How to raise children? You must control these three stages in time

Two days ago, while queuing up for a nucleic acid test in the community, I saw a mother scolding her child: \”If you don\’t obey me again, when you go to school, let the teacher give you a good treatment.\” At that time, I thought to myself: What\’s best for the child What is education? Famous educators reveal the secret for you PDF If a child cannot even be disciplined by its parents, how should the teacher discipline it? We spend our whole lives working hard for our children. We gave him generous living conditions, a better learning environment, and the best school, but we found that the child became increasingly difficult to discipline and even drifted away from us. Everything in the world can be repeated if you make a mistake, but the growth of a child is irreversible. We have one and only one chance to raise children. If you miss it, you can never get it back. Educating children is a self-cultivation for parents. How to raise a good child? Only by grasping the characteristics of these three stages of children\’s development will parenting become easier and easier. Before the age of 3, a sense of security is the foundation of upbringing. The \”Three Character Classic\” says, \”It is the fault of the father if he does not teach; if he does not teach strictly, it is the fault of the teacher.\” For children under 3 years old who have not yet entered kindergarten, parents are the child\’s first teachers, and the family is where the child grows. cradle. When your child is young, don’t teach him painting skills or knowledge. The establishment of a sense of security before the age of 3 is more important than anything else. After a child is born, although his body has been separated from his mother, he is still an embryo mentally. Everything around him is unknown to him. They build up their understanding of the world bit by bit through their parents\’ expressions, demeanor, language, and reactions. Children before the age of 3 are still mentally and psychologically symbiotic with their mothers. During this time, if the child is well cared for by his or her parents or other caregivers. Especially if the mother can adopt a loving attitude towards the baby, and this kind of love is frequent, consistent and reliable, the child will feel comfortable and satisfied and establish an initial sense of security. Early childhood education expert Teacher Wu Zhihong once said that if a child is separated from his mother for more than two weeks before the age of 3, the child\’s trauma of being abandoned will be irreversible. The younger the child, the more fragile the child is psychologically and the more difficult it is to make up for the damage. Many cases point out that most problem children often showed repressive behavior when they were young. When they reach adolescence, they often develop antisocial personalities, become rebellious, and develop bad habits. Dr. Maria Montessori said that a child’s development in the first three years after birth exceeds any stage in a child’s life in terms of extent and importance. 0-3 years old is a critical period for children to establish a sense of security. Whether parents can establish a sense of security for their children during this period determines his lifelong emotional connection with the outside world. No matter how much money you earn or how smoothly your career develops, if you miss the first three years when your child needs the most companionship, you will be trading for your child\’s future happiness. If your child develops a rebellious character in the future, you will definitely regret it. As parents, we must establish a sense of security for our children before they are 3 years old. No matter how difficult it is, we must keep our children by our side. Before the age of 6, you must set rules for your children. In recent years, there is a very popular saying in family education: parents should give their children love and freedom, space and rights.Pro; The best way for parents to educate their children is to make friends with them. But are parents really suitable to be friends with their children? Loving children is instinct, setting rules is responsibility, and principled love is true love. A truly good education is actually about parents, their foresight, and their structure and responsibility. As a parent, you must first fulfill your responsibilities as a parent, and secondly, become friends with your children. Dr. Maria Montessori pointed out that the age of 3-6 is a critical period for the formation of children\’s rule awareness and early behavioral habits. Research from Harvard University shows that 3-6 years old is the most critical period for the development of children\’s personality and behavioral habits. It can be described as the \”wet cement period\”. 85%-90% of a child\’s personality, thoughts, and behaviors are formed at this stage. If no rules are established for children before the age of 6, no matter how good the education is, it will be useless. The Montessori educational philosophy tells us that the three bottom lines in disciplining children cannot be violated, that is, do not harm yourself, do not disturb others, and do not damage the environment. Only families with warmth and principles can raise children with awe. 1. There are some things that parents should not be used to saying: \”There are rules at home, but there is no way for the children to cheat!\” This is a common problem in many families: children do not obey your rules and often threaten their parents by crying or not eating. This is largely due to parents lowering the bottom line over and over again. One characteristic of spoiled children is that their demands are always met. When a problem occurs for the first time, if an adult compromises out of shame or is eager to calm the child down, it will only cause more trouble for themselves and the child in the future. 2. Do things you can do by yourself. When a child is very young, it is necessary to cultivate his ability to think independently and cultivate his awareness of doing things by himself. When parents let go one day, they won\’t be too worried. The children themselves are fully capable of controlling everything, and they won\’t be afraid. This is exactly what Dr. Montessori advocates: never help a child do something he thinks he can handle. 3. Enforce the rules gently but firmly, and there will always be times when the children don’t follow them. At this time, many parents are accustomed to \”intimidation\” and try to get their children to cooperate with their parents by raising their voices, reprimanding, or even threatening them. This will not only prevent the children from obeying the rules, but what is even more frightening is that the children may begin to resist and reject the rules from the bottom of their hearts. \”Gentle but firm\” means not only being gentle in tone, but also being strictly enforced. But you need to understand that gentleness and firmness are used to support the child, not to control the child. Before the child is 6 years old, it really doesn’t matter how many words he recognizes, how many Tang poems he memorizes, or how many math problems he can solve. These weak advantages will disappear soon after the children enter the primary school stage. Only by allowing children to develop good habits and rules, the child\’s self-discipline quality will affect the child\’s behavior year after year and ultimately determine the child\’s success or failure. Before the age of 12, the pattern of parents determines the children\’s values. Any outstanding child is not born out of nowhere. He has traces to follow. The secret lies in the family education of his parents. In the program \”Youth Talk\”, a little girl named Deng Jingya stood on the stage and introduced: \”My grandma is veryIt’s strange that he is almost 80 years old but he is still studying, especially doing Olympiad math problems. \”In Xiao Jingya\’s words, \”Grandma is a wonderful flower in the elderly world.\” But grandma has her own opinion: \”We are just ordinary technical talents. This era is developing too fast; only by learning can we keep pace with the times. Go ahead, everyone should live and learn. \”Excellent family, three generations of Fuze. Education is not only about parents, but also about the structure of a family. With such persistence and pursuit, grandma is not like other elderly people who just bask in the sun and make housework; she dares to Pursue new things, influence children with actions, and convey a positive energy to children. The blessings of a family are obtained by the joint efforts of family members. A complete set of FLTRP primary school English textbooks Youyou Reading Growth Plan for Levels 1 to 3 180 Book pdf+mp3+mp4 A good teacher may be able to influence a child for three to five years, but the influence of parents lasts a lifetime. The family that is the starting point of a child directly determines what kind of person he or she will become as an adult. The family of origin The greater the space for understanding, the greater the space for future development of the child. When raising children, parents should not only keep their children healthy and not sick, but also have enough food and clothing. They should also consider what kind of person they will train their children to become! And this depends on the parents. Pattern, because the pattern of parents determines the vision, attitude and methods of raising children. It also indirectly determines the formation of children\’s values, because children\’s values ​​come from the way adults interpret the world.