How to make children mentally stronger, parents remember to always say these 4 sentences

I saw a comment like this on the Internet: Children who have never been yelled at will later hit a wall in society and commit suicide because they cannot bear it. Many parents believe that children today are vulnerable because they have suffered too few blows. However, children who have been severely beaten by their parents since childhood will not become stronger mentally. On the contrary, they have poorer ability to withstand stress and are more likely to have problems. Because children who have been subjected to persecution and education since childhood have no parents to give them the confidence, they lack inner security, have low self-esteem, and are fragile. When he leaves society and encounters a bigger blow, without his parents to protect him and his spiritual support, he will easily collapse and be unable to bear it. On the contrary, parents often encourage and affirm their children, letting them know that they have an excellent side and that they are better than others, which in turn makes the children stronger and more confident. Therefore, parents may wish to say these four sentences more to make their children\’s hearts stronger and better able to withstand the beatings from society in the future. Children, I need you to remember what Professor Li Meijin said: As parents, you must learn to show weakness when educating your children. Because in a relationship, it is impossible for two equally strong people to exist at the same time. One must be strong and the other weak. If parents want their children to become strong, they must be willing to be the weak one at the appropriate time, so that the child can have the opportunity to show his strength. In the program \”Don\’t Look Down on Me\”, when Fu Seoul took his child Lei Lei to climb a mountain, he used a method of showing weakness to successfully let Lei Lei, who had always wanted to give up, climb to the top of the mountain. When Fu Seoul was climbing the mountain with Lei Lei, Lei Lei kept clamoring to give up because he was too tired at the foot of the mountain. Fu Seoer comforted him in various ways and discussed various methods, but the child still kept complaining that he didn\’t want to crawl anymore. In the end, she had no choice but to sit on the grass and said with a grimace: I don\’t want to leave either, I can\’t hold on anymore, I\’m too tired. \”It was such a way of showing weakness that it aroused the child\’s fighting spirit and changed his mentality. He kept pulling Fu Seoul and said: \”You can\’t do this, you must persist, I want to go to the top of the mountain. \”In life, parents often say to their children that I need you, which is to show weakness to their children. At this time, the children will feel that they are powerful and needed. If parents are strong in everything and never give their children a chance to express themselves, then the children will You will not be able to grow. The Classic Collection of Inspirational Stories and Great Principles [Best-Selling Collector\’s Edition] pdf. Studies have shown that children raised by more powerful parents lack self-confidence than children raised by ordinary parents. At the same time, Shen Yifei, a professor at Fudan University It is also said: The more powerful parents are, the more they must learn to fold their wings, because the power of adults will become a ceiling for children\’s development. Child, you decide. The famous host Jing Yidan said that one thing she often says to her daughter is: You Make your own decisions. From what clothes to wear to what items to choose, she lets her children make the decisions. Ever since her daughter went to elementary school, she has set aside a special compartment in the closet for her children’s clothes, and then said to her children , these are your clothes, you usually decide what to wear. This way of raising children is particularly wise. As parents, many times you need to let go and let your children make decisions. Because the children are still young, making wrong decisions will affect them.The sound won\’t be too loud. When the choice he makes is wrong, after bearing the corresponding consequences, he can be allowed to reflect on improvements and how he can do better next time. Children who often make decisions will always make wrong choices. Such constant mistakes will make them understand that one\’s decisions are not correct every time. In this way, he can be trained to become mentally stronger, so that when he faces important decisions in the future, he will dare to make choices instead of being timid and hesitant. At the same time, such a child will be more assertive and responsible. He will feel that there are some things that I can control and that I can be responsible for my own actions. Therefore, you can give your children more opportunities to make decisions: \”Child, what should we eat for dinner?\” \”Child, how should we arrange the weekend?\” \”When traveling, where should we go to have fun?