How to be a good and qualified father

Director Ang Lee once said: \”Being a father and a husband does not mean that I can naturally gain their respect. You still have to earn their respect every day, and you have to meet a certain standard. This It’s one of the reasons why I don’t slack off.” It’s not that after you become a father physically, your children will naturally kiss you, love you and respect you. How can I become a good and qualified father? Raising Boys Collector\’s Edition PDF download [on the bestseller list for 15 consecutive years] People\’s Daily once gave 10 suggestions, which are worth sharing with all fathers and collecting them for repeated reading. The first step to being a good father is to be your child\’s childhood playmate, understand his imagination, and appreciate his innocence and romance. Feng Zikai had seven children, all of whom were outstanding. He has loved playing with his children since he was a child. In the eyes of the world, many of the \”naughty behaviors\” of children are the children\’s unique creativity and imagination. You can ask for the roof of the house to be removed to make it easier to watch airplanes; you can ask for flowers and plants to grow on the bed and butterflies to fly, just for fun; you also need to put shoes on the barefoot stool… He will not interfere with the children\’s \”randomness\”. I won’t remind my children to “be careful”. On the contrary, he will bend down, enter the child\’s world, play with him and accompany him crazy. This is not indulgence, but wisdom that educates and entertains. Psychologist Piaget said that childhood is a critical period for children\’s cognitive development, especially their daily activities, and it is also the best way to educate them. When playing with his children, the father\’s unique spirit of adventure and exploration can release the child\’s nature, stimulate the child\’s desire to explore, and awaken more possibilities in the child. A father who is neither old nor young and full of childlike innocence is the greatest luck for his children. One father loved drinking and would go to the town pub every day for a drink. One day it was snowing heavily, and he walked to the tavern as usual. Suddenly, he found that someone seemed to be following him behind him. Looking back, his son, who was under 8 years old, was following his footsteps and said very excitedly: \”Dad, the snow is so thick, I am walking on your footprints!\” His son\’s words made him excited. His heart was refreshed. From that day on, he no longer went to the pub to drink. Instead, he went into the town library to read. Many educational problems seem to be caused by children, but their \”roots\” lie in adults. If you lie on the sofa and play with your mobile phone every day, what you will get is a child who lies on the sofa playing with his mobile phone and watching videos. If you can\’t afford to stay up until midnight every morning, what you will gain will be a child whose days and nights are reversed and his years are wasted. Try to be a learning father, because example is more effective than reprimand. The father is the \”significant other\” in the child\’s life and the child\’s first role model. A father\’s tenacity, tenacity, and sense of responsibility, each of these labels, will become the best textbook for his children. Just like Dong Yuhui, he has thanked his father many times from being ignored to becoming popular all over the Internet. \”I am becoming more and more like him. It was my father who influenced my values.\” In his eyes, his father, who was born as a farmer, was like a wise man who led him through countless darkest moments. When he collapsed, he told himself: I can\’t be blind. My father has suffered much more than me. He didn\’t complain, and I don\’t have the qualifications. When he wanted to give up, he hinted to himself: Father mentionedI am still reading a book while holding a hoe. What reason do I have to be depressed and complain? His father\’s hard work, simplicity, perseverance and optimism gave him an indomitable fighting spirit, the courage to face difficulties and the determination to never give up. A father\’s love contains great courage and strength. A father\’s attitude towards life is the best nourishment and example for his children. There is a kind of father who only gives orders to his children and suppresses them as an adult. \”I am your father, and you must listen to me in everything!\” \”What do you know, you little kid?\” Wang Zengqi once severely criticized: \”A father who wants to mold his children with his own ideal model is stupid, and Damn it. A modern, humane family must first live in peace. While parents teach people to respect each other, they must also treat each other as equals.\” If the child avoids you or is afraid of you, trembles when you mention it, and will also tremble when something happens. If I dare not tell you, then you are definitely not a good father. Loving children is an instinct, and respecting children is a kind of education. You might as well squat down more often, listen to your child\’s voice, understand your child\’s thoughts, respond to your child\’s needs, and accept your child\’s emotions. Only in this way will your children get close to you, respect you, fear you, and have endless conversations with you. A child in adolescence deliberately did not do his homework, talked back to the teacher, and even skipped school. One day, he was caught by his father in an Internet cafe. Surprisingly, his father did not beat or scold him, but just took him home and said, \”There are no children who cannot teach well, only fathers who cannot teach them! I know the problem is with me.\” On my body.