From an early age, children will form their own opinions about themselves and what kind of person they think they are based on our language and evaluations. In other words, our children’s future is actually hidden in our language. Do not say the following five sentences to your children, lest they have a weak character and live a useless life in the future. One: \”I am your parent, you must listen to me.\” For many authoritative parents, their mantra is: \”I am your father/mother, you must listen to me.\” This kind of words, although in the current situation Make your children obedient and make parenting easier. But over time, children will develop a fear of authority. I feel that the words of an authoritative person are unquestionable and cannot be resisted. Such children, when they go to school or work in the future, and encounter stronger people, they will habitually obey and dare not raise objections. Even if he is bullied, he dare not say anything. Because his family education from an early age taught him that he must be obedient in front of authority. What can children eat to supplement their brain and enhance their memory the fastest? Children gradually lose their own judgment and ability to express opinions while being obedient, thus forming a submissive character. If we want our children to grow individually, we cannot show absolute authority in front of them. When children come up with different opinions, we might as well listen more and try to think about the problem from the child\’s perspective. A child who can think independently and dare to express his or her thoughts and opinions will be more independent and confident in the future. Two: \”If you don\’t obey, I won\’t love you anymore.\” When Cuckoo\’s mother was playing in the park, she heard another mother say to her son at least 10 times in half an hour: \”If you don\’t obey, I don\’t want you anymore.\” The son wanted to climb to a high place, but the mother felt it was dangerous. She said \”I\’m leaving\” and immediately asked her son to follow him obediently. The son wanted to play with the dirt, but the mother felt it was unclean. She said \”I don\’t want you anymore\” and immediately made her son cry and hug her legs tightly. The son wanted to buy a toy, but the mother refused. She immediately told her son to shut up by saying, \”If you don\’t obey me, I won\’t like you anymore.\” \”If you don\’t obey, I won\’t want you anymore.\” This sentence can be said to be the \” trump card \” of many parents. The child is naughty, naughty, and disobedient. As soon as these words are said, the child will immediately obey. Although the effect of this is immediate, it is also very \”destructive\” to the child. A child is naturally attached to his parents. Before he can survive independently, his parents are the guarantee of his survival. A parent\’s casual \”I don\’t want you anymore\” sounds to a child like a huge fear of being abandoned and threatened with survival. This is why, as long as parents say this, children will basically be obedient. The child is simple-minded and cannot tell whether what his parents say is true or false. Once his parents really don\’t want him or love him anymore, it may be really difficult for him to survive. Our casual words are a matter of \”life and death\” to our children. Therefore, we should not think that this sentence is effective for children and treat it as a mantra. This kind of threat will increase children\’s fear and lack of security. When they grow up, they will easily become weak and obedient when threatened. Three: \”Don\’t talk back to me!\” When children express their opinions loudly, we sometimes feel offended and scold the child: \”Don\’t talk back to me!\” ITheir suppression will make the child feel that parents have the right to control his words and deeds, and that he cannot express his opinions at will. The child may become withdrawn and afraid to tell his parents anything. It is also possible that the child will become rebellious, and he will feel: \”Why are you the only one who has the final say?\” Therefore, he will find ways to compete for \”power\” from his parents. If you ask him to do it, he will do it. And believes that the only way to gain power is to fight. This will cause children to develop an aggressive personality, and they will not know how to handle things in a gentle way, but will act impulsively. When this kind of personality grows up, it is easy to suffer losses. Four: \”Don\’t embarrass me.\” Cuckoo\’s mother saw a girl before. She was invited to participate in a dance competition. Before leaving, her father did not encourage her, but said: \”Don\’t embarrass me!\” She was still very happy. The child, after hearing this, his face turned pale, bit his lip and left. Maybe my father’s original intention was to dance well and become my pride. But what the father said really hurt the child\’s heart. Whenever a child behaves badly or the parents are angry, we can\’t help but blurt out: \”Why did I give birth to you…\” Words like this will make the child feel extremely ashamed. I feel like I am a loser, unable to do anything well, with no merit. With such low self-esteem, children will feel particularly inferior and lack self-confidence. Even if he does well enough, he still doesn\’t believe in himself. He needs to live in the evaluation of others and can only affirm himself through the approval of others. Five: \”Why are you so stupid?\” Once, my niece came to me with red eyes and tears. I asked her what was going on, and she replied angrily: \”My mother said I was too stupid!\” It turned out that it was her mother who taught her to adjust the network at home on the phone. She failed to adjust it for a long time, and the other party lost her patience. Her mother couldn\’t help scolding her. Sometimes, when a child\’s performance is not as satisfactory, or his learning is not as good as when we were young, we will doubt ourselves: \”How does this child look like me? Where did my smart genes go?\” When we are anxious, we will inevitably blame. The child is \”stupid\”. As everyone knows, if such a label is attached to a child, it may be difficult for him to remove it. He heard that he was \”stupid\” too often, and gradually, he really felt that he was stupid. Even if he fails to do the smallest things in life, he can\’t help but give himself psychological hints: \”I\’m so stupid, I can\’t do this well.\” Once there are too many hints, the child may really become less smart. . Moreover, he will also have doubts about his abilities, dare not try new things, and find it difficult to seize opportunities in life. It is best not to say the above 5 sentences to our children, lest they become weak in character and live a useless life in the future. What other words do you think you should not say to your children?
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