How to improve the poor parent-child relationship

Have you ever had any of the following problems? I had been talking sincerely for a long time, but the child didn\’t listen to a word. Sometimes, children are rarely in high spirits and want to say something, but we chatter them to death with a few words. As time goes by, the children become less and less willing to communicate with us, and the parent-child relationship becomes worse and worse. In fact, as written in the book \”Parents\’ Language\”: \”The socioeconomic status of parents does not affect the future of their children. The language used by parents when talking to their children is the most critical influencing factor.\” , \”People\’s Daily\” advises parents to get rid of these ten \”toxic\” ways of speaking. It is recommended that parents read the following content three times. The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! Starting today: I will learn to accept my child without comparing him to others. Because I know that every child is a unique star. He just needs to discover his shining points, and he doesn\’t have to be perfect in everything. To love children is to know how to appreciate their strengths, help them see their unique value, and become a better version of themselves. Therefore, from now on, I will discover the advantages of a child every week and express my appreciation to the child every day. I believe that only children who grow up with recognition and affirmation can grow into a confident and happy person. Starting today: I will no longer say words that scare my children and fill them with fear. Because I know this is what parents do when they are impatient and want to take shortcuts. Doing so may be effective in the short term, but in the long term, it will not only lose the child\’s trust, but also destroy the child\’s sense of security. Because in a child\’s world, his parents are everything to him. Whether he is safe and stable needs to be confirmed from his parents\’ words and eyes. Therefore, when I get along with my children in the future, I must have two things in mind: patience and attentiveness. Patiently accept your child\’s emotions and solve every problem he has with your heart. I believe that with my warm acceptance, my children will grow up to be brave and independent. Starting today: I will no longer talk about complaints and dissatisfaction and let my children live in guilt and flattery. Because I know that complaining is that I use my children as emotional trash cans to vent my long-accumulated negative emotions. However, when parents often send out pessimistic and negative signals, the child\’s world will also become cloudy. When he encounters a ravine in life in the future, he will habitually face it pessimistically and negatively. Therefore, I have to separate subjects well and not let my children pay for my problems. I also have to remind myself from time to time to express my emotions in the right way and to ask for my needs instead of complaining. Finally, I have to take good care of myself. Because I am the source of everything. Only when my heart is full can I inject positive energy into my children. Starting today: I will no longer stand high and suppress my children with cold denial. Because I know that every disparagement I say is a curse to the child. If I say that he is not conscious, he will procrastinate and dawdle even more, and will be unable to complete his homework; if I say that he is unsatisfactory, he will really feel that he is ignorant and inferior to others. Hidden in my words are my children’s future and my positive attitude toward them.Expectation is the key to unlocking his growth. Therefore, I have to learn to look at my child\’s problems from another angle: when my child does not do well, I will tell myself that now is his opportunity to grow. I must first affirm his attempts, then point out his problems and give him some advice. Confidence also gives guidance, so that children can grow more resiliently. From today on, I will not say anything disappointing to my child when he is happy and has a sense of accomplishment. Because I know that only in positive emotions can children feel their own energy and live a life with a more sense of control. Wise parents know how to be the nobles of their children. Find ways to help children succeed, experience joy, and accumulate energy for the next departure. Therefore, I want to sincerely celebrate every success of my child. Let the child describe the process, share the details, and enjoy every highlight moment of life with him. Starting today, if my child wants my help, I will never push him away with cold words and leave him alone. Because I know that this kind of emotional neglect is not corporal punishment, but it is a colder punishment than corporal punishment. It\’s like scratching a child with a dull knife. No blood will bleed, but the pain is real. Indifference will not defeat children, but it will drive them away. They will build a high wall in their hearts to protect themselves while also isolating their parents. Therefore, I have to squat down, truly enter the child\’s world, see the uneasiness deep in his heart, and listen attentively to every voice he makes. Because I am the most important person to my child. When the storm hits his little world, the only one he can rely on is me. From today on, I will learn to have a sense of propriety when talking to my children and respect their privacy. I believe that the more respectful my attitude towards my children is, the more willing they will be to get close to me; when I lean down and communicate with them on an equal footing, the more likely my children will be to open up to me. And the behavior of peeking at my children\’s diaries and mobile phones is actually me committing infringement in the name of love. It turns love into surveillance and snooping, and in the end, what is left to parents is the closed heart of their children. Therefore, from today on, I will respect my child\’s privacy and give him space; respect his right to speak and treat each other as equals; respect his choice and support and help. Only when parents know how to be appropriately close and independent of each other can their children get better and better. From today on, I will no longer try to control my children by saying things like \”I am your mother, can I still hurt you?\” Because I know that growth requires a sense of autonomy. Only children who have experienced independent choices will experience the joy of active growth and be inspired to have strong self-driving force. And those children who live under the control of their parents are like being imprisoned by shackles, losing their vitality at a young age. I believe that when parents take one step back, their children can take ten steps forward. Letting go is a subject that all parents must overcome. Therefore, I have to learn to overcome my desire to control: give more choices when speaking instead of giving instructions; give more suggestions instead of direct requests. No matter big or small, as long as it is a child\’s matter, let him participate in it and make decisions with us, because the most important mission of parents is to help their children become the king of their own land. From today on, if my child makes a mistake, I willI refuse to use offensive words to irritate or humiliate my children. Because I know that no matter how naughty a child is, he or she has self-esteem. Parents\’ curses will be like an invisible sharp knife, crushing their young hearts and causing a lifetime of hidden pain. Every child who makes mistakes is an angel waiting to be redeemed. My tolerance will turn into a ray of breeze, blowing away the guilt and uneasiness in the child\’s heart; my understanding will become the confidence for the child\’s growth, helping him face his mistakes and grow quickly. Therefore, if my child makes a mistake, I will try to restore myself to a child, use his thoughts to think about the problem, and analyze the reason for his mistake. Finally, point out his problems in a gentle tone and give constructive suggestions. Because I know that I must always stand with the child and defeat the problem, rather than stand with the problem and defeat the child. From today on, I will pay more attention to my tone when talking to my children, and I will never use sarcastic or mocking words to stimulate my children\’s sensitive nerves. Because I know that for a child, he would rather be stabbed by a cactus than hear the cynicism of an adult. A casual \”joke\” from a parent may be a sharp arrow shot into the child\’s heart, making him flinch. Therefore, when facing my child, I have to always remind myself: I cannot speak unscrupulously just because he is my child. When a child makes a mistake or is naughty, I want to think of him as my friend or colleague. I use the tone I use to treat my friends to express my concern; I use the attitude I use to treat my colleagues to make them feel understood and tolerated. Only my warm care can help children settle their hearts and gain the courage to start over. There is a saying that every child is dancing on the tip of his parents\’ tongue. 14600 Vocabulary collins cobuild English Grammar Encyclopedia Download PDF version In life, we inevitably have to face various anxieties. When facing children, there will inevitably be times when we speak without hesitation. But we need to always remember: if parents speak well, the path of children\’s growth can be bright and smooth, and the bridge of parent-child relationship can be built smoothly. I hope that in the future, every word we say can become a gentle and continuous trickle, pushing children forward fearlessly. Click \”Like\” and encourage all parents.