Dou Guimei, principal of the Primary School Affiliated to Tsinghua University: The sequence of family education

Family education is important, but often ignored by parents. Parents believe that the family should not bear the main responsibility for education and that education should be a matter for the school. What parents need to do is: provide good material conditions for their children so that they have enough food and clothing. Find a school with high teaching quality for your child so that your child can enjoy the best educational resources. Plan the future direction for your children, get into a good university, and find a good job. Doing this is a good parent, but is it really so? Nowadays, most of the problems that occur in children are caused by family reasons, and the family of origin is increasingly valued. \”The Road Less Traveled\” mentioned that the reason why the native family is important is that children can fully develop their self-awareness, awareness of others and awareness of organization in a loving environment, which means that they can become an independent and complete person. individual. When the children were young, their parents were busy with work and had no time to take care of their children. They also believed that children should not be taken care of before they were 3 years old, so they left them to the elderly. Only when the children go to school do they think of taking care of them, but the children are not close to them and think that their parents are not qualified to take care of them. As a result, parent-child conflicts are inevitable. Parents do not reflect on their own behavior and blame their children for disobedience. Nowadays, society has increasingly reached a consensus that parents are the first persons responsible for the education of their children, and family education is more important than school education. So where should family education go? Many parents are first-time parents and are unsure of the right path. Dou Guimei, principal of the Primary School Affiliated to Tsinghua University, once said: The best family education is to put sugar first, then salt, and then calcium supplement. A condensed sentence, but it contains profound parenting philosophy. Put the candy first to give your children abundant love and security. Wu Zhihong said that in childhood, parents’ unconditional love is like creating a safe island. Only with a safe island in their hearts can children explore the world and interact with others with confidence. Many children are obsessed with games when they grow up, do not communicate with their parents, and even treat them coldly. It\’s not that the game is so attractive, but that they need to build a virtual safety island themselves because their hearts are empty. Even if there are no games, children will be obsessed with other things, such as making a friend who is not seeking advancement. Many friends are complaining about the game, but in fact the starting point is wrong. Parents love their children and want them to feel loved. When your children are young, hug them more and express warmth through body language. Understand your children when they make mistakes, encourage your children when they make progress, respect your children\’s ideas, and don\’t force your children, and your children will feel loved and safe. To add more salt, it means teaching children to face setbacks. Professor Li Meijin said: There are so many setbacks in life, how dare you pamper your children? Children should be allowed to endure hardships, exercise courage, courage, and will, and face setbacks head-on. Many children have very high IQs, but their hearts are fragile and can break like eggshells. Once they encounter setbacks, they often run away from home or commit suicide by jumping off a building. It\’s because he was so smooth when he was a child, and his parents supported him like a star and didn\’t let him suffer any grievances or hardships. Such cases are very common. Some doctors, graduate students, and students from some prestigious universities also despise life. Many people can\’t figure it out. They are all the pride of heaven and the objects of envy. How could they end up on the road of no return? In fact, they are not rich inside and have not enough.strong. It is necessary to cultivate children\’s ability to resist setbacks from an early age, dare to say \”no\” to children before they are 6 years old, let children do physical exercises, help parents do things, let children suffer some hardships, and hone their will. Fan Deng Reading Club: Five Compulsory Courses for New Parents in Family Education [Video + Audio] Supplementing calcium is to help children learn to be independent. Teacher Yin Jianli said that the first task of maternal love is to be close to the child and care for the child\’s growth. The second task It is to separate from the child and promote the child\’s independence. Nowadays, many children have very poor independence. They are accustomed to relying on their parents at home, and it is difficult for them to adapt when they enter school. If you don\’t know how to organize your own things, make friends, communicate, express yourself, and insist on yourself, it will be difficult to be in a good learning state, and you may even be tired of learning. Parents are willing to let go and cultivate their children\’s independence before they go to school. The cultivation of independent ability cannot be achieved overnight. It needs to be accumulated bit by bit in life and gradually become stronger. In real life, parents should pay attention to letting their children practice it themselves. Small things such as packing school bags and tidying up the room should be left to the children themselves. These are all things that practice makes perfect, and the children will become more comfortable doing them. Psychologically, parents should pay attention to providing foreseeable guidance so that children can realize what they may encounter after going to school and learn to analyze and solve problems. You can explain it to your children through parent-child reading so that they can understand it better. Family education is a very profound knowledge. It is not as simple as providing children with enough food and clothing. Parents must also pay attention to their children\’s development from many aspects such as behavioral habits, quality, ability, and psychological quality to provide them with the best education.