Children of considerate parents are not tailor-made, but nourished with love

At 9 o\’clock in the evening, I helped my 4-year-old daughter put clean pajamas on the bedside, and she changed into them and got ready to go to bed. I picked up a pile of dirty clothes and said to myself: \”I don\’t feel well today. Mom will wash these tomorrow.\” Xiaomipao covered the quilt with me and said to me: \”Don\’t worry, Mom, we will wash it tomorrow.\” Wash together.\” Hearing what Xiaomi Gu said, his heart warmed up, and he kissed his daughter goodnight. Walking out of her daughter\’s room, I thought about Xiaomi\’s thoughtful words just now. Sometimes a child\’s casual words can warm me as a mother for a long time. Please don\’t laugh, I am such a \”promising\” mother. Usually, I am responsible for the food of the family of three, so the kitchen is my territory. As soon as my father gets off work and washes his hands, he will come to help me. Sometimes even if I can handle it, I will still arrange for my father to do some small things like peeling onions and garlic. After seeing the millet paste, he will definitely come and shout for it. Get involved to help. Sometimes, my father is looking for his information book on the bookshelf. If he can’t find it after searching for a long time, I will ask: “Do you want to help?” When Xiaomi sees it, he will also help. Things like this, and things like how family members help each other, are often seen and remembered by Xiaomi, and he naturally learns a lot. Therefore, Xiaomi, who is over 4 years old, knows how to sympathize with her parents\’ hard work and is willing to share the housework. This is inseparable from the guidance we give her bit by bit. Millet paste has never left me since I was born. I usually communicate with me the most as a mother. I am also a first-time mother. I am learning and practicing while working. I found that millet paste likes to hear nice things, such as praise. Before Xiaomi was two and a half years old, my father and I just said: \”Baby, you are awesome!\” Later, I discovered that this \”you are awesome\” is so cookie-cutter. As the child grows up day by day, not only does it not have much effect, The effect may even be counterproductive. Through reading parenting books, learning + practicing, I feel more and more that treating children is really a science. I have summarized the following aspects for reference by mothers and fathers: 1. Express gratitude and say \”thank you\” more. These two words are the most spoken in our family. \”Thank you\” never leaves our lips. Take today as an example. I was going to take millet paste to the supermarket, but I forgot to bring a reusable bag before going out. Millet paste helped me get the biggest one. When I took it, I quickly said to her: \”Thank you, baby.\” Checking out at the supermarket When I arrived, I handed my membership card and prepared cash to Xiaomipa to pay the bill and said: \”Please help mom pay, thank you.\” When I got home, I poured water for Xiaomipao to drink, and the child consciously learned to say to me: \”Thank you, Mom.\” It\’s that simple. We do it to the children first, and over time, the children will learn it. 2. Never hesitate to say \”I love you\”. In our family, emotional expression starts with our parents. When dad comes home from get off work, Xiaomi will take the initiative to open the door and ask for a password. Even if he hears his voice, he will have to answer the password correctly before he can open the door. And the first thing after opening the door, Xiaomi Gu will say to his father: \”Dad, you have worked hard at work.\” And my father will always go to the kitchen first and say to me: \”Mom, you have worked hard to take care of the baby.\” Maybe you will think haveIt\’s a bit pretentious, but in the eyes of a child, parents who respect each other like guests give her a very important sense of security. 3. Arrange housework for your children. After every family has a baby, washing and washing are indispensable. Adults love cleanliness. In addition to providing a healthy environment for their children, they also cultivate good habits in their lives. Every Saturday is \”laundry day\” in our house. On this day, Xiaomi will be arranged to wash his own clothes. At first, the child found washing small towels very interesting. It can play with water and make bubbles, so sometimes it can take more than an hour to wash a small handkerchief with millet paste. After too many times, it no longer feels like much fun, and she starts to play tricks, saying that she wants to read a book to avoid doing housework. At this time, the mother cannot be soft-hearted, but she can change the trick, such as putting a few items and letting the child choose one that must be completed. of. This is the skill of choice. Give A or B and let the children choose from them instead of bargaining, so mothers must persist. 4. Encourage the child to try again and don’t rush to help. Our millet paste is a girl. It\’s normal to act coquettishly, especially towards my father. Sometimes I want to ask my father to do something that I can do, such as turning on the lamp for reading. I always ask my father for help. After I witnessed it a few times, I told my father privately that this You can refuse to do something and let your daughter do it by herself. Dad always thinks it is a trivial effort and does not take it seriously. Later, he also calls daddy for other small things, and dad pays attention to my suggestions. I once saw a child trying to tear off a snack packaging bag, and his mother grabbed it and helped him open it. I think it would be better if you let the child try and open it. Respecting children not only refers to their thoughts and wishes, but also gives them opportunities to exercise. Instead of doing everything for you, encourage your children to use their brains and learn to solve problems on their own. 5. Let children experience the consequences of natural behaviors. Yesterday, before my daughter went to bed, her father reminded her to put away the entire set of \”Journey to the West\” neatly, but she didn\’t pay attention. I thought about it and didn\’t help her put it away. Finally, he came back to me in the afternoon and said: \”Mom, I want to read \”Journey to the West\”.\” I said: \”Okay.\” After a while, Xiaomipao came to me and asked: \”Mom, why are two copies of Sun Wukong missing? ?\” I smiled and said to her: \”Because someone didn\’t put it back on the bookshelf in time after reading it yesterday. Could it be that the book disappeared in the clouds like Sun Wukong?\” Xiaomipa said: \”Ah! It\’s so true that it\’s fake. Mom, I know, I will put the books away in time in the future.\” It is better to let the children realize what needs to be corrected than to preach. 6. Make your child feel needed by you. Once, I went home with Xiaomi Gu and encountered a problem when opening the door. Because my hands were full of things, I had to leave it to my daughter to carry when I opened the door. As a result, I didn’t think too much about it. For a serious question, the child couldn\’t hold it and dropped it to the ground. The egg broke on the spot. I really wanted to get angry, but I held it back. I knelt down and told my daughter: \”You see, raw eggs are very easy to break. I\’m afraid of falling. I\’ll see later.\” You must handle raw eggs with care.\” From that day on, I handed the key to my daughter and began to teach Xiaomi to open the lock of the security door. It took about a week to learn it. Now every time I come home, my daughter opens the door, and every time I say \”Thank you.\”Thank you for helping mom, it’s great to have you as my daughter! \”7. Let your children feel the same way as you. Don\’t be afraid of everyone\’s jokes. I am a mother with a very low tear point. When I was young, I would cry when watching TV series following the tragic situation of the protagonist. Now that I am a mother, I still cry because of some things that are looked down upon by others. I shed tears. I remember that the little goldfish I had fed on millet died and the child didn’t cry. I fell to the side and cried. When my daughter wiped my tears with her little hands and asked my mother what’s wrong with you? Before I had time to say anything, Millet Paste also hugged me and started crying. At this time, I hugged Millet Paste tightly and said, \”Mom is feeling sad. It feels good to cry.\” \”Baby, what\’s wrong with you? Tell your mother. If you have anything to say, feel comfortable.\” \”…I read in a book that when a mother cries, and the child can put down the toys in her hands and ask you why she is crying, it means that the child has rich emotions and a kind heart, because she can empathize with her. I have always felt that I and I My daughter, except that I raised her, we are very much like friends who talk to each other about everything, very much like comrades fighting side by side, very much like classmates who study together, very much like lovers who rely on each other… In short, I just feel that Dad Mothers must be full of love for their children, so that they can nourish their children\’s minds and truly enter their hearts. Similarly, children who are nourished by love will also become considerate and grateful children.