\” Parents are aware Allowing children to make choices will improve their decision-making and thinking abilities, which will be beneficial to their future study and life. In normal times, I will ask his opinion as long as it is about my children. It ranges from dressing and eating to traveling. So he is only over 4 years old, but he is very independent. He can express what he likes and dislikes, what he wants to do and what he doesn\’t want to do. Surveys show that children who are often able to make decisions will have stronger intrinsic motivation, a greater sense of competence, a more positive emotional state, prefer challenges, and are more likely to persevere in doing things. Moreover, when parents give their children the opportunity to make decisions, they will feel that they are respected. Son, you are doing better than me. There is a topic on Zhihu: What are the psychological effects of being denied by parents for a long time on children? One netizen responded regarding her experience. This netizen said that her parents never affirmed her since she was a child. Especially her mother, who often calls her \”a pig with a human head\”, \”trash\”, \”I hate you when I see you\” and so on. Every time she wanted to do something, her parents and family members would constantly deny her and feel that she would not be able to do it well. Because she had been indoctrinated with the concept of \”you can\’t do anything, you can\’t do anything\” for a long time, she began to acquiesce in this \”fact\” and felt that she was worthless. Many parents cannot bear that their children are better than themselves or do better than themselves, so they will deny their children by belittling them. If you want your children to become mentally strong, parents must learn to put aside their dignity and play the role of a weakling at the appropriate time to set off their children\’s strength, or sincerely praise and affirm their children when they do better than themselves in some aspects. \”Wow, my child, your composition is much better than when my mother was a child.\” \”My child, you are really good at basketball, even better than your father.\” Parents\’ praise will make their children realize that they have a bright spot. , he can be better than others in some aspects, which will increase his self-confidence and make him mentally stronger. When a child finds that he is worse than others in some aspect, he will not be jealous because he knows that everyone has strengths and weaknesses. William James, a famous American psychologist, once said: \”The deepest essence of human nature is the desire to be appreciated.\” Everyone wants to be recognized, and so do children. when he oftenWhen parents feel that they are doing well in their feedback, they will be more willing to develop in the direction expected by their parents. And some research shows that if parents often praise their children for doing well, the children will be more willing to try challenging problems in the future. Children, it doesn’t matter. I watched a speech by Professor Zhou Haihong of the Central Conservatory of Music. I was particularly touched. He said: “Parents should not regard correcting their children’s mistakes as their first task. Because when we work hard to correct our children’s mistakes, we are not allowed to In the process of children making mistakes, they actually cultivate a child who is afraid of making mistakes. Many people think that people who do not make mistakes are excellent. However, in this society, a person who is not afraid of making mistakes is better. A person who is not afraid of making mistakes is better. A person who does not make mistakes has more development opportunities than a person who does not make mistakes. It is impossible for people not to make mistakes. If a child is cultivated to be afraid of making mistakes, the child will lose many opportunities for social survival. We often When it comes to a successful person, he is often ready to seize opportunities. If we implement him into specific personality characteristics, it is that such a person is often not afraid of making mistakes. He has the personality quality of moving forward bravely and daring to seize opportunities. , is the sense of security that comes from the childhood learning process. Therefore, parents should not always correct their children\’s mistakes.\” When parents find that their children have made mistakes, they immediately correct them. This will make them think that people cannot make mistakes. In the end, you will not be able to accept your own mistakes, let alone accept corrections from others, so you will have no way to improve from your mistakes. A child with a strong heart should have the ability to not be afraid of making mistakes and learn from mistakes. This requires parents to accept their children\’s mistakes and allow them to grow from their mistakes. When a child does not do well enough and is accepted by his parents, he will not be too scrupulous in his heart, and will be more confident and courageous to try. If he continues to temper himself, his inner endurance will be stronger. When you encounter setbacks or difficulties in the future, you will not lose your fighting spirit. It is more important for parents to tolerate their children\’s occasional mistakes and accept their children\’s imperfections than to severely criticize and accuse them. Gu Mingyuan, a professor at Beijing Normal University, once said: \”Children always regard their parents as the most trustworthy people, and their parents\’ education often plays a decisive role in children\’s minds.\” Whether a child\’s heart will be strong or fragile in the future often depends on the parents. Wise parents know how to use scientific methods to make their children stronger and better. A child\’s strength does not come from fighting, but rather from the confidence and support given to him by his parents. Click [Like], only children whose parents take care of everything will have the courage and determination to move forward.