My daughter is lively and quirky by nature, and she always has many strange ideas in her little head. Whenever my daughter looks at me with her little eyes full of questions, I always indulge in it, and then try my best to search for my knowledge reserves in my mind to meet the needs of her inquiring baby. Sometimes when your brain is \”out of memory\”, you have to turn to other channels to avoid shortage. All along, I have been adhering to the principle of \”when water comes, earth will cover it, and when soldiers come, we will stop it\”, and I have been fine. ◆ ◆ ◆ ◆ ◆ Until one day, I felt that I had encountered a problem, and for the first time I felt \”out of my depth\”. It was a parent-child reading, and the title of the picture book was \”Grandma went to a distant place.\” At first, the little baby was immersed in the book, feeling the deep love from grandma in the book. Suddenly, the scene in the book changed. One day, grandma stopped getting up to prepare breakfast and went to a \”distant place\”. The lonely figure and sad expression of the little protagonist in the book, I think, must have touched some unknown corner of the child\’s heart. Because I saw crystal tears streaming down my daughter\’s cheeks. Tears fell one after another, hitting my heart. I didn\’t expect it, and I was a little confused. My daughter was less than three years old at the time. Maybe I subconsciously felt that at this age, she would not be interested in such a profound topic, nor would she ask me such difficult questions as \”Where is the distant place?\” Her sobbing words made me feel heartbroken. I couldn\’t explain the question that even I avoided, so I coaxed and deceived to bring the incident to an end. In this peak showdown, I ran away. Later I learned about the hasty ending this time, which laid a negative foundation for similar \”life and death issues\” in the future. After this incident, I have been looking for solutions to the problem. I tried to downplay and divert attention, and I also tried to portray that \”death\” is actually another way of \”living\”, but it never solved the problem. Later, when such life and death issues appeared in movies, TV shows, and books, my daughter would inevitably feel sad. But after all, these are fictitious, not characters in her life, so she didn\’t take it too seriously after crying. Later, this topic was shelved because we avoided it intentionally or unintentionally. It was not until one year during the Qingming Festival that our sisters brought their children to pay homage to our father’s grave. This topic was again realistically placed in front of us. I don’t know who said: “Children, please help scatter paper money. These can be used by grandpa.” Maybe this is just a reflection on our part, but the children didn’t think so. My daughter immediately asked: “Where is grandpa?” Grandpa lives in a \”little house.\” \”Why doesn\’t he come out?\” Another conversation on similar topics followed. In this conversation, I gave up my previous secretive attitude and said bravely: \”Grandpa passed away and will never come back!\” I thought that instead of letting her cry and ask me for grandpa, it would be better to be straightforward. Tell her the truth. Although it was a bit cruel, it was better than letting her fantasy still exist in her mind. This powerful medicine made the children understand the irreversibility of death, but it also created another problem, that is, the children began to fear death and loss.A deep sense of insecurity. ◆ ◆ ◆ ◆ ◆ I began to be confused. What should I do to eliminate my child’s fear of death and face the issue of death calmly? Until one day, my daughter cried and said: \”I want to become a little magic fairy with Balala energy. I want the person I love to be able to live. I want you to have a father. I want grandpa and grandma to live together.\” When I lamented that my daughter has such emotional intelligence, I also understood that all this comes from love and the fear of the lack of love. I have a deeper understanding on this issue. I decided to use my lifelong love to dilute your fear of death, and also want you to understand that life is only once. Each of us must love life, respect life, cherish everyone in life, and take everything in life seriously. thing. Maybe my previous approach was biased on this issue, but I have been thinking about it and looking for the best solution to the problem. I think every parent will encounter this problem, and everyone\’s thoughts and practices will be different. In the process of educating children, we are all growing and being educated. My child, I want to tell you that although grandpa’s “little house” blocks time and space, it cannot block love. Baby, we love you, forever and ever! Text | Yifan
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