How to make children conscious and self-disciplined

Some parents complained to me: their children have no sense of self-consciousness at home after school during the summer vacation. Just waiting for school to start, someone will take over the devil at home. Many parents are confused about how to help their children establish a good routine and develop good living and study habits during the summer vacation. These seven rules for raising children cover many aspects such as children\’s sense of security, learning management, and emotional health. They can help you unlock the code of your child\’s growth and raise a happy, confident, and self-disciplined child. 01 Know how to \”pay attention\” to change the child\’s lifelong sense of security. \”Why do children get emotional when they go to kindergarten?\” \”What should I do if my child is afraid of the dark and can\’t sleep?\” In fact, every child\’s sense of security is determined by the \”timely response\” of his parents. And established. When children are still very young, they can only judge whether they receive enough love from the reactions of those around them. When you feel secure enough, you can free up your energy to do more things. If parents do these four things well, a sense of security will accompany their children throughout their lives. 1. Stability of caregivers and growth environment. If the child is still relatively young, try to have a fixed caregiver, preferably the parents themselves, and do not change caregivers frequently. 2. The caregiver’s emotional attention. When communicating with your child, pay attention to your body language. Don\’t talk to others or play on your mobile phone while perfunctory. This will make him feel ignored. When saying \”good night\” to your child, you might as well add \”Mom loves you.\” In addition, you can\’t say it too much, like \”What\’s wrong, baby? Mommy is here, Mommy loves you.\” Parents\’ love will plant the seeds of \”stable objects\” in children\’s hearts. 3. Stable and harmonious relationship between husband and wife. The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! If you feel your parents\’ negative emotions for a long time, you will form catastrophic thinking: thinking that the world is full of unrest and everything will develop for the worst. Only when children feel that there is stability, safety and harmony behind them can they have the courage to truly move into the larger world. 4. Handle emotional issues properly. No matter whether the child is crying or showing vulnerability, parents should not push him away. When the child is young, he will not comfort himself. As long as he feels anxious, he will be irritable and cry. Mothers need to help them calm down: pick them up, comfort them, help them relax, know how to carefully ask their children about their current emotions, and provide comfort step by step. Only later will she know how to comfort herself. 02 Only when children learn to let their father intervene can they learn to explore their father\’s companionship, which should last throughout the child\’s childhood. A study in the United States shows that if fathers spend more time chatting and reading with their children, their children will rarely have behavioral problems and learning disabilities after entering school, and they will rarely go astray during adolescence. Because of his father\’s guidance, children begin to become interested in the world around them, gain self-confidence, develop creativity and the ability to explore outwards. 1. Fathers play with their children to stimulate their brain potential. The father\’s sense of strength, space, and game ability are more suitable for accompanying his children in sports. Children who know how to \”play\” are better at innovating. Children who grow up in a state of \”playing well\” are not timid or dull, and are full of energy. 2. The appearance of father,Help the child and mother to psychologically separate. Most children are closer to their mothers, and the presence of their father helps the children break away from the binary relationship, establish support for outward development, and form an independent and complete personality. 3. Dad helps his children explore outwards in a healthier way. Male rationality and logic point to order, and the majesty and sense of order represented by males can easily help children establish various rules. Therefore, father\’s intervention can help children explore outside in a more healthy and reasonable way. 03 Only by daring to \”slow down\” can children develop good habits. Raising children is like leading a snail for a walk. It is a process that requires a lot of patience. Excessive anxiety and too much urging will only disrupt the rhythm of children\’s growth. Smart parents have the courage to \”slow down\”. 1. Establish a schedule with your child. Use tools such as alarm clocks and watches to \”visualize\” time, such as when to get up, when to eat, when to play with toys, and when to read, to enhance children\’s purpose in doing things and try to ensure a regular schedule. 2. Let your children experience the natural consequences of dawdling. When he loses the opportunity to do something because of dilly-dallying, he will naturally understand that he should increase his speed. 3. Use the \”order sensitive period\” to establish good habits. Instruct the child to put the toys back to their original places and put the things used in categories. Use the child\’s strict need for order to cultivate good habits in the child. 4. Assign tasks to children simply and clearly. Because the child\’s memory and understanding are still poor, when you issue a series of instructions, such as \”wipe the table, pack the school bag, put on shoes, and go out quickly\”, the child\’s first reaction is not \”I want to hurry up\”, but \”I want to hurry up\”. Which one do I want to do?” So, make the instructions clear. 04 Tell your children these 4 sentences: Children know how to make friends. Making friends is a very important theme in children’s lives. They will learn how to cherish themselves and respect others in group life. Some children will encounter setbacks in the process of making friends, such as fear that others will not play with them, or excessive compromise in relationships. This is a time when parents’ actions will be tested. 