How to educate your children is how you invest in the rest of your life

I think a child\’s EQ is more important than IQ, and moral character is more important than ability. Parents mainly use two words to cultivate their children: persistence. Persist in daily life, persevere in every link, and persevere all the time. Everyone knows the principle of family education. The key is which parent can persist! Three Questions to Ask Parents If parenthood is a position, then this position is automatically held with the birth of a child and does not need to be appointed by others. The first question: At what level is your role as a parent now? The Parental Hierarchy Theory proposed by the People\’s Daily in \”Education Reform Must Start with Family Education\” has five levels. Level 1: Be willing to spend money on your children. Level 2: Be willing to spend time for your children. The third level: Parents begin to think about the goals of education. The fourth level: Parents improve and improve themselves in order to educate their children. Level 5: Parents do their best to support and encourage their children to become their best selves, and also lead by example to support their children to become their true selves. I would like to ask all parents, in addition to being willing to spend money for your children, you will also spend time for your children. Will you spend time? Do you still think about education at a higher level, think about your children’s life plans, and think about synchronous learning with your children to accompany their growth? Can you always have a growth conversation with your child? Are your thoughts in tune with your child\’s growth? I think most parents probably spend more on material things and less on spiritual things. Are we parents full of enthusiasm and dreams, are we parents scientific and rational, instead of harming our children intentionally or unintentionally and affecting their growth in the \”name of father\’s love and mother\’s love\”? The second question: Among the ten knives of modern family education, which ones have you used unintentionally and hurt your children? The first knife: too much care, which makes the children not know how to cherish; the second knife: too much nagging, which makes the children rebellious; the third knife: too much intervention, which makes the children lack autonomy; the fourth knife : Too many expectations, making the child unbearable; No. 5 knife: Too much blame, making the child lose motivation; No. 6 knife: Too much accommodation, making the child ignorant of restraint; No. 7 knife: Too much concern , causing the children to threaten their parents; the 8th knife: too much enjoyment, making the children ignorant of frugality; the 9th knife: too much satisfaction, making the children lack happiness; the 10th knife: too much pampering, making the children unable to grow . Do you think that parents will get ideal returns if they give for free? Although we pay without expecting anything in return. We must love our children, and let them feel our love. We must not let love overflow, and we must not do everything in the name of love. As children get older, parents will face more and more challenges: (1) As children grow up and reach senior grades, their physical and mental development puts forward higher requirements for tutoring; (2) Parents Unable to grow up with children, limited level and declining authority; (3) Little time to get along, reduced opportunities, lack of in-depth communication; (4) Children in the new era have an enhanced sense of independence. But no matter how big the challenge, disciplining your children will always be your business. Because you are the parent of your child, and you cannot resign or retire from your position for life. If you don\’t care before the age of 18, they will still come to trouble you after the age of 18. youThe happiness index for the rest of your life is the development of your children. Therefore, we parents and friends should not just focus on being happy now and not caring about the children. There will be constant worries in the future. As long as the children have a bad life, you will be worried about it for the rest of your life. This is what parents are! The safety education content of the first lesson of school, the complete collection of 52 episodes of Lebi Yoyo’s popular science knowledge, and the third question, have you prepared lessons in advance for the parent-teacher meeting? The parent-teacher meeting is a big gathering of educators. Parents are the partners of our teachers in educating their children. How can we jointly educate your children if our partners are not here? If you don’t care about your own children, how can you expect others to care? The teacher can be attentive, but the effect is far from satisfactory. Parents should prepare lessons in advance and complete at least four steps: (1) Arrange your own work and attend on time. If you really can\’t get away due to busy work, you should explain the situation to the class teacher, ask for leave, and invite the teacher to communicate alone in the future. Don\’t miss the opportunity. (2) Before going to the meeting, you should have a serious talk with your child if you have the opportunity, have an individual conversation with the teacher in charge with questions, take the initiative to report the child\’s situation to the teacher, solicit the teacher\’s opinions and suggestions, and raise all questions and worries. Discuss with the teacher. (3) Listen carefully to reports from school leaders or teachers on the school situation, and focus on understanding the progress of school work and the development trend of the educational situation, so as to clarify the requirements of the school and teachers for the children. (4) After returning, have a serious heart-to-heart talk with your child, exchange opinions, study improvement measures with your child, and formulate next-step goals. Teachers have a heavy teaching load and limited energy. Therefore, parents should take the initiative to contact the school, report and understand their children\’s performance to the teacher in a timely manner, so that the school and family can work together to educate their children well. Four pieces of advice for parents. What should we as parents pay attention to? 1. It is important to believe in and cooperate with school teachers. The relationship between teachers, parents, and students is like an isosceles triangle. The