How to cultivate children\’s ability to resist frustration?

Children will inevitably encounter setbacks as they grow up. However, children today are generally less resistant to setbacks. Today\’s children are faced with various pressures: heavy academic work, fierce competition, delicate interactions with classmates… Without a \”flexible\” heart, they can easily be overwhelmed by pressure. In the face of setbacks and difficulties, the key to a person\’s success or failure lies in frustration resistance – the ability to deal with adversity. So, how to cultivate children\’s ability to resist frustration? They lose their temper before the building blocks are built, they cry when the teacher praises others but not themselves, they give up when they encounter difficulties in learning… When faced with setbacks, children will fall into a dead end of self-doubt and choose to complain and escape instead of overcoming breakthroughs. , this is a manifestation of the child\’s lack of resistance to frustration. Frustration resilience refers to a person\’s ability to endure and get rid of setbacks and maintain a healthy and normal psychology and behavior after suffering setbacks. Children who lack resilience are accustomed to giving up when encountering setbacks. Naturally, they will not be able to reap the doubled happiness after overcoming difficulties, and it will be difficult for them to grow. Every parent hopes that their children can handle problems calmly and calmly instead of just complaining and escaping. But how should we cultivate children\’s ability to resist frustration? Improve children\’s sense of control. Control refers to people\’s ability to respond to their surrounding environment, especially to adverse events. When facing adversity, children with a weak sense of control often choose to retreat and escape, so they often say \”I can\’t\” or \”It\’s too difficult, I can\’t do it.\” Children with a strong sense of control will take the initiative to change or adapt to their environment. , these children believe that \”Although this is a bit difficult, I will definitely learn it!\” The way to improve children\’s sense of control: let go appropriately. Children\’s weak sense of control is largely due to parents\’ over-reliance: when a child wears shoes backwards, instead of teaching the child how to wear them correctly, the parents directly help the child put them on again; when the child draws, he says, \”I can\’t draw.\” \”Mom, please help me draw.\” Instead of guiding the child step by step, parents let the child follow the drawing or directly help the child draw… Gradually, the child will be at a loss when facing difficulties. In fact, as long as parents are willing to let go of many small things in life and let their children try and make their own choices, they can continuously improve their children\’s sense of control. Recommended scientific parenting books. I really hope my parents have read this book and download the electronic version to improve their children\’s responsibility. Responsible children are willing to bear the consequences of difficult situations, which will also prompt them to take practical actions to solve the problems in difficult situations. For example, if a child is stacking blocks with other children, and one of the blocks is knocked down by someone, a child with a weak sense of responsibility may say, \”I didn\’t knock it down.\” A child with a strong sense of responsibility will take action in time: Pick up the blocks quickly. Ways to improve children\’s responsibility: Guide children to dare to take responsibility. When children make mistakes, parents should guide them to admit their mistakes and bear the consequences. Instead of making a mistake and not knowing how to solve it, start crying or even lie. Reduce the impact of frustration on children Impact refers to the impact of a setback on other aspects of life. When children with weak resistance to frustration face difficulties, they will magnify them infinitely and affect other aspects of their lives. For example, if a child does not practice well at the piano, he will start to lose his temper.Angry, I was so angry that I didn’t eat anything during dinner. Ways to reduce the impact of frustration: Identify and ease your child’s emotions. Frustration will bring negative psychological emotions to children. As parents, you need to help your children calm down under setbacks, encourage them to accept negative emotions, and reduce the impact of negative emotions. When the child encounters difficulties and is in a low mood, parents should first give the child a hug and acknowledge the child\’s emotions. \”Dad/Mom can understand that the baby is very sad right now.\” Parents should give the child time to self-relieve and process, and finally provide guidance. Children solve problems. Reduce the persistence of frustration The persistence here mainly refers to how long the child thinks the frustration will last? Children with weak frustration tolerance will prolong their frustration, find it difficult to let go, and attribute the causes of failure as permanent. For example, a child will say, \”This is too difficult, I will never learn.\” Ways to reduce the persistence of adversity: Let the child know that difficulties are temporary. When children face difficulties, parents should tell them: \”The difficulties are only temporary. As long as we face it and solve it together, it will be over soon.\” And when parents help their children analyze the reasons for the difficulties, they should not completely attribute it. For objective reasons, we need to help children find subjective reasons.