How about taking care of the children by yourself and letting your mother-in-law enjoy her old age in peace?

In \”Weekend Parents\”, the grandmother of Xuanxuan, the weekend baby, is an intellectual. She wants to live her own life and is not willing to take care of her grandchildren. She moved out as soon as her son got married, and she didn\’t want to live with the children. She didn\’t want to wash, cook, and clean up the housework for her son and his wife, or help her son take care of her grandson. Instead, she wanted to live her own life and fell in love at dusk. The child was sick that day and she was only allowed to take care of him for one day occasionally. She made excuses to refuse. However, daughter-in-law Jiani did not have any conflicts with her mother-in-law because of this. Her parents were helping to take care of the children. She had never complained about her mother-in-law not helping her take care of the children. The elderly have the right to pursue happiness. The real reason why my mother-in-law didn\’t help with the child was because of her son\’s partiality. The employer gave him travel benefits to Thailand, and her son asked her father-in-law and mother-in-law to go there, but she was not allowed to go. The daughter-in-law takes care of the children. She only saw her son\’s partiality, but did not see the dedication of the children\’s grandparents to the children. The children would of course be closer to whomever helped more. How did daughter-in-law Jiani handle this matter? He didn\’t care about her mother-in-law\’s pettiness and ignorance. Instead, she defended her mother-in-law in front of her husband and helped her husband and mother-in-law resolve the misunderstanding between them. The mother-in-law in the TV series is well-educated. Although she does not help her son take care of the children, she is still considerate and courteous and does not interfere too much in the life of the young couple. In reality, many mothers-in-law help take care of the children, but because of their three views With different lifestyles and habits, how many family conflicts will arise if mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live under the same roof? If your mother-in-law doesn\’t take care of the children, do you have to feel resentful that she doesn\’t help you? Maybe everyone has different requirements for their mother-in-law. Your mother-in-law is no longer here to take care of the children, and you blame her for being cold, heartless, and unhelpful. If she really comes to take care of her, all kinds of conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will pile up and explode. Family disharmony will do more harm to the marriage than the hard work of raising children by yourself. In recent days, the father-in-law and mother-in-law of my best friend Xiao C have come. The weather is nice and the spring flowers are blooming. She has been thinking about where to let her father-in-law and mother-in-law go to play. From Monday to Friday, she and her husband have to work, so they can go to the park and enjoy the scenery by themselves. Enjoy the flowers and listen to the opera. Or go to a neighbor\’s house to chat with peers about home affairs, or just watch TV at home. After she and her husband have rested on the weekend, the whole family will go to the mountains to play together. But the diligent father-in-law and mother-in-law didn\’t do what she expected. My mother-in-law took apart all the quilts and mattresses in the house, washed them, sewed them all, dried them, and put them away. My father-in-law gave the house a big cleaning, and every corner was cleaned. She thought they were here for vacation, but her parents-in-law thought they should help the children with work when they came here. Just like she thinks that raising children is her and her husband\’s business, not the responsibility and obligation of her grandparents. However, they only want to shine and do their best to help their children. Just like a few years ago, they had to help Little C raise his grandson. To this day, she sometimes regrets not insisting on taking care of the children by herself. In other words, I didn’t insist on my idea at that time and let my parents-in-law take care of the child for a while. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good, and the parents-in-law help take care of the children. The young coupleConcentrate on work and everyone is happy, how wonderful. But in fact, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in many families is not good, such as between Little C and her mother-in-law a few years ago. The first three years after giving birth are the most difficult days in a woman\’s life. Especially Little C, who has dreamed of traveling around the world like Sanmao since she was a child, and has never thought of becoming a mother. Therefore, when the baby came to her side, she was at a loss and suffered from postpartum depression. But no matter how hard it is, you are still the mother of the child. The responsibilities and obligations belong to you, not the grandmother of the child. Therefore, as early as when she was pregnant, she found a nanny early, and when she was in confinement, she found a confinement nanny. Her mother has not retired yet and cannot help her. And her relationship with her mother-in-law has never been very good. Through several interactions with my mother-in-law, I came to understand that we really couldn’t get along. In this case, she told her mother-in-law: Mother-in-law, you can enjoy your old age in peace, and I can take care of the children by myself. But the mother-in-law is worried, that is her grandson, how can she trust others to take care of her? Besides, if she stayed in her hometown, her relatives and friends would ask her why she didn’t go take care of her grandson? The strong mother-in-law and the glass-hearted daughter-in-law live together, and the result is that the relationship becomes increasingly tense. Little C felt aggrieved, having to work and take care of her children at the same time, while being disliked by her mother-in-law. My mother-in-law is even more aggrieved. She helps you take care of the child and has to watch your face here, which is all kinds of dissatisfaction. He wanted to take the child to his hometown to raise him, but Xiao C and her husband refused. They lived together stumblingly for a year, and she couldn\’t express how much harm the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law caused her during that period. She finally made up her mind to take care of the children by herself. I work and take care of my children at the same time. Although this kind of life is hard, I feel relaxed in my heart. She told me a few days ago: Looking back now, I hate myself so much at that time. I still remember what I said to her at that time: In the past few years, you have used your mother-in-law to torture me a lot. Every time I chat with Little C, she accuses her mother-in-law. As friends, we all feel tortured by her mother-in-law, let alone her? Even if she is like this, I believe her mother-in-law\’s feelings are no better than those of Little C. Regarding the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I don’t want to say who is right or wrong, who is right or wrong. I can only say that the positions are different, the angles are different, and the personalities are incompatible. If they get along, they should get along. If they don’t, they should avoid living together. Little C said that at that time, because of her mother-in-law, she really wanted to get divorced, but she felt sorry for her husband and children. During the period when my mother-in-law helped take care of the children, she was indeed able to concentrate on work and make more money, but the family was not harmonious and everyone in the family had a hard time. Although it is harder and more tiring to take care of it by yourself, after all, you will not be stuck in the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law all day long and consume yourself. What\’s more, because the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law affects the marriage and leads to divorce, wouldn\’t it be worth the loss? After all, wouldn\’t it be a good thing if the mother-in-law enjoys her old age in peace and takes care of her own children?