\” From that day on, the father changed his schedule and insisted on picking up and dropping off his children in person every day. A few years later, the child was admitted to a key university. The father\’s patience, warmth and kindness brought a rebellious and difficult-to-manage child back from the edge of the cliff. Li Meijin once emphasized that a father must be \”kind\”. Because the father is powerful and loving, the child thinks that someone is holding him up and the sky cannot fall. She also pointed out that the father\’s love should give the child two feelings: it should give the child a kind of mind. Tell him that this matter is a big deal at the moment, but not a big deal in retrospect. I have power, but I don\’t abuse it casually. I feel like I am a friend with my children. Give your child advice and tell him what he should do. A father who treats his children as \”students\” is a stubborn father and a father who does not know how to grow. When a child says the sky is pink, he is quick to correct it; when the child is covered in mud, he is quick to stop it; when the child thinks the cat and mouse are friends, he is scolded for being childish. Many fathers are always aloof and try to use their life experience to command and control their children. But everyone knows that if a father does not have a humble attitude, he cannot educate his children well. The best fathers take their sons as their teachers. As the psychologist Piero Ferrucci said: \”As a parent, you are given the privilege of taking care of a child, and the possibility of growing up again.\” Don\’t look at your child\’s problems with colored glasses, don\’t look at them with colored glasses, The standard answer is to constrain the child\’s mind, admit his own shortcomings, and see the child\’s advantages, so that he can be a truly wise father. There is a video of a conversation between a father and his son online, which can be regarded as an excellent example of positive discipline from a father. The cause of the incident was that my brother didn’t do his homework well and was criticized by his mother.Commented. The two brothers refused to obey the discipline and believed that their mother was at fault first, so they went to their father to complain. The child was so naughty and difficult to control. The father did not scold or scold him harshly, but persuaded him with reason: \”Everything has a cause and effect. Mom only got angry when you didn\’t do things well.\” \”Everyone has things they don\’t want to do. If If we don\’t do this, society will be in chaos.\” \”Are the traffic policemen willing to stand on the road and eat exhaust fumes? Aren\’t medical staff afraid when the epidemic is at its worst? But they still have no hesitation.\”… Present facts and reason, Analyze with the child in an orderly manner until the child is convinced. Good fathers know how to teach and teach their children to understand things and distinguish right from wrong. A good education teaches children the principles and principles of doing things and being a good person in a kind and firm atmosphere. Sun Yunxiao, a well-known education expert, once told a personal experience. One evening, he took a taxi on the streets of Beijing. The driver was a middle-aged man who seemed to be in a good mood, and the two started chatting. When the driver heard that Sun Yunxiao was engaged in children\’s education, his expression was very surprised: \”What kind of children\’s education do you guys do?\” When Sun Yunxiao learned that he had a 9-year-old daughter, he asked him, \”Don\’t you care about your children\’s education?\” Who knew he He said \”Hi\” disapprovingly: \”Educating children is your damn business, I just care about making money.\” This father is exactly the epitome of most absentee fathers in China. Psychologist Hu Shenzhi once said: 90% of the shortcomings in life come from the absence of father\’s love. Please every father, please pay attention to the \”important moments\” of your child\’s growth and make him feel loved and valued. Please celebrate your child\’s birthday together; please applaud your child\’s performance; please accompany your child to his sports meeting. The father is the person who determines the character of the child and establishes the trajectory of the child\’s life. Father\’s education is indispensable and cannot be replaced. Researchers from the University of Newcastle in the UK conducted a follow-up investigation on 17,000 babies for 11 years. The results show that children who spend more time with their fathers tend to be smarter, more energetic and more sociable. No matter how rich the material is, it cannot replace the role of the father; no matter how capable the mother is, no matter how capable the mother is, it cannot replace the role of the father. There are no brilliant skills in educating children, it is just love and companionship. Don\’t think that these small things are insignificant, as they are related to the child\’s lifelong happiness and future. Psychologists once concluded that the same sentence, if spoken by the father, has 50 times the impact on the child than the mother. The father\’s mouth is the child\’s way. If you give your children blows, criticisms, and accusations, they will be destined to be filled with thorns and darkness along the way. If you give your children encouragement, praise, and affirmation, they will often reap flowers and light along the way. Some people say that what China needs education most is not its children but its parents, especially fathers. Once you have a baby, you can’t “return” it. As a father, you must be responsible to the end. A good father can realize that the way home from get off work is the way home. A good father can understand that educating children has an expiration date. A good father will strive to cultivate himself to be a role model for his children. No matter how busy a father is, he must strive to be a good father and a good leader for his children.