lower two corners of the triangle are parents and teachers. The length of teachers and parents can determine the height of a student\’s life. Students are the pinnacle. Regardless of the method or content of activities, they must be centered on students and students. This is the pursuit of our school! Parents should not criticize teachers or school regulations in front of their children. This is not conducive to children\’s awareness of rules and will increase their resistance and speculation. If parents don\’t respect teachers, your children\’s respect for teachers will be no better, and their learning results will not be good. We are partners in education with parents, and the partnership time is when the children are in school. Let those who understand education engage in education. No one should become a vulnerable group, but no one can override the strong group. Of course, if parents feel there is any problem, they can communicate with the school, but they must uphold the school\’s regulations and the teacher\’s authority in front of their children. 2. Be strategic in your children’s education. Do you know that your children are growing and changing? Do you know what the child is thinking right now? Can you communicate with your children? Many parents are eloquent in society and at work, but because they do not know parent-child communication skills, they cannot speak or sit together with their children. How to talk to children? Here are a few suggestions: First, talk about the situation. As the saying goes, \”To lead a cow, lead it by its nose.\”\”Children, you have to hit the snake seven inches.\” If the parent fails to grasp the point of the conversation and asks him in general terms all day long that he should be like this and that, and repeatedly tells him to \”study hard\” as soon as they meet, and talks about clichés all day long, the child will It\’s weird if you don\’t bother! If parents usually observe more, actively communicate with teachers, and go to the school more often to understand some real and specific situations, then once the conversation is held, the content of \”something at such a time, a certain day, a certain month, a certain time and a certain place\” will be conclusive and specific. Once the student\’s acupuncture point is tapped, he will know that you are really locking him up and will not make excuses. If he continues to talk, the effect will be completely different. The second is to focus on talking. Students are usually busy studying, and there are heavy tasks outside and people are tired. How can he sit with you calmly when you are nagging, tired, and have no breathing room when you go home. Therefore, you should always look at it, keep it in your heart, pay attention to the occasion, and find a person who doesn\’t like you in a week or a period of time. The fixed time and place of interference focus the problems. Parents prepare lessons in advance and sit with their children solemnly. If they don\’t say anything, if they want to say something, they focus on saying it to the point at once, with strength and depth. The third is to talk about problems. Growth. It is impossible for a child in childhood to have shortcomings, and the shortcomings are manifested in many aspects. Don’t expect to be comprehensive when talking to your children. It is enough to focus on one or two problems to make breakthroughs. Don’t talk about other problems when the time is not ripe. Talk more and face-to-face. Being too broad will have poor results. We need to discuss matters as they arise. Children are most afraid of bringing up old issues, comparing themselves to other children, making random connections, and making subjective assumptions. In short, understand the child from his perspective, respect him as an equal, and talk with reason. Convince him with things, point out the problems and give him enough face. Find the shortcomings and be good at affirming them. Believe in the children and give them opportunities to grow and develop. Only then will the children slowly understand the parents’ difficulties and slowly open up. 3. Need Understand the three basic educational theories. Many of our parents and friends have good intentions and good intentions, but the training goals are blind, the educational concepts are lagging, the educational methods are random, and the educational knowledge is poor. Want to To be a qualified parent, I suggest that parents and friends learn about the following educational theories. (1) Zone of Proximal Development Theory: Don’t always compare your children with other people’s children! There are two levels of student development: one is the student’s The current level refers to the level of problem-solving that can be achieved during independent activities; the other is the student\’s possible development level, which is the potential gained through teaching. The difference between the two is the zone of proximal development. To put it simply One thing is what I often say: “Look at the starting point, compare the progress. \”Each child has differences in knowledge, ability, emotional intelligence and IQ. Every child just needs to be the best version of himself. We should compare vertically, and the children should compare themselves with themselves, and compare today with the past. As long as the current self is better than the past self, You should affirm yourself and encourage your children. The overall score is not ideal, and the progress of a single subject must be affirmed. If this piece of knowledge is not good, another piece of knowledge must be solved relative to the past. Only then can the goal be visible and within reach of the child. If you have hope, work hard and pick peaches with a little jump. (2) Stress and performance theory: Don’t put too much pressure on your children. Stress and work performance form an inverted U.type of relationship. Too little pressure is not conducive to motivating people, and too much pressure makes people depressed, resulting in inability to achieve high performance. Therefore, appropriate pressure is required to achieve good work performance. Who wouldn’t want to go to Peking University or Tsinghua University? But not everyone can go to Peking University and Tsinghua University. Achieve through hard work, find the feeling of success through realization, and continuously enhance your self-confidence, so that you will continue to make progress. Moderate pressure is motivation. Improper pressure