Huang Lei: Men can’t do this when they get married. I will never let my daughter marry him.

Two days ago, Rui\’s mother accompanied her little niece to choose a wedding dress. Because there were so many girls trying on wedding dresses that day, the clerk couldn\’t take care of them, and my niece was obviously a little irritable. Later, when it was her turn to try it on, she tried several sets but nothing she liked. This was great, my little niece completely exploded, took off her wedding dress and pulled me out. The two of us went to the cafe, intending to drink something to calm down. As soon as we sat down, my little niece complained very irritably: \”Aunt, getting married is so troublesome that I don\’t even want to get married.\” I quickly comforted her and said, \”Everyone is here like this. Besides, I\’ve only been busy for a while. Besides, you still have your husband.\” When the niece heard this, she was unhappy again: \”Don\’t mention him, because we don\’t know how many quarrels we had over preparing for the wedding. He doesn\’t like what I like, and I don\’t like what he likes. It\’s really annoying to go back and forth so many times before I can decide. It makes me not want to hold a wedding, so I can just get a certificate. Auntie, what is the meaning of a wedding?\” I saw that my niece was so annoyed that she began to doubt the meaning of the wedding, and I quickly thought about it. I must find a reason for my child to happily accept this wedding. . So I did some psychological work on my niece from the following three aspects. A man who doesn’t want to give you a wedding is also unwilling to give you love. A while ago, Huang Lei, who has two precious daughters at home, was a guest on a program and expressed his own opinion on the question \”Is a wedding really necessary?\”: \” I often fantasize about my daughter getting married, and I will definitely cry. But if one day, that man tells my daughter that there is no wedding, I will tell my daughter not to marry him. Even such a sense of ceremony is gone. No, I think it’s wrong.” Does a woman really want that “tiring” wedding? No, what we want is nothing more than a sense of ritual. As Huang Lei said, when he and his wife Sun Li got married 20 years ago, there was no wedding or diamond ring, they just had a simple meal and they were married. But 20 years later, in order to commemorate this 20-year marriage where they still love each other as before, they chose to hold a wedding so that their two daughters could witness the sweet love of their parents. In fact, a wedding is just a simple ceremony, but the couple can use the ceremony to commemorate their marriage and their love for each other. When a marriage is weighed down by trivial matters, daily necessities, daily necessities, and daily necessities, think about the wedding of that year. The solemn and happy sense of ceremony will remind you to cherish and be grateful to the lover around you; the ring on your hand will also remind you, You married this man because of love. A man who is willing to give you a sense of ceremony will tell you to buy the one you like when he takes you to choose a wedding ring, and don’t care about the price. Of course, you won’t be willing to buy something too expensive; a man who is willing to give you a sense of ceremony must also want to give you a sense of ceremony. I will have a grand wedding with you and announce in front of many relatives and friends that this woman now belongs to me. What would a marriage become without the sense of ritual? Zhang Quanling said that she and her husband had an agreement. If her husband snores, she can go to the guest room to sleep; if Zhang Quanling comes home late, she will go to the guest room to sleep; however, if they argue that dayYes, we have to sleep in the same bed at night. Luo Zhenyu also said that he and his wife have an agreement that whoever gets up first every morning will squeeze out toothpaste for the other person. To put it bluntly, the sense of ritual is actually a node in the ordinary married life. It can remind us to remember each other\’s agreement, effectively protect our marriage, and make each other more tolerant. Once a marriage lacks a sense of ritual, problems will arise in the relationship between husband and wife. The most obvious manifestation is that everything revolves around the children, and the relationship between husband and wife is no longer the first priority. Rui\’s mother\’s second uncle and second aunt\’s family have always been representatives of model families in our opinion. Usually, the two of them take their children on trips whenever they have free time. Looking at the happy photos posted in their circle of friends, they are simply envious of others. When they chat occasionally, the second uncle and the second aunt are also very proud of their daughter. The tacit understanding in their eyes seems to say: \”We are very happy.\” But just last year, the second uncle and the second aunt divorced! This was completely beyond our expectation. Although we tried to dissuade them in every possible way, the two of them remained unmoved. Later, when I chatted with my second aunt, I found out that since their daughter went away to study two years ago, the two of them suddenly discovered that the house was eerily quiet without their children. The two of them could go the whole day without saying a word because they didn\’t know what to say. Every day, the two of them are busy with their own things. Occasionally when the child calls back, the two of them chat with the child for a while, hang up the phone, and have nothing to say to each other again. Later, the two simply separated. The second aunt couldn\’t stand this depressing atmosphere, so she requested a divorce, and the second uncle agreed. After the divorce, the second uncle said: \”No one is to blame. The blame is that our lives revolved so much around our children that we both forgot how to be husband and wife.\” A marriage without a sense of ritual, It will cause the couple to lose contact and eventually get lost in the trivial daily life. Behind the sense of ritual is love and fulfillment. In the fairy tale, the little prince asked the fox: \”What is the ritual?\” The fox said: \”It makes one day different from other days, and makes one moment different from other moments.\” The sense of ritual is not as good as yours It\’s so complicated to think about, so there\’s no need to make a big show of it. Many small affections in daily life are the sense of ritual in marriage. I have seen some jokes on Weibo about parents showing affection, which is a concrete manifestation of the sense of ritual in real life. On Valentine\’s Day, my dad gave me 100 yuan. I embarrassedly told him that I didn\’t have a girlfriend, but my dad said, \”I know, I\’ll give you 100 yuan so you can go out to eat.\” \”Baby,\” I said, \”Huh?\” What are you doing?” “I’m calling you mom.” It was a holiday on Saturday, and I thought I hadn’t been home for a long time. I packed up my things and was about to go home. I called my dad. My dad said that he had gone on a trip with my mom. He said it was noisy outside and long-distance calls were expensive, so he asked me to stay in school, and then he hung up, hung up… One day my dad came back and had lunch with me. Halfway through the meal, my mom called him and we talked for a while. Afterwards, my dad said to me who was eating silently beside me: \”Your mom and I have been married for more than 20 years, and we have to make a phone call at noon every day before I can take a nap peacefully, every day!!\” Then Dese laughed next to him… …In married life, everyA sense of ritual is at work in a moment that touches each other. Life is already very difficult, but I am still willing to use even a little bit of my contribution to let the other person feel a little bit of my care and companionship. Let this small ritual remind us to cherish the people in front of us, love each other, and communicate sincerely. In this way Only then will a good cycle be formed and a truly happy and loving child be raised. Therefore, when you get married, if the other person is not willing to give your daughter a wedding, then don\’t expect him to be romantic and considerate to your daughter in your future marriage. Such a man should think carefully about it.