1. If the child feels wronged, teach the child how to choose. Tell the child: \”You can choose your friends.\” If the relationship is unfair, you can give up that kind of friend. The child will understand: \”Friendship is two-way. Others have the right not to play with you, and you also have the right to refuse other people\’s requests. .\” 2. If the child is unwilling to go out and make friends, it is necessary to determine whether the child is \”isolated and excluded.\” Assess whether the child lacks appropriate social skills. If the child is isolated, parents must clearly tell the child: \”If others deliberately isolate you and exclude you, no matter what the \”reason\” is, they must be wrong. Mom will always stand by you. This way.\” 3. Teach your children to take the initiative. Provide your children with opportunities to participate in a wide range of group activities. If conditions permit, invite your children\’s friends to your home, or encourage your children to attend a party, and tell your children: \”If you like a certain friend, you can bravely invite them to your home to play.\” .\” 4. Tell your children that only by strengthening themselves can they gain good friendships.. It is difficult for a person with a score of 50 to become friends with a person with a score of 90. You must tell your children: \”Only by enriching yourself can you truly attract others.\” 05 Master these 3 skills to cultivate children who study well \”No difference between first and second grade The third grade begins to differentiate between the upper and lower grades, and the gap between the fourth and fifth grades widens.\” In the education world, the \”third grade phenomenon\” is well-known. Different from the \”temporary sprint\” in the first and second grades, the third grade places higher demands on children\’s abilities. When children enter senior grades, parents should keep these three points in mind if they want their children to make steady progress in learning. 1. Set the goal smaller. Break the big goal into small goals and form specific, achievable small tasks. For example: Memorize 10 words in one day. In this way, learning will become relatively simple and children will not be rejected. When children complete small goals again and again, parents remember to reward or encourage their children, or let them rest for 10-15 minutes, and then gradually extend the time to focus on doing things at once. Only when the brain feels happy can a positive peak experience be formed. 2. Help children learn to draw mind maps. You can try to draw a mind map with your children, classify and summarize the content of the book, and sort out the outline. This can help the children understand the general knowledge framework or goals more intuitively and quickly enter the learning state. 3. Learn to repeat what you learn every day. Only when children can express knowledge in their own language can they truly understand and internalize it. 06 Develop \”exercise habits\” and gain a cheerful and lively child. Li Meijin once suggested: Don\’t let your child stay at home to study all day long, otherwise his brain will be highly excited and the cerebellum will not be stimulated. If the brain nerves are not fully excited, psychological problems will easily occur. Helping children develop the habit of exercising will be of great help to their mental state. 1. Children who love sports will win in \”concentration\”. Studies have shown that 19,000 students abroad have to run in the morning before class. Compared with their peers, they are not only healthier but also smarter. why? Because moderate-intensity exercise can help children focus, stay energetic, and learn more efficiently. 2. Children who love sports will have better psychological quality. Exercise is the renewal of muscles, and there will also be various bumps and bruises, and the child\’s willpower will also be exercised. Moreover, after children exercise, their levels of serotonin, adrenaline, and dopamine will change, which is helpful for children to release stress and stay happy. To this end, Canadian scientists have formulated the \”Parents\’ Guide to the Development of Physical Literacy in Children Aged 0-12\”: Children under 4 years old are not suitable for running and jumping too early, but they can go to parks and playgrounds more often; children aged 4-6 years old need Parents demonstrate how to run, jump, and exercise through words and deeds; after the age of 6, it is the best time for children to develop sports skills, including skiing, swimming, cycling, and playing football; between 6 and 12 years old, parents serve as role models Next, the child begins to develop his own movement patterns. 07 Learn to \”encourage\” and gain a confident child. If you want your child to be confident enough to become an independent person, you don\’t need to ask your child to be too sensible. You need a lot of support.Let the children tinker and try. Only when parents know how to \”encourage\” can their children develop the courage and ability to think and express independently. 1. Find an older role model for your children. For children, the role of role models is unparalleled. It can help girls know how to become a strong, meaningful woman; it can also help boys understand what they agree with and support, and what they care about most. 2. Give children more understanding. When children are expressing, be less \”judgmental.\” When chatting with children, preaching is the most taboo. Try your best to maintain a high level of interest in children\’s topics. You must ask more and comment less. Say more \”you\” and less \”I\”. Teach more, explain more, ask more. 3. Observe and praise your children’s hard work. Rather than praising your child\’s intelligence and talent, you need to praise your child\’s patience, perseverance and hard work. Let me share a praise model called the FFC model. Translated into Chinese, it consists of three steps: Fact + Feeling + Compare. The child\’s grades are poor, but there will always be a time when he gets a question right. You can say this: You don\’t need to be taught by your mother for this question. You got it right yourself. Your mother is very pleased. The accuracy rate now is much higher than before. Only when parents emphasize the meaning of the process can children truly enjoy it.