\”I didn\’t do well in math, so I got 99 points.\”

I would like to dedicate this article to parents who are facing their children’s final exams. I went to pick up my son after get off work, and there were only a few children in the lounge. After receiving my son, he happily said to me: \”Mom, we have a math test. What score do you think I got?\” I asked casually: \”How many scores did I get?\” He tried to be mysterious and said, \”Guess? Better than last time.\” I took more tests every time.\” I asked again: \”How many points did you get in the last test?\” He thought for a while and said, \”I forgot.\” Then, he couldn\’t help but tell me: \”Mom, I got 90 points in the test. \”I said: \”Not bad, there is progress.\” In my impression, my son scored 99 points in the math test once, but other than that, he never exceeded 90 points. Basically around 85 points. This result is of course the last one. I may not be a biological mother, but I feel that as long as I can score 80 or above and have no major problems with my IQ, it\’s just sloppy and incorrect examination of a few questions, which is normal. After having fun with him for a while, the matter passed. In the lounge, I had a casual chat with a few other children. I asked them what they did on weekends and what they liked to play on weekdays. One of the children is my son\’s classmate. He said that he can only watch TV on Friday nights. I spend the rest of my time doing homework or taking interest classes, including weekends. I know this child, he is good at studying and sensible. At the parent-teacher meeting a few days ago, his father, as a parent of an outstanding student, took the stage to speak. At that time, he said that he had strict requirements on his children. It can be said that it is the dream of many parents to raise their children like this. Of course, this was also my dream when I was having a breakdown because of helping my kids with their homework. However, calm down and think about it, this is not what I expected – look, some parents are always self-righteous, always take it for granted, are always quite narcissistic, always hope that things will develop in the direction they expect, and always Contradictory. Sooner or later, more than 90% of parents will find that the future of their children is not what you expected, if you have expectations. Such a well-educated and sensible child, when I took my son away, he said to me: \”Auntie, I\’m just not very good at math. I didn\’t do well in the exam this time.\” I asked: \”What score did you get?\” He said sadly: \”99 points.\” I was a little dizzy, but I pretended to be calm and reassured him: \”It\’s already very good.\” He said: \”I used to get 100 points in the test.\” I asked: \”Will you get 99 points in the test?\” Criticism?\” He nodded. Then, I asked my son, what is the highest score in your class? The son said: \”99 points.\” \”In other words, this child got the first place in the exam. I don\’t want to say what\’s wrong with today\’s education. From the bottom of my heart, I am grateful for exam-oriented education. Without exam-oriented education, I might not be able to leave the village of Yangchang Xiaodao. But , Sometimes, I resent exam-oriented education, because after working, I found that a lot of the knowledge I learned in school was not used. Moreover, it was formatted quite badly, and it took me more time to adapt to society than other students. What\’s annoying is that I spent a lot of time studying professional courses. In order to stay at the top of the class, I would feel sad if I didn\’t do well in the exam. As a result, after graduation, I was not assigned to the ideal unit as I expected – I didn\’t know at the time that I had lived there for 18 years. The county does not look at scores. Later, several copies were changedWork has proved that academic qualifications are only a stepping stone, and scores are even more irrelevant. What\’s even more annoying is that I don\’t like my major, and now I\’m basically in a semi-career transition state. Tell me, why did you spend all that energy back then? For what? Wouldn’t that time be better spent reading? After all, with my reading interest, concentration, and memory back then, although it was not first-class, it was at least much better than having ten books on my bedside now, with each book turning ten pages. Whenever I regret my lost youth, I don’t regret not attending classes well, but I regret studying too much for utilitarian purposes—getting high scores in exams, winning praise from teachers and praise from classmates. What will happen if I miss one point? Will the sky fall? So what if you don’t take the first place? Will the ground sink into a hole? Won\’t! However, when I was a child, I really felt that it would! Because the environment put a lot of pressure on me, and at that time I had no ability to relieve the pressure. The consequences of this are that you always compare yourself with classmates (friends) who are better than you, and when you finally cannot compare with them, you become depressed. And my best friend is my biological brother. I spent 1.5 times his energy and could only get 0.5 times his grades. From then on, I understood the truth: studying hard is an attitude, and studying well is an ability. Therefore, my request to my children is that as long as you try your best, don’t compare yourself to others. However, the effect is very poor, and he always likes to compare with others. For example, if he scores 60 points in the Chinese language test, he will say, Mom, our class xxx scored 59 points. As an adult, I gradually understand that life is so long that you don’t even know when something will happen or your life will change in the blink of an eye. Life is too short, so short that we haven’t had time to do truly meaningful things, and half of it passes in the blink of an eye. Studying is important, grades are important, and scores are of course important. It’s just that the child is more important! The final exam is coming soon. Your child has worked hard all semester. Whether he scores 9 or 99, remember to give your child a hug and tell him: Mom and Dad love you. It has nothing to do with whether you take more or less exams.