Hateful sentence: As a sister, you should give way to your brother!

The sentence I heard most when I was a child is: As an older sister, you have to be more supportive of your younger brother. The only thing in my life that I have not given up to my brother is that I was born a year before him. This year is a magical year, it seems to make me strong, brave and wise all of a sudden. So that after my brother is born, I will have enough energy to give him a little care in all aspects. Yesterday, my brother called me and asked me if I could lend him some money. He wanted to apply for a fitness card. There was no doubt that his intermittent fever had returned. Not long ago, he wanted to go abroad, so he quickly signed up for an English training class and bought a lot of English materials. However, within a few days, he no longer mentioned learning English. Later, he wanted to learn music and practice guitar, so he asked me to borrow 5,000 yuan as a sponsorship fund. Within two weeks, I saw information about him reselling guitars in WeChat Moments. Now he wants to exercise again. I asked him when he last exercised. He said: I didn’t know last time, but once I applied for the card, it was right away. I asked: How much does it cost? He said: Twelve thousand a year, you lend it to me first, and I will pay it back to you immediately after I graduate and make money. I said: You are about to graduate and your job position has not yet been decided. It would be a waste to apply for an annual card. He said: I am serious this time. I think I will be able to persevere to the end, and the more I invest, the more motivated I will be. Sister, aren\’t you at work? It shouldn\’t be a problem if you lend me some. I asked: Didn’t you sell your guitar? You should still have some money left. You can apply for a monthly card to experience it first. He said: Well, well, I bought a gift for my girlfriend. You lend it to me first, and it’s not like I won’t return it to you. At worst, I’ll write you an IOU. I suddenly became emotional and said: I am at work, but don’t you know that I have only been at work for a few months? I have to spend money to live and eat outside, and the rent is required to be paid three times a day. In order to pay for this, I am still in debt! what about you? How many times have you asked me for money this year? I\’m really gone. Can you try other sports first, not necessarily going to the gym. The younger brother was unhappy after hearing this and said: Other sisters know how to love their younger brothers, why are you like this, valuing a little money more than your life? You are just selfish! Forget it if you don’t want to borrow it! So many excuses. After saying that, he hung up the phone directly. Although he gave up borrowing money from me, I didn\’t feel relieved. So many years of experience tell me that as long as he is upset because of me, I will never have an easy life. Sure enough, within half an hour, my mother called me. She asked me what was going on and what the quarrel between the two siblings was. When you are away from home, as a sister, don’t you know how to take care of your brother? Your brother has not been active since he was a child and is weak. This time it is rare for him to want to exercise. Why don\’t you just give me some support? You have to pour cold water on me. Don\’t you just wish your brother was weaker? I know you always feel that your parents prefer your younger brother, but you can\’t be tempted to do so. I said you are the same. I have been working for so long and I don’t know how to save some money and spend it as much as I can… Mom’s words are like a machine gun, and she keeps talking non-stop. She had no intention of listening to me. I have become accustomed to it over the years and have not let my brotherBeing satisfied is the original sin. Any realistic reason I give will be an excuse. After so many years, I deeply understand this logic. But I still couldn\’t control my tears. In midsummer in Wuhan, the cicadas’ chirping is disturbing. I stayed in the rented room and my clothes were soaked with sweat. The power just went out for a while, and I was reminded that there was only the last 50 kilowatt-hours of electricity left in the electricity card. I no longer dare to turn on the air conditioner, but life still has to go on, right? Ever since he was little, his younger brother has always been given priority whether it’s food or play. One time my younger brother was sick, and the doctor told him not to eat raw or cold food. Grandma still left him the biggest piece of watermelon. Although my elders will also love me, that will be after my younger brother is satisfied first. In order to take care of my younger brother more conveniently, I was still left at home when I reached school age. I have to wait a year to go to school with my younger brother. I carry his schoolbag when he goes to school and clean for him during the day. But when I was bullied by boys, he never stood up. He is used to being loved, but he doesn\’t know that he also needs to love others. Because someone gives in and many things are done for him, he never knows how to be independent and thinks that many things are actually effortless and there is no need to put in too much effort. Relying on his own intelligence, he studied well in the first few years of elementary school and became the favorite of his parents and grandparents. But as long as you don\’t pay attention, you won\’t be able to persist in studies for long by relying on cleverness. His studies have plummeted since junior high school. At that time, my parents asked me to supervise his homework, but he couldn\’t listen to me. When he talked a little too much, he complained to his parents that I bullied him. He lazily finished junior high school, and after the high school entrance examination, he didn\’t even get into the worst high school in our city, so he had to choose to repeat his studies. And I got the best focus. My parents were also happy for me during the summer vacation that year, but they mostly advised me not to be proud. It just means not to \”show off\” in front of your younger brother, for fear of damaging his self-confidence. Of course I could understand this wisely, and I suppressed all my light. I kept a low profile and studied hard, and I was admitted to a prestigious 985 school in the college entrance examination. But he was only good enough for the junior college line. Because he is used to others giving him a little concession, he always seems to have difficulty in interpersonal communication. No one would spoil him outside, and he always felt that others were unfriendly. Because of his arrogant personality, others don\’t like to play with him. The only activity I like is staying at home and playing games. I thought that when I was far stronger than him, I wouldn\’t care if others asked me to give in to him. Because you have so much, you don’t care about giving up some. But if no one has ever put you at the center of your life since you were a child, and you have never felt loved, you will never be able to make up for anything you have when you grow up. Some only children envy me for having a younger brother. And I envy them that they can have what they like without having to give it away unconditionally. You don\’t have to bear the stigma of being \”selfish\” when you have something that should belong to you. As a sister, you have to give in to your brother; if you are taller, let your brother eat more; since you are already at work, you have to take care of your brother more;… I have been used to hearing 10,000 reasons for humility since I was a child, and gradually I can\’t find any anymore. Get a little bit of the urge to fight. If people keep giving in, they will give up all their tempers and ideas. When I was in college, a boy pursued me. heThe conditions are good in all aspects, and I am very excited. But I still rejected him because my best friend told me more than once that she only had him in her heart. I have always been very sensitive to distinguishing who belongs to whom and dare not accept things that do not seem to belong to me. Moreover, I have learned to hide my desires since I was a child and do not dare to fight for them. After graduating from college, I finally got the long-awaited job offer. My family thought the company was too far away, so it would be better for a girl to work near home. I hate my parents\’ interference in my life, but I don\’t dare to follow my own ideas. I have become accustomed to not creating conflicts, and obedience has become instinctive. When a person begins to give in from a young age, she can easily give up her own personality and vitality. It seems that only by giving everything you have to others can you get the chance to live in peace with the world. I found that since I gave up those good things, a lot of weakness and inferiority took advantage of it. They dissolved in my blood and stayed with me throughout my life. I thought that as long as I worked harder and did better, I could get out of the cage. But the negative things that seep into your heart will always make you afraid to fight for opportunities at critical times, and all your efforts will be discounted. Over the years, I have met many older children who learned to be \”second parents\” from an early age. They all appear generous and mature. Even if they encounter troubles, they will pretend to be calm and calm. But when I see them alone, I can still read the loneliness in their backs.