Children often say 4 \”mantras\”, which proves that their emotional intelligence is very low. If they don\’t change it early, they will suffer big losses in the future.

We always say that IQ is important, but in fact, emotional intelligence is also very important. If a person has low emotional intelligence, it will be difficult for him to understand the emotions and intentions of others, and he will have difficulty in interpersonal relationships. Moreover, if you have low emotional intelligence, you will inevitably be \”stupid\”. What you say will not express your intention, and you may offend others without knowing it, and you will easily suffer losses. The most important thing is that if you have low emotional intelligence, it will be difficult to manage your emotions. As a result, you will often feel unhappy, dissatisfied, and unsatisfactory, and it will be difficult to gain happiness. The level of emotional intelligence can be seen from an early age. If a child often says 4 \”mantras\”, it proves that the emotional intelligence is very low and should be changed as soon as possible. 1: \”I don\’t care, I will.\” When I was walking around the mall, I saw a little boy clamoring to take the \”little train\” in the mall, but it was already full. At this time, my mother persuaded me to sit down. The little boy was not happy and held on to the door frame of the small train to prevent him from leaving. He even shouted: \”I don\’t care, I want to sit down, now!\” His mother wanted to take him down, but he kicked her away hard and said : \”Ask others to come down, I will sit here.\” The boy\’s shout attracted many people to watch. In the end, the security uncle took the boy down, but the boy\’s cries resounded throughout the entire floor. The child is indifferent and often says \”I don\’t care, I want it\”. This usually means that he has very strong needs for himself, but he does not think about problems from the perspective of others and lacks understanding and empathy. They only focus on their own needs and want immediate gratification. Why are children like this? The main reason may be that the family is usually very pampering and puts them first in everything. Even if the child\’s request is unreasonable, the parents will give in after crying. When we usually raise our children, we need to tell them that if they want to meet their needs, they must learn to \”wait\” and \”share\”. When the child is stubborn, we can also provide a choice: \”Do you want to go there by yourself, or does your mother accompany you?\” Such guidance will be more effective than a head-on command, and it can also help the child learn to wait patiently. Two: \”You must listen to me\” When playing together, those children who are overbearing are generally not popular. They may have taken a fancy to a toy and snatched it away. When playing games, he just wants everyone to listen to him. If others don\’t listen to him, he will get very angry, yell, and may even hit others. Asking others to listen to you shows that the child is more self-centered. He only sees his own feelings and needs and is unwilling to consider other people\’s ideas. Such a personality will also be overly controlling in interpersonal relationships, hoping to control the situation and unwilling to compromise or give in. It is easy for this kind of child to have trouble making friends, and no one wants to play with him. We can usually guide children to express their needs correctly, such as: I want to play with this toy, can you lend it to me? I think it\’s fun to play like this because I\’ve done it before, so let\’s try it. Expressing needs can help achieve cooperation and is more likely to be accepted than directly asking for orders. Three: \”These are all mine.\” When I watch my daughter play, I often hear some children say: \”These are all mine, you are not allowed to touch them.\” Or some children like to say: \”This is my home, not yours.\” \”Home, you are not allowed to take my things.\” When children are 2-3 years old, they don\’t know how to share.You do take your own things very seriously. But if after the age of 6, the child is still unwilling to share, it may be a sign of low emotional intelligence. Children who use \”These are all mine\” as their mantra usually show strong possessiveness. Not only does this affect their relationships, it can also lead to them being isolated in social situations. We can encourage him more and positively reinforce his sharing behavior. For example, when a child has sharing behavior, we tell him in time: \”I saw you sharing delicious food with your good friends. You two are so happy. Mom also feels happy when she sees you being so generous.\” Four: It\’s not my fault, it\’s all my fault… Most people are afraid of punishment and don\’t want to be blamed. It\’s normal when children avoid responsibilities. But if the child habitually shirks responsibility and feels that the root of the problem lies with others rather than himself, then we need to pay attention. Especially for small mistakes, the child refuses to admit it and cannot explain it. This will make it difficult for children to form the habit of reflection, and there will be a lack of opportunities for correction. Children habitually shirk responsibility as a way of protecting themselves from criticism. We may be too harsh on our children. When we encounter a problem, the first thing we think of is accountability and criticism, but we forget to tell our children the correct approach and how to avoid it next time. Once we focus on \”whose fault\”, children will lose the opportunity to learn and grow, and will not dare to take responsibility and like to blame others for their mistakes. When we raise children, we can focus more on \”what to do\”. Once my daughter accidentally spilled the beans we were shelling, and she looked at me in panic. I resisted the subconscious blame and said, \”Oh, the beans have been spilled. What should I do?\” My daughter immediately said, we can just pick it up and wash it again. After handling the beans, I said, \”It seems that we can\’t rush things next time. If we do things more slowly, we won\’t let the beans spill, right?\” My daughter nodded seriously. After that, she became much more stable and stopped doing things. Hairy hands and hairy feet. Children\’s emotional intelligence is reflected in many aspects, and the above four mantras are some of them. I hope your child never said any of these 4 mantras~