Four fatal educational mistakes parents are most likely to make! How many shots did you get?

The famous educator Locke said: \”Mistakes in education are more serious than other mistakes. Mistakes in education are just like dispensing the wrong medicine. If you make a mistake the first time, you can never make up for it the second time or the third time. Their consequences The influence cannot be erased throughout life.\” Parents are their children\’s first teachers. In \”education that cannot be reworked\”, of course, we must learn first and think before teaching! 1. Breaking promises We often hear parents say that their children \”never do what they promise\” and \”have no sense of responsibility\”, but they have never paid attention to the root cause of their children\’s irresponsibility. This kind of irresponsibility, to put it bluntly, is a manifestation of breaking one\’s word and making random promises. In adult society, it is difficult for a person who breaks one\’s word to be trusted by others, so adults rarely break one\’s word at work, but it is strange. What\’s more, in parent-child interactions, there are many parents who \”break their promises\”. For example, they make plans with their children to play or buy toys together on the weekend, but then cancel the activities at the last minute. This is the most typical example. For children, parents are doing this thing of \”breaking their word\”. If this happens often, it will very easily affect the child\’s behavior pattern and cast doubt on \”what they say they will do\”. , questioning the words of parents, and in the long run, an \”irresponsible\” character will be formed, which will be harmful to work and study. 2. Take care of everything There are some parents who love their children very much. They hold it in their hands for fear of falling or hold it in their mouths for fear of melting. They wish they could prepare everything for their children and feed every bite of food into their mouths. But will the children educated in this way be good? Not necessarily. Childhood is an important period for children to learn how to get along with the outside world. If parents do everything and solve everything for their children, it will greatly weaken the child\’s ability to perceive the outside world, thereby affecting the child\’s judgment and ability to take care of themselves. While extremely dependent on parents\’ help, they also extremely hate their parents\’ help. This kind of emotion is an extreme manifestation of children losing control of their own lives. Most of the \”unruly children\” appearing in social news are products of \”arranged education.\” Isn\’t this enough to warn parents? 3. Destructive criticism Criticism is a very important part of education, but do you know? Criticism also requires methods. When we were young, our parents often criticized us like this: \”I don\’t have a son (daughter) like you!\” \”Why are you so stupid!\” These criticisms without specific direction can be called \”destruction\” \”Sexual criticism\”, a criticism method that directly attacks personality, is now used by many parents, thinking it is a spur to their children. But many times, this kind of encouragement does not become the motivation for children to learn as we hoped. Instead, it affects the child\’s personality value, and the child will feel that his dignity is worthless. If your child still talks back because of this, it means that his self-esteem has not been completely destroyed, but once the child starts to break the rules and say, \”Yes, I am like that,\” it will be difficult for parents to educate them effectively. 4. During the New Year and holidays, relatives and neighbors will discuss their children at the dinner table. The Wang family’s son got third in the exam, the Li family’s daughter got first in the exam, etc. It is inevitable to talk about this kind of things. The behavior of forcing children to be at the center of discussions is harmful to the child’s mental health.The health is very disadvantageous. Children who are good at studying will inflate themselves in the praise of their parents, while children who are average in study will depreciate themselves in the half-truth and half-false disdain. These will not allow children to get a positive education, but will make them lose themselves. In addition, some parents teach their children in front of everyone after they make mistakes, but what is disappointing is that this method does not make the children aware of their mistakes, and it also creates a great sense of shame. As a result, some children will become inferior and sensitive, while others will become aggressive. Therefore, when a child makes a mistake outside, parents must wait until they return home to guide the child to recognize his or her mistake without affecting the child\’s character. After all, the purpose of education is to allow the child to correct his mistakes rather than to make the child feel ashamed. Parents should always remember that in terms of personality, their children are equal subjects to themselves. Children are born with the right to be respected. Please respect your children as you respect yourself, your leaders, colleagues, and friends.