is a reactionary force. The greater the pressure, the greater the motivation. Learn to increase or reduce pressure appropriately depending on the individual. The reason why many of our children\’s grades are unstable is either because their parents put too much pressure or they put too much pressure on themselves, which can lead to swings. The roller-coaster results are not what parents need. Watching movies in this state is very exciting and can kill your children. Every time you set goals for your children, they must be realistic. (3) The theory of nature and nurture in education: a golden phoenix cannot fly from a henhouse; an ugly duckling is not originally hatched from a duck egg. The influence on human quality includes genetic factors, environmental factors, human subjective initiative, etc. The nativity theory emphasizes heredity and the role of innate genetic factors in human cognitive development, while the nurture theory emphasizes the important role of environment, education, and acquired subjective efforts in human cognitive development. The reason why I remind parents of innate theory is not to emphasize absoluteness, but to warn parents: a golden phoenix cannot fly out of a hen\’s nest; the ugly duckling was not originally hatched from a duck egg, but a swan egg that accidentally fell into a duck\’s nest. No matter how far a child will go, parents must first examine themselves. Their study status back then and their current efforts in life are different for parents, not to mention their children! Stop placing all hope of transcendence on your children. We must learn to increase pressure, reduce pressure appropriately, never lose pressure, and use pressure scientifically. Don\’t hand over the pressure of three generations to your children. Sometimes we, as parents, always have a desire to compare and let our children compare with other children. As a result, the relationship between the two generations becomes tense. I would like to advise parents, why don\’t you compare yourself with other parents? If you can\’t do something yourself, do you place your hopes on the next life and expect your children to make up for it? A little too selfish. So now, for the growth of their children, parents must restrain themselves and grow themselves. For example, if you have a positive attitude towards life, love your work, like to learn new knowledge, etc., you will complain all day long, wander around, and expect your children to work hard and be enterprising. This kind of teaching is not convincing. If the child\’s temporary development is not as good as we expected, we should stay calm, encourage him more positively, and don\’t express our disappointment in front of the child, otherwise he will be discouraged and broken faster than you! Expectations can grow slowly as the child progresses, but expectations cannot be unlimited. Sometimes it is more effective to keep this expectation in your heart than to talk about it. First of all, we ensure that we have a child who grows up healthy and happy in body and mind. 4. Children grow up watching their parents’ backs. A harmonious family is more important than anything else. Parents who value family education are responsible for the healthy development of students throughout their lives. He comes from a family, he grew up in a family, and he will build a higher-level family in the future. So my experience is: the relationship between husband and wife is very important. Parents are the big trees and backers of their children. Without parents, there would be no home, let alone a good growing environment. Nowadays, there are many intergenerational guardianships, and the elderly take care of the children.Children can only take care of life; children born by oneself must be raised, taught and managed by oneself. Parents should become learning parents, and their learning behavior will have a subtle effect on their children. For families with primary and secondary school students, it is best not to frequently play cards and mahjong at home, and not to be crowded with friends and drink and chat all day long. Instead, they should provide their children with a relatively quiet learning environment. Children are the continuation of our lives. No matter how vigorous we are outside, we have to return to our families in the end. Raising your own children well and paying attention to their growth can also be a career! Recommended classic book: The main content of Love Education pdf + audio. Let me talk about my thoughts on family education. Finally, as a person who has experienced it, I would like to talk about my thoughts on family education: 1. You don’t have to be excellent, but you can be very positive. 2. You can live a miserable life, but you show that you love life very much. 3. You can be ordinary, but you can\’t be too mediocre. 4. You often complain and blame others, but you expect your children to be positive, optimistic, and strive for self-improvement? 5. You are idle all day, do you expect your children to work hard and achieve success? 6. You don’t like learning and look down on teachers. Do you expect your children to desire knowledge and respect teachers? 7. Children grow up watching their parents’ backs. 8. Every successful child finds excellent factors in his parents. 9. Every child who fails has an underlying source of failure in his parents. 10. Disciplining children requires parents to be of the same mind and stand in the same position. 11. Caring for children must be rational and scientific so that they can perceive it. 12. Educating children is a career that never retires. Dear parents, hoping that your children will become successful is not just words and thoughts, but also reflected in long-term actions. Parents and friends, the process of children\’s academic growth is full of wind, rain and sunshine. We must face it calmly. There is no unchanging society, only our unchanging heart for our children. Parents and friends, what we need first is healthy, happy, and happy children, and then we need children who are adults, talents, and famous. Academic performance is not the only evaluation, look at children\’s growth and future in a diverse way. God has prepared a window for everyone who works hard, so you must choose the one that suits you best. Zhou Hong Appreciation Education Case Video Original Full Series 6VCD+mp3 Parents and friends, educating an outstanding child is investing in your own happiness for the rest of your life!