How to set rules for children before the age of 6

Educate your children as early as possible. As the old saying goes: \”Three-year-olds look older, seven-year-olds look older.\” Therefore, children must be educated within the effective period of parental discipline. For example, this is the case with setting rules for children. If you don’t set rules when you are young, it will become harder to discipline them as they grow older. Italian educator Dr. Maria Montessori pointed out: 3-6 years old is a critical period for the formation of children\’s rule awareness and early behavioral habits. If no rules are established for children before the age of 6, no matter how good the education is, it will be useless. So, how should we set rules for our children? Establishing rules is to help children establish awareness of rules. That is, let children understand that rules are boundaries and know what can and cannot be done. To set rules, you must first understand your children. A study from Yale and Harvard University pointed out that the age of 3 to 6 is the most critical period for the development of children\’s personality and behavioral habits. It can be described as the \”wet cement period\”, and 85% to 90% of the child\’s personality is , ideas, and behaviors are all formed at this stage. In Montessori education, there is the important term \”sensitive period\”. Children aged 0-6 will have multiple sensitive periods such as language, order, space, and emotion. Starting from the age of 2, children will usher in the first rebellious period in their lives, which is the awakening of a sensitive period of self-awareness. The core of self-awareness is \”I\”. This \”I\” seems to be no problem, but it is very problematic for young babies. The concept of \”I\” is not innate, but gradually developed from scratch. Many parents will find that their originally well-behaved babies seem to have changed when they are 2 or 3 years old, and they have to say \”no\” to everything. From the age of 2, children are surprisingly self-centered. [Full two seasons] Doctor of Psychology Zhang Yijun\’s mp3 of children\’s emotional intelligence course, teach you how to raise children with high emotional intelligence who know their own names and know that their names are their own codes; are possessive and unwilling to share; love to say \”no\”, even if It means consent. Resists many arrangements from parents; likes to serve himself; likes to try to do many things that he has never done in the past; is sensitive to any interference from parents. Adhere to one\’s own practices, habits or rules, willful and stubborn; sensitive to the evaluation of parents, etc. Although the child may show signs of rebellion at the beginning of this stage, it is the best time to establish rules. Therefore, when a child\’s self-management begins to sprout, it is necessary to seize the opportunity and establish rules with the child. When setting rules for children, the three-point principle cannot be ignored. Educating children must not only be warm, but also have scale. The three bottom lines for disciplining children cannot be violated, that is, do not harm yourself, do not disturb others, and do not damage the environment. Only a family with warmth and principles can raise well-educated children. The following three principles are for parents’ reference. 1. There are some things that parents should not be used to saying: \”There are rules at home, but there is no way for the children to cheat!\” This is a common problem in many families: children do not listen to your principles and often threaten their parents by crying or not eating. This is largely due to parents lowering the bottom line over and over again. One characteristic of spoiled children is that their demands are always met. The first time a problem occurs, the adults are concerned about face, or are eager to calm the children downCompromising as soon as possible will only cause more trouble for yourself and your children in the future. 2. Children must bear some responsibilities themselves. There is this dialogue in the classic picture book \”I Will Always Love You\”: Ali: \”If I make feathers fly all over the pillow, will you still love me?\” Mom: \”I will always love you.\” You, but you have to gather your feathers.\” Ali: \”If I spill the paint on my sister, will you still love me?\” Mom: \”I will always love you, but you have to be responsible for your sister. Take a shower.\” The mother in this story did a particularly good job. She took the trouble to assure you: \”I will always love you\”, while at the same time not forgetting to emphasize: My child, you are responsible for your own actions. You should try your best to recover or make up for the consequences of your actions. Parents cannot help their children escape, but should require their children to bear the consequences of their wrong words and deeds, so that their children have the honesty and courage to face their mistakes. 3. Love can be unconditional, but it must be principled. Love is the premise of education and the basis for establishing rules. In an interview with CNN, former US President Obama gave his parenting experience: set rules and give love. Talking about the \”father\’s advice\” on educating his two daughters. Obama said: \”Give your children unconditional love. At the same time, set the general direction and some rules for them. Usually they will do very well.\” To set rules, parents must master three tricks. Children aged 3-6 must immediately What are the rules? 1. Do what you can do yourself. Long Yingtai wrote in \”Watching Off\”: \”The so-called father-daughter, mother-son scene only means that your fate with him is to watch his back gradually fade away in this life. Far away.\” No matter how much they love their children, parents cannot accompany their children throughout their lives. Children, you can only rely on yourself for the path of life. Therefore, when a child is very young, it is necessary to cultivate his ability to think independently and his awareness of doing his own things. When parents let go one day, they won\’t be too worried; the children themselves are fully capable of controlling everything, and they won\’t be afraid. This is exactly what Dr. Montessori advocates: never help a child do something he thinks he can handle. 2. Make free choices and develop the habit of self-discipline. Kant said: \”Freedom is self-discipline, and self-discipline is the greatest freedom.\” Children have to walk their own path in the future, and no one can replace them. If they want to have more choices and opportunities in the future, Self-discipline is essential. Children can develop good habits of self-discipline, which liberates children and themselves. The core of self-discipline is inseparable from concentration. Only in a state of concentration will children develop inner discipline. Children with inner discipline can eventually achieve obedience: obeying the order established in their own hearts – self-discipline. Self-discipline is not something that comes naturally; it is an ability that needs to be learned and continuously enhanced. Therefore, children are free to choose the teaching aids to operate, the length of working hours, and the place to work. The freedom under these rules helps children develop good habits of self-discipline. 3. Use encouraging and positive language to affirm children. Psychological research shows that proper encouragement of children plays a decisive role in shaping children\’s behavior and cultivating good moral character. So, we wantLearn to encourage our children. The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! \”Praise\” is given when children perform well, but too much praise makes children feel boring; untrue praise makes children doubt the sincerity of adults. But no matter whether the child performs well or poorly, \”encouragement\” can provide support and care. Especially when the child suffers setbacks, encouragement is needed so that the child can feel accepted and affirmed. When we remind or advise our children, we should use \”positive affirmations\” rather than \”negative statements.\” For example, when you want to dissuade your child from jumping next to tables and chairs, instead of saying: \”How many times have I told you not to jump next to tables and chairs, but you just don\’t understand.\” Instead, say: \”I\’m very worried that you will get hurt. Please Don’t jump around tables and chairs.” I read a sentence that inspired me and I would like to share it with all parents: Educating children requires a kind of perseverance, and you must adapt to the child’s feelings and rhythm. If you use the wrong education direction and method, your child will knock you off. fly. Loving children is instinct, setting rules is responsibility, and loving children wisely is long-lasting love. Click \”Like\”, we will grow together on the journey of parenting.