Does your child have a tantrum or be unreasonable when getting up? Maybe you misunderstood the child

I was a little frustrated the other day because I noticed that edamame was always dragging its feet in the morning. When I get up, I cry for a while, brush my teeth, wash my face, it feels too hot, and all kinds of rough hairs come out! Seeing that I was going to be late for kindergarten, I couldn\’t help but say a few words about edamame in a loud voice. So, Maodou Dad said to me when he was walking on the tree-lined road at night: \”My biological mother passed away early, but I remember one thing very clearly.\” \”When I was a child, I was very annoyed when I got up every day, and I was unhappy if I didn\’t do anything. But every morning when I lose my temper, my mother hugs me, satisfies me, and doesn’t rush me.” “She is tolerant and waits for me to finish losing my temper, and then silently helps me put on my clothes. Getting up to get angry is a magical thing. I disappeared two minutes after I left the house.\” \”But every time I think of my mother\’s forbearance, tolerance and long-term love in the morning, I feel very at ease. It\’s like my bad side will be loved by my mother and will not be loved by my mother. Refuse.\” Maodou\’s father continued with a smile, \”My mother never knew that the best memory she left for me was actually being angry for three minutes after getting up.\” I was stunned. Every morning, I insist on letting the unskilled Maodou practice stretching his pants and putting on his shoes. When I wake up every day, I blame Maodou for losing his temper and procrastinating. Some mothers said: Just give him a spanking if he gets up, and the unreasonable request is just to spoil him. However, do we really understand what \”waking up angry\” means to children? Am I doing something wrong in these three minutes every morning? I quickly checked some information and found that it is worth reshaping the three views of every mother: \”waking up gas\” is a normal physiological phenomenon. The principle is: when the child first wakes up, the peripheral nerves of the child begin to be in a highly active state. This state is very close to the physiological signals of anxiety and anger. Sometimes there is high demand and large mood swings, commonly known as \”waking up gas\”. Moreover, after waking up, the breathing rate speeds up, intestinal peristalsis increases, and the body will be dehydrated and feel hungry. In other words, at this moment of the day, when the baby gets \”waking up\”, he turns from a little angel into a little devil, but the mother must protect him! Because at this time, the baby\’s body is getting up, but his soul is still sleeping. Let’s put it this way, he can’t control how much he sends! \”Wake-up gas\” is the time of day when children need emotional comfort the most. If the child\’s \”wake-up gas\” is regarded as \”hypocrisy,\” the child will feel always rejected, which may reduce the sense of safety and belonging. Since that night, after listening to Maodou’s father’s story, I have lowered Maodou’s requirements when getting up. If he is learning to dress and put on shoes, I will not ask him the same thing when he gets up in the morning. On the contrary, I will take good care of his emotions, try to satisfy him, increase physical contact face to face, and let him feel my love and warmth. The anger after waking up usually disappears within two minutes after going out. Why do you have to be serious with your children at this time? What are the disadvantages of ignoring your child\’s \”wake-up tantrums\”? 1. Even if children learn to be independent, the efficiency is very low. Some mothers find that: Why can’t they do things that they would do at night but not in the morning? That\’s actually just getting up and being angry. Don’t be stupid and let your children learn new things when they wake up and are angry. Emotions are very important for children to learn things efficiently. Every time I teach Edamame to learn a new lifeSkills, such as putting on his own shoes and hanging his coat on a hanger, were scheduled for the afternoon after he got home from school, when he was at his highest mood. 2. Always experiencing rejection will cause children to have low self-esteem and unsatisfied emotional needs. Parental responses are important to children. If the child always gets no response to his coquettishness and crying when getting up, the child will feel frustrated when he is in the most negative mood, which is of no benefit to the child. 3. Both parents and children are in a bad mood, which has no constructive benefit to the parent-child relationship. The parent-child relationship needs to be gradually nourished by small things, of which positive emotions are a very important element. Be more tolerant of your children when they wake up angry. That little bit of \”spoiling\” will not spoil the children, but will make them feel that their parents understand and trust them. What should you do every morning? As a Maodou mother who is a veteran of \”waking up angry\”, let\’s talk about how to do it. 1. Be sure to extend the time you get up, 40 minutes is more appropriate. Never think that your child will brush his teeth and wash his face and go to kindergarten as you ask him to. As I said, the body of a child who has just woken up is up, but his soul is still in the sleep state! Leave as much time and room as possible for your child to have a buffer, and get your child up early. My experience is at least 40 minutes. 40 minutes to wake up? Yes! Give your children time to buffer emotionally. This is without having breakfast at home or going to kindergarten. Prepare what you need the night before. Otherwise, if you get impatient, you will yell at your child again. 2. Lower your requirements and help him with things like getting dressed and washing his face. The child who has just woken up is insecure and nervous, and rejecting him will make his mood worse. As long as it doesn\’t violate your principles, boldly meet his requirements! Every morning when she wakes up angry, Maodou hates wearing shoes. When she can\’t put them on, she hangs her head and gets angry. I will definitely help. Sooner or later the child will put on his own shoes, but the opportunity to develop positive emotions in him is gone. 3. When you are irritable, don’t talk. Use body language, hugs, and empathy. When I was a child, I was very angry when I got up. My mother would go crazy when she pushed me. I would just say one sentence in my heart: \”Don\’t mess with me, just say one more thing.\” \”If you don\’t hurry up, you\’ll be late for kindergarten!\” \”When will you be able to dress properly?\” Clothes?\” Instead, use body language to support your child. When he is angry, you hug him, kiss him, and help him dress faster. In short, talk less and support more. Think about the example of Maodou’s father. Didn’t the most tolerant and tolerant love that his mother gave him when he was at his most negative become his best memory? 4. After getting up, give your child a little water and calories. As mentioned before, after a child wakes up, his body will be particularly dehydrated and hungry. So give your child some water to moisten his throat first. Sometimes I will give Edamame a small piece of dark chocolate that he likes to eat. When he is in a good mood, he gets up smoothly. He is not fussy and I am not anxious.