How to raise an educated child

Recently, you can often see some exposed \”naughty children\” on the Internet: in restaurants, cinemas, and shopping malls, some children are making noises, running around in all kinds of crazy ways, and even bumping into people without saying \”I\’m sorry.\” ; In parks and scenic spots, some children litter, climb trees and pick flowers, and defecate everywhere… Some people think these are just trivial matters. But in fact, hidden behind every trivial matter is the quality and upbringing of a child. British philosopher Locke once said: \”In uncultured people, bravery becomes rude, knowledge becomes pedantry, wit becomes amusement, simplicity becomes rudeness, and kindness becomes flattery.\” Compared with just paying attention to it. Forward-looking parents will pay more attention to their children\’s etiquette and upbringing when it comes to their children\’s academic performance. Whether a child is well-educated or not is reflected in the following 9 details of life. When the writer Ye Shengtao, a writer on empathy, often warns his children to think more about others. He once told a story: Once, his father asked his son to hand him a pen, and the son handed it over casually. Unexpectedly, the tip of the pen fell into my father\’s hand, and the ink stained his hand. The father said to his son: \”When handing something to someone else, you should consider whether it will be inconvenient for the other person to receive it. If you pass the pen over, others will have to turn it around, and if there is no pen cap, your hand will be stained with ink.\” A truly kind child, Always know how to put yourself in others\’ shoes and put yourself in others\’ shoes. This is a kind of gentleness that extends to others. In daily life, we should intentionally cultivate children\’s ability to \”think from others\’ perspective\”: when taking the elevator, hold the door open button for the person behind you; when handing a knife to someone else, the tip of the knife should face you; when taking the subway or bus, don\’t lean on it At the door, make it easy for others to come in and out… No one in this world is an island. Teach your children to think in their shoes and put others at heart, so that they can gain more kindness and gentleness in their life. In \”Don\’t Trouble Others\”, tutor Zhang Quanling once shared the story of a Shanghai classmate. One day, this classmate brought his friend home to live with him. When his friend got up in the morning to wash up, he found that the neighbors were staring at him closely. My friend was surprised. I just brushed my teeth. What’s so good about it? The classmate explained that in Shanghai, most people live in Tongzi buildings. Several households share a kitchen, and 20 or 30 people use one faucet to brush their teeth, wash their faces, and cook. Especially in the morning, the young ones are rushing to go to school, the young people are rushing to go to work, and the elderly have to wash the pots and cook. So since he was a child, his classmates\’ parents have always told him to immediately let go of the faucet and wash up next to him as soon as he has finished collecting water. It may seem like an insignificant little habit, but it avoids causing trouble to the neighbors. Frequently causing trouble to others means not treating other people\’s time as time and lacking respect for others. No matter how highly educated such a child is, he is still an unqualified person and a refined egoist in the eyes of others. In the life of keeping promises and punctuality, many parents may have encountered this situation: their children clearly promised to watch cartoons for half an hour, but did not stop when the time came; they made an appointment with their friends to go out to play, but they left before going out. , but the child lingers and makes others wait for a long time; when going to school, the child either steps on the spot, or is criticized by the teacher for being late many times.Being punished to stand… seems to be just a small problem, but I don\’t know that what is reflected behind it is whether a child has a sense of responsibility and credibility. Keeping promises and punctuality is the most basic courtesy and respect in dealing with others. At this point, parents must set an example and practice what they preach. Sometimes, children\’s failure to keep their words is actually because their parents always go back on their word. So you must do what you promise your children. Once parents lose their authority in their children\’s hearts, it will be in vain no matter how hard they teach their children to abide by promises and be punctual. Before I knew what was right, my best friend who was a class teacher in middle school told me this: Last semester, a new classmate Xiao Li came to their class. He had a straightforward personality and was willing to help others, which left a good impression on my best friend. However, what surprised her was that after three months, Xiao Li became the most unpopular classmate in the class. After asking about it, my best friend found out that it was because Xiao Li often accidentally leaked the privacy of his friends, took things from other classmates without permission, or posted ugly photos of his friends online. Such behavior naturally caused dissatisfaction and complaints from the students. Joseph Stewart once said: \”Respecting other people\’s privacy is respecting your own personality.\” Only by knowing how to maintain propriety in interactions and respect other people\’s feelings can children gain true friendship. In our daily lives, we must pay attention to cultivating our children\’s \”sense of proportion.\” Tell your children not to get to the bottom of things that others don’t want to talk about, and not to look through other people’s personal belongings without permission. After all, there are some things that children will never understand if their parents don’t teach them. Stay polite. Some time ago, People\’s Daily released a video that was very touching. The story happened on a rainy day. An old scavenger dropped his goods when he turned a corner on his bicycle. Firefighters passing by saw this and rushed to help. Just when everyone thought the matter was over, a little girl ran out of the old man\’s car. As a little girl, she earnestly bent down at 90 degrees and bowed twice to express her gratitude to the firefighter uncles. I once heard a saying: \”In this world, nothing is taken for granted, and nothing is what should be done.