Do you care about adolescent children?

The famous psychologist Winnicott said: \”If children will become adults, then this progress will be achieved by stepping on the corpse of an adult.\” He also said: \”You sow a baby, but you reap a baby.\” Bomb.\” Although it is a bit exaggerated, I still have a deep understanding of it in the past two years. Sometimes I\’m in a good mood, but the next minute I\’m in a bad mood. Datian has been riding a bicycle to and from school alone for the past two days. After school yesterday, I decided to ride a bicycle home with her. The main purpose was to review the safety issues with her and to communicate with her more. At this stage, A child is both independent and dependent. Let her be independent and create more opportunities for communication. We rode all the way back and she rode better than I did. My bicycle was only put on the road when I was about 30 years old, and it is not as good as hers, which I have been doing since I was a child. Most of the time, she would stop and wait for me, and we would talk about school. In the evening, she asked me to open Tmall Genie as usual and said she would listen to it for a while before doing my homework. I opened it and told her not to listen and to concentrate on her homework. She promised very well. When I opened the app at night, she was listening and doing it at a very low volume. I walked directly into her room and said calmly, why are you still listening when you are doing your homework? Didn’t you listen to your promise to do your homework? She became angry and said that I was spying on her, and actually told me to get out. Then he unplugged the Tmall Genie and let me take it away. I was petrified all of a sudden, and I said, baby, you can\’t talk to your mother like this, she won\’t listen at all. I left the room heartbroken. In the past, I would have gone crazy. The books I have read in the past two years have not been in vain, and the hardships have not been in vain. I didn’t say much because I felt a little uncomfortable, but there was a third perspective, that is, metacognition, taking care of my own feelings. In the evening, she asked me to sign the school book. I wanted to review what had just happened with her, but before I could say anything, she asked impatiently if she wanted to sign or not, so I had no choice but to shut up and sign. I silently put away the Tmall Elf. Since she gave it to me, she was probably angry that I couldn\’t manage and control myself. In recent times, I have listened to many time-travel novels with hundreds of episodes. I think she subconsciously felt that she shouldn\’t listen to it during homework, but she didn\’t control herself and became very angry with herself, which she vented on me. The child\’s rebuke definitely affected my mood, so I silently ordered several books for her. Since she gave it to me, Tmall Elf has no plans to return it to her in the near future. Let’s wait until the novel addiction wears off. Then read more to her. As long as there are useful books for her to read, there will always be something she is interested in, even if she only has a taste of it. If you read the article, you are also welcome to give me recommendations in the message area. Psychologist Li Xue said in the book: \”The essence of education is the self-cultivation of parents. Parents are the root of all problems in their children, and love and freedom are the only answers.\” Is it true to insist on self-cultivation and give her love and freedom? No one can predict the correct answer, just have a clear conscience! Chen Xin, a doctor of developmental psychology, wrote in her book \”Holistic Parenting\”: Some parents are in charge, passing on beliefs and cultivating quality; some parents are in charge, passing on anxiety and stimulating rebellion; Some parents don\’t care, but they convey confidence and cultivateIt\’s self-knowledge; some parents don\’t care, what they convey is disappointment, and what they cause is self-abandonment. I hope that when I manage, I will convey my faith and cultivate my quality. No matter what, it conveys confidence and cultivates self-knowledge. Find a balance between taking care and not caring.