in order to make his children happy. The peacock whose feathers were plucked was frightened and quickly ran away and flew to a high ground. Scenic area staff said that regardless of whether plucking the feathers will have any physical impact on the peacock, psychologically, the peacock will be afraid of humans for a long time. When it comes to setting rules, parents’ words and deeds play a key role. Children aged 2-6 may not understand what their parents say, but they will definitely imitate their parents\’ words and deeds. Therefore, as parents, you need to be cautious in your words and deeds and set a positive example for your children. If you want your children to obey the rules, parents must first do it themselves. For example, don’t make noise in public places, don’t damage the environment, obey traffic rules, and don’t jump in line when waiting in line. The same goes for the rules at home. If you want your children to go to bed early and get up early and have less contact with electronic products, parents must first set an example. Otherwise, no matter how many principles you teach your children, they will be unconvincing. When setting rules for children, let the children understand the reasons. Some parents lack an explanation link when setting rules for their children. They just forcefully instill them and force their children to implement them. Children often resist and do not cooperate. For example: Don’t read while eatingWatch TV, run around, and have to finish eating at the dinner table before leaving the table. The child feels that this rule affects his free activities and is unwilling to obey. At this time, if parents simply and rudely say to their children: \”This is the rule, it must be like this!\” It will easily arouse the children\’s unpleasant emotions and deliberately contradict the parents. When setting rules for their children, parents should let their children understand the purpose and rationale behind the rules, so that they can realize the benefits of following the rules. The child may not be able to realize it once or twice, but as time goes by, he will understand the reason. Put things back in their place after use to ensure that the home is tidy and orderly so that you can find them quickly next time; don’t make loud noises in public places because it will disturb others. If you think about it yourself, you don’t want to be disturbed; go home after school Complete your homework immediately before playing, so that you won’t be in a panic at night and can’t finish writing, and you can also get more free time… For older children, parents can also discuss with them: In the family , what kind of rules are needed in schools and public places, and why these rules are necessary. In this way, children will learn to think deeply in the process of obeying the rules, understand the rationality and necessity of the rules, and then voluntarily abide by them. Moreover, some rules are proposed by children themselves, and they will be more proactive and conscious when implementing them. Set rules for children with a gentle but firm attitude. Some parents set rules for their children, but cannot resolutely implement them. They change them at will when they see their children crying, acting coquettishly, or when they are in a good mood. For example, we agreed that we could only watch cartoons for 30 minutes a day. On that day, guests came, and the children took advantage of the busy schedule to act coquettishly and wanted to watch more cartoons. The parents did not want to quarrel with the children, so they agreed. If this happens more times, the rules will gradually lose their effectiveness. Children will feel that the rules can be broken, and they will become less and less willing to abide by them. Therefore, parents must have a firm attitude and let their children understand that the rules set must be followed. However, when communicating with your children, do not criticize them excessively for crying or being messy. Maintaining a patient and gentle tone will help you win your children\’s cooperation. Parents can say this: \”I know you want to watch it for a while, but we have agreed before that we must abide by the rules, right? I believe you can do it.\” Communicate with your children in an understanding and encouraging manner, It will make children feel good and confident about themselves, making them more willing to obey the rules. Set rules for your children, and if necessary, use some punitive measures to make them bear the consequences of their actions. I once saw the news that a child splashed ink downstairs from his window, causing the clothes of many residents to be dried on the balcony. Parents not only asked their children to write a review and post it in the owner group, but also took their children to apologize to each family, and washed the contaminated clothes with their children. In some important matters, only by personally taking action and bearing the consequences of their actions can children deeply understand the rules mentally and know how to restrain their own behavior. For example, if you tell your children not to throw objects at high altitudes, you can first explain the dangers to them, and then make an agreement with them: if you throw things downstairs, you will be punished by cleaning the downstairs for two weeks, and your family will ask you to do so.Supervise execution. It is the nature of children to be curious and lively, but it does not mean that parents can adapt to their children\’s \”nature\” anytime and anywhere. In specific events and occasions, parents cannot help their children escape, but should require their children to bear the consequences of their wrong words and deeds, face their mistakes honestly and bravely, and correct themselves. There is such a dialogue in the classic picture book \”I Will Always Love You\”: Ali: \”If I make feathers fly all over the pillow, will you still love me?\” Mom: \”I will always love you, but you have to collect the feathers.\” .\” Ali: \”If I spill painting paint on my sister, will you still love me?\” Mom: \”I will always love you, but you have to be responsible for bathing your sister.\” Yes, love and rules are not the same. Do not conflict. Love with rules and principles is more nutritious for the growth of children.