\” The most important thing in life is to be polite, always be grateful, and express sincerity for the help given to others. Thanks. The same goes for educating children. The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! When receiving help from others, children should be taught to say \”thank you\” and to lend a helping hand in time when the other person needs help; when causing trouble to others, they should keep this in mind and repay others\’ kindness in a timely manner. Being polite is the starting point for children to be good people and do things, and it is the \”education business card\” that children carry with them. Know how to be tolerant. On the subway, I witnessed such a small incident: a little boy was playing on his mobile phone. He suddenly pointed at the video and said to his father: \”Look at this boy wearing a skirt with long hair. It\’s so funny!\” The father on the side heard it and said, He said to his son with a serious expression: \”No one stipulates that boys cannot wear skirts or have long hair. Son, you must learn to treat the differences of others with a more tolerant attitude.\” The world is so big, and everyone has their own way of living. As Formanov once said: \”EveryEveryone has their own characteristics, no two people are the same. \”The so-called respect is neither to criticize condescendingly nor to sympathize with arrogance, but to treat the other person as a person like ourselves. For children, academic qualifications are a stepping stone for them to enter society. Respect and Tolerance is a passport for them to go further. As long as they do not hurt others, no one in this world is nobler than anyone else, and no one is more correct than anyone else. When a child learns to respect the value of others, he can use an equal heart To look at every plant and tree in this world. Carefully evaluate the news I saw. A mother was crying and beating her child on the subway. She was groping for something on the ground regardless of her appearance, which caused great dissatisfaction around her. The flight attendant came to ask what happened. It turned out that She lost a five-yuan subway ticket. When the passenger next to her heard it, she muttered in a low voice: It’s only five yuan, what else? It’s not even enough for a cup of milk tea. Afterwards, the mother explained: Her monthly salary is only It’s only 900 yuan. It is written in \”To Kill a Mockingbird\”: You can never truly understand a person unless you walk around in his shoes and think about things from his perspective… Yes What you see at that time is not the truth. What you understand is just the tip of the iceberg floating on the water. A kind word will warm you for three winters, but a bad word will hurt you for six months. Don\’t criticize others without their suffering, even if you don\’t understand. , and don’t make random comments about good or bad. Parents, please tell your children: When interacting with people, whether strangers or acquaintances, do not know others’ experiences and do not judge others easily. Learn to listen to a parent with a junior high school child who came to me to complain: “My child obviously has a good personality, studies well, and is very kind, but why are the classmates in the class not willing to play with him? \”After careful inquiry, I discovered that the child is an outspoken person. When talking to other students in the class, he always interrupts other people\’s conversations and can\’t wait to express his opinions. At first, the students around him didn\’t pay much attention, but how many times After a lot of time, I naturally got tired of this habit of interrupting others at will. I heard a saying: \”If you can talk well, you can win an audience; but only if you listen well, you can win friends.\” \”Listening represents acceptance and understanding. When listening, children can learn knowledge from other people\’s languages ​​and understand other people\’s attitudes and principles. A person who is good at listening is definitely a patient and respectful person. It is naturally easier for a person to gain favor and respect from others. In the process of children growing up, parents must first learn to listen to their children and influence them subtly, so that children also understand: when they learn to listen, they also learn to respect others. Those who It is difficult for people who only care about themselves to talk without giving others a chance to speak. Controlling Emotions I saw a video some time ago that made people very worried. In the video, a fifteen-year-old boy was talking He was immersed in the mobile phone game. His mother couldn\’t stand it and tried to grab the phone to teach the boy to reduce his use of mobile phones. However, the boy suddenly lost control and punched and kicked his mother. The younger brother beside him was so frightened that he cried. Netizens who saw the video said that naughty children who can\’t control their emotions are really scary! Professor Li Meijin once said: \”It\’s necessary toLet children learn to control their emotions, especially before the age of 6. Parents don\’t care about it. They won\’t be able to control it even if they want to wait until adolescence. \”When a child loses his temper, it is a good opportunity to cultivate the child\’s emotional management ability. The child cannot explain or express, and parents can guide him step by step: for example, when a child is angry, you can teach him to take a deep breath, or count from 1 When you reach 10 years old, you can also take a walk with your child outside and let the child express his feelings in words. Help the child express his emotions in a positive way instead of blindly stopping the child from losing his temper. Only then will the child gradually learn to control his anger. Good Education is an instinct that is integrated into the bones, reflected in the details of life, and makes people move inadvertently. As the writer Dean said: \”Education, this thing is like a blood vessel.\” It can grow intricately in the deepest part of a person\’s flesh and blood and is inseparable. \”If ability determines whether a person can fly high, then education determines whether a person can fly far. Raising an educated child is a lifetime blessing for parents. Give it a thumbs up and encourage all parents.