Don’t blame your child for being lazy, he just has too low energy (with 5 ways to restore energy)

Children are not lazy but have low energy. Have you ever felt that your child seems a little lazy? He often loses energy to do things, stays in bed, doesn\’t like to communicate with you, has a bad temper, and can\’t bear to say a few words… In fact, your child is not lazy, it may be that his energy level is too low. American psychology professor David Hawkins once proposed the \”energy level theory\”. You can look at roughly which level a child is at: If children are in a state of low energy for a long time, it is like chronic poisoning, and the consequences will become increasingly serious. In the B station video \”Under the Light\”, Junko, a senior high school girl, talks about her personal experience. Affected by many factors such as family environment, academics, and interpersonal relationships, Junko has always felt confused and lacks motivation. Initially, she began to experience physical discomfort, such as indigestion and headaches. Subsequently, she lost interest in going to school, using her mobile phone, eating and drinking, and felt as if she had been hollowed out and lifeless. Eventually, Junko was diagnosed with severe depression and fell into deep pain, unable to extricate herself. If a person lacks energy for a long time, he may become depressed and listless in mild cases; in severe cases, his vitality may gradually be consumed and his original glory will be lost. Why does a person\’s energy become low? It is possible that his energy was drained away by words. Be careful that your words suck away the energy of your children. A study by the University of Iowa in the United States also showed that among the words parents say to their children every day, each child will receive an average of more than 400 negative comments a day, while only 30 positive comments will be received. many lines. \”Why are you so stupid?\” \”You can\’t do even the smallest thing!\” \”Why can\’t you do it when others can do it!\” \”What\’s going on in your head?\” \”You can\’t even do such a simple question!\” Stop crying, I won’t let you go if you continue to cry.” Are these words familiar? The vast majority of parents in the world truly love their children, but many times, their love inadvertently causes harm. The famous American pediatrician Adele Farber once said: \”Never underestimate the impact of your words on your child\’s life.\” The future of a child is hidden in the language of parents. Parents\’ denial, blow, and criticism will give their children negative psychological hints and turn them into their \”inner critical voices\”, which will gradually suck away their energy. A kind word brings warmth in three winters, but a bad word brings frost in nine months. If you talk too much in the negative, your energy will gradually decrease, and a person will not be far away from depression. The famous comedian Rowan Atkinson brought joy to the world with his classic image of \”Mr. Bean\”. Who would have thought that he was actually a patient with depression. The direct reason why he suffered from depression was the criticism from film critics. When he was filming the movie \”Johnny the British Spy\”, the film critics said a lot of unpleasant things to him. Under the strong psychological pressure, he suffered from depression. I suffered from depression and am still in the process of treatment. How can parents change the way they speak to improve their children\’s energy level? Method: Reconstruct language, reconstruct hope and redefine it, which is the \”meaning frame changing method\” I talked about in class. A foreign study shows that negative words have a powerful suggestive effect, and it only takes a second for negative words to have a powerful suggestive effect.Words can stimulate the brain and produce a large amount of cortisol, which in turn interrupts the brain\’s operation and impairs people\’s logical reasoning and language communication abilities. So, how to eliminate the harm of negative words? Family therapist Ms. Satya has some language secrets: She often changes the negative words used by her patients. For example, if the patient says, \”Doctor, I have encountered a problem recently,\” Satya will say, \”Come, tell me about the situation you encountered.\” She quietly replaces \”problem\” with \”situation.\” The patient would say, \”Doctor, my life is too difficult.\” Satya would say, \”Yes, your life is full of challenges now.\” She would quietly change \”difficulty\” into \”challenge.\” This method is called \”language reconstruction\”, also called \”redefinition\”. The so-called redefinition is to replace some key words in the original statement with new words that have similar meanings but different meanings. For example: \”problem\” – \”situation\” \”difficulty\” – \”challenge\” \”difficult\” – \”not easy\” \”no\” – \”have not found a way\” Although it is a change of a few words, the whole language is From negative content to positive content, after the child listens to it, the whole mood will become brighter unconsciously. Method: Instead of treating things rather than people, treat people first and then things. Seeing only things but not people is a habitual behavior of many people. This is because many people have been educated in this way. When you were a child, did you have this experience: Did you accidentally break a glass? At that time, you stood stupidly at the scene, overwhelmed by the thunderous wrath of your parents. They would scold you non-stop: \”Why are you so stupid, always breaking things? How many times have I told you, be careful? Be careful, you just don\’t have a good memory.\” If your parents are in a bad mood, they will pick up a feather duster and a rolling pin and say, \”I don\’t want you to have a long memory.\” Is your parents\’ behavior right for you or for the person? That\’s right, they only saw things but not people. They only saw the broken cups but not the shivering children. At this time, what will parents who focus on \”people\” do? They will take the child\’s hand over as soon as possible and ask with concern: \”Baby, let me see if there is any injury. You go sit on the sofa first, and mom will sweep up the glass shards to make sure you don\’t prick your feet. Broken cups If you break it, it will be broken. Mom knows you were careless.\” A child who grows up under this kind of care will definitely feel extra warm and happy. Three ways to improve self-worth. This is the cornerstone of children’s energy. Self-worth is the cornerstone of children’s energy. We can improve children’s self-worth in three aspects. First, parents’ unconditional love and acceptance. When a child grows up, he can feel from his parents that \”no matter how I behave, they love me\”, the child will form a belief in his heart that \”I am worthy of being loved\”. Second, get enough emotional attention. Before children learn to express themselves verbally, they use emotions to express themselves. When a child\’s emotions do not receive sufficient attention, he will think \”I am not good enough, I am not worthy of others\’ attention, and I am worthless.\” \”. Third, affirm the value of the child as a human being, but do not measure the value of the child by what the child does. The vast majority don\’tParents who have studied psychology will make this mistake, that is, when their children perform well, they will give affirmation, praise or material rewards. When a child encounters setbacks or fails to do something, the parents completely deny the child. In this way, the child\’s subconscious mind will receive the message: \”My value depends on what I do. When I cannot do something valuable for the time being, I am worthless.\” If you have done any of the above, please leave a message in the comment area.