How do you tell if your kindergarten children are doing well? Pay attention to these 3 “conversation skills” every day

Parents who have children in kindergarten are very concerned about whether their children are doing well in kindergarten. There are even many \”questioning strategies for kindergarten children\” on the Internet, but the results may not be particularly good. This is because children express for the purpose of sharing, while adults ask with purpose, and there are many differences. What children share is their mood, and what parents are eager to understand is what happened. \”Mom, Mom, I miss you so much! When I went to bed in kindergarten today, I wanted to cry just thinking about you.\” Even in the middle class, my two children arrive in kindergarten. After school, he would \”pounce\” on me and say something like this. Of course, if they have clay toys, small stickers, etc. they can’t wait to share their results with me. But when I went to the kindergarten to pick up the two children and asked them how they were doing, their teacher would say something like: \”The two children are very good at eating, but they are not disciplined enough.\” The teacher\’s expression is actually typical \”adult thinking\”, and naturally we as parents are the same. Long-term social rules and experience have made us familiar with a set of rules and consciousness of \”getting along with the rules\”, \”getting along with others\”, and \”living in the collective\”. Kindergartens do not have to hold classes in a serious manner. They just use games, group activities, eating on time, sleeping on time… to let children understand concepts such as \”group communication\” and \”public rules\”. Therefore, children often tell us about their moods, achievements, etc., and the so-called \”process\” (such as what they ate, what time they went to bed, what they played in kindergarten…) are not the focus of their attention. Adults and children think completely differently, and naturally the words they say are also completely different. Letting children practice \”verbal resistance\” at home is as important as \”physical resistance\”. Before my two children entered kindergarten, I was like many parents: I was very worried about my children being bullied. So I have been telling my children: Don’t hit others, but if someone comes to mess with you, you must fight back, fight back, and tell the teacher! Not long after the small class started, my younger brother had a conflict with a child in the class. After school, I asked him what happened? The child said to me very proudly: A classmate grabbed me with his hand! I\’ll catch him too! Mom, Mom! I fought back just like you said! He fucked me, and I fucked him too! But when I asked him in detail, who is this classmate? When you are \”fighting\” for something, the child is \”confused\”, but he is still immersed in the pride of: \”I am just like my mother said, I resisted!\” As for the so-called telling the teacher, my child chose to tell the childcare teacher, but the head teacher was \”ignorant\” to the matter. It wasn\’t until they went to class the next day that the two children stretched out their hands at the same time and discovered that both were \”covered with scars.\” As for why they were injured or why they were fighting, neither child could tell. At this time, I deeply realized that in addition to teaching children to resist, I also need to teach them to \”speak clearly.\” \”Teacher, xx didn\’t let me play with the ball, so he hit me. It hurts!\” \”Teacher, I want to eat this, but I\’m not full.\”Let the children practice the sentence pattern of \”name + thing + result\” repeatedly, and let the children keep saying it when they have the opportunity at home, so that they can say it in kindergarten – at least when our parents or teachers ask about the situation, we will Know what\’s going on. Make an appointment with your child for a \”listening time\”, and pay more attention to the details of your child\’s \”nonsense\”. Children usually like to share all kinds of interesting kindergarten stories with their parents after school: for example, I got a little red flower, I was praised, I paid I went to a good friend, and then tried my best to say \”88, goodbye\” to my good friend… But when I picked up the child, I almost had no energy to listen – I often had to pay attention to the parents and vehicles picking up the child on one side, and hold hands on the other After children leave kindergarten, they really can\’t \”do three things at once\”! At this time, the child\’s speech is \”ineffective\”, and we look \”absent-minded\” and \”answer the question\”. The child can naturally feel the perfunctory behavior of the adults, so we choose a good time to chat with the child about kindergarten. Maybe better than rushing. Before going to bed at night, talk to your child about kindergarten. When your child chats about kindergarten at home, you might as well ask a few more questions in his interest. When your child feels wronged and cries, listen to him or make him happy. If you cry, hold on and ask why… In short, choosing to \”communicate heart-to-heart\” at that moment when you have plenty of time and are relaxed is definitely much better than asking questions like a duck on the way to and from school. Like my two children said: You are not allowed to interrupt when you are talking! You have been criticized! I\’m so awesome, I even helped my classmates move the bench… I know the child\’s situation in the kindergarten from the side, so it\’s better to follow the topics the child said, chat more with the child, and exercise the child\’s brain in \”small talk\” Speech ability. Okay, these are some of my experiences. Hope it\’s useful to you!