Cai Shaofen was angry. Such deadly jokes must not be played on children.

Recently I was watching the parent-child program \”Incredible Moms 2\”, and I became a fan of Ada Choi and her two baby girls Tangbao sisters from the beginning of the program. But towards the end of the first period, seeing the testing session inside made people feel very angry. In that program, the participating children were assigned a special task – to choose between their favorite toys and the \”Mom Accompanying Card\” representing their mother. Although several other children who participated in the program: Xiao Yu\’er, Qibao, and Eli also liked the toys in their hands, they all chose the \”Mom Accompanying Card\” in the end. However, the Tangbao sisters made different choices when faced with the staff\’s inquiries. The two sisters almost unanimously gave up their companionship cards and chose toys. After seeing the sisters\’ choices, the staff explained: \”If you choose the companionship card, your mother can accompany you; if you choose the toy, your mother cannot accompany you. You can only choose one.\” But the sisters still Hold the toy happily without changing your original intention. So, the staff smashed the \”Mother\’s Accompanying Card\” in front of the two sisters, and then told the two sisters that after the \”Mother\’s Accompanying Card\” was broken, their mother would not be able to accompany them for the next few days. The expressions of the two sisters became solemn at this time. After hesitating for a moment, my sister timidly asked: \”But no, it\’s okay in Hong Kong. Can I find my mother?\” The staff reiterated with certainty: \”My mother has been \’broken\’.\” When the game first started, Cai Shaofen had always said When Zaixiao saw this, her expression had changed, becoming a little sad and solemn. She said that her sister was going to cry. The two sisters really became nervous at this time. The sensible sister whispered something in her ear, and the younger sister hesitated. After a moment, he said uncertainly: \”But, it is false.\” The staff continued to say unwillingly: \”But you also chose it, and it is true.\” The sister insisted: \”But because my mother is not dead… this is false. But I want to be with my mother… I really want to…\” At the end of the sentence, my sister\’s tears began to flow down uncontrollably. Seeing my sister\’s expression is really heartbreaking! Cai Shaofen, who was arranged to watch the live broadcast, couldn\’t stand it anymore. She trotted to the filming site, hugged her two daughters tightly in her arms, and kept comforting: \”Mom is not dead, mom is not dead, mom will not leave you.\” .Mom is here, don’t be afraid!” The worries and fears of the two daughters were finally resolved by their mother’s hugs and kisses. To be honest, the program set up like this is very harmful to children. Perhaps their original intention is to let children learn to cherish their mother\’s company, but for children, it is easy to leave psychological damage. For a child, parents are the most important people, especially the mother, who is the child\’s source of security. If a family is compared to a big tree, the family composed of each of us and our parents (original family) who gave birth to us is a small branch on this big tree. The endless love of parents for their children is the driving force for the growth of the big tree and gives the big tree the nutrients to continue to grow. This love is innate and is something that a child will never lose in the world and will accompany the child throughout his life. When children are young, their mother is theirsEverything, they see themselves through their mother\’s eyes. When children grow up and realize that their mother and themselves are two people, they will be afraid of being separated from their mother. Therefore, babies after 6 months of age will develop separation anxiety every time they are separated from their mother. At this stage, they are not sure that their mother will come back after leaving, so they will cry and scream even if they are only separated for a while. If the mother can patiently tell her when she will come back every time she is separated from her baby, and appear in front of the child on time at the agreed time, the child will gradually know that even if she is separated from her mother, even if she cannot see her, When she comes to her mother, her mother will come back and she will feel at ease. However, if you tell the child that her mother doesn’t want her anymore. The child will lose all sources of security in her heart. She will think that she has been abandoned and isolated from the family. This is the child\’s greatest fear. There was a tragic news last year. A 6-year-old girl was at her brother\’s full-moon banquet because someone jokingly said to her: \”Mom has a brother, and I won\’t want you anymore!\” My brother was thrown from the balcony on the 6th floor! From this tragedy we can see how lethal this sentence is! No one, under any circumstances, can use the phrase \”your mother doesn\’t want you anymore\” to joke with a child! As an adult, you cannot use this sentence casually to communicate with your children. As parents, we must never use this as a threat to say to our children: \”I don\’t want you anymore!\” when their children are naughty, disobedient, or crying. When parents say \”I don\’t want you anymore\” to their children, At this time, there is no doubt that the child is excluded from the family. When a branch is broken (the family is no longer complete), the child loses the support and strength of the tree as a whole. This is the biggest stifle to children\’s spiritual growth. Even as an adult, when faced with the threat of parents severing the parent-child relationship (for example, when choosing a partner, when you have to choose between a partner or a parent), you will still feel speechless and sad, or even reluctantly give in, let alone a child. A child who doesn’t know much about the world? Maybe some mothers will say: I am just scaring my child, not really abandoning him. Yes, when many of us say these things to our children, we use them as a means of blackmail, and we may even say them unconsciously. However, the child will not understand the true intentions of the parents\’ words. He will only remember the fear and fear caused by \”Mom and Dad don\’t want me anymore.\” Looking at the reaction of Cai Shaofen\’s daughter, everyone will understand how lethal this sentence is. Even many adults, when faced with the person they love, may succumb and give up their beloved if this person happens to be someone their parents don\’t like, or if their parents threaten to expel him from the house. We can know that even adults are afraid that their mothers will not want them! Therefore, for children who are not familiar with the world, this joke must not be said easily. Some mothers may say that it is of no use if I say this to my children. There are two possibilities for this situation. One is that there is a problem with the intimate relationship between you and your child. There are certain problems with your normal parent-child interaction. In the child\’s mind, the mother is not the most important person. Another canMaybe you say this too much, and your child has seen through your lie: he knows that you are reluctant to leave him. In either case, it is harmful to the parent-child relationship. Because the child suffered tremendous pain, deep hatred had already been buried deep in his subconscious. The child grows up day by day, and when one day he has enough power, he will treat his parents in the same way: If you didn\’t want me when you were a child, I don\’t need you when I grow up! This is one of the reasons why many parent-child relationships are completely broken down today. Having said this, some mothers may be worried, how to make up for this problem if it has already occurred? In fact, Cai Shaofen has given a good example. If you really accidentally hurt your child, make up for it in time. When the child hears other people\’s jokes, the mother must tell the child solemnly in person that she will never abandon him at any time! If the child cannot be contacted by his mother for various reasons, he must tell the child very solemnly at this time that we may not be able to see the mother for the time being, and tell the child the exact time when we can meet with the mother. You must not fool your children just to save yourself trouble. Fooling around may cause a greater psychological shadow on the child. Of course, if parents say so themselves, they must also admit their mistakes to their children in a timely manner! In a child\’s world, mother is the sky, the earth, and everything to the child. \”Mom is gone\” or \”Mom doesn\’t love me anymore\” is as serious as the earth falling apart. Not just sad, just desperate. Under any circumstances, no matter how angry or angry you are, please avoid saying these hurtful words.