How terrible is it to cry about poverty with your children? Excellent parents will never pin this matter on their children. How to minimize the harm to children when parents divorce. That evening, there was no sunset and the sky was gray. The wind seemed crazier than usual, causing the branches to sway wildly. The campus seemed particularly silent. Suddenly, there was a \”bang\” sound, and a heavy object fell to the ground from a high place. Then, the bright red liquid seeped out in all directions. shocking. \”Blood!\” a class teacher in the first year of high school screamed. Not far from her feet, there was a person. It was a \”heavy object\” that had just fallen from the sky. She took a closer look. It seemed to be a student, and it seemed like a boy in her class. At that moment, she felt dizzy. The above scene is the statement of a senior class teacher in a middle school in our district. Yes, the boy who jumped off the building was a student in her class. This incident happened a few days ago. A freshman boy from the middle school jumped from the fifth floor of the teaching building and disappeared. The parents were heartbroken and the teachers were frightened. The reason for jumping off the building is said to be love. When he was young, he was dating a girl from another school. Then the girl wanted to break up, but the boy couldn\’t think about it anymore, so he jumped off the building. The head teacher had already discovered the problem and had enlightened him, and his mood seemed to have calmed down. The head teacher was worried and called the parents, took him home to recuperate, and told the parents to treat him carefully and pay close attention to the student\’s emotions. The parents took the child home and felt that there was nothing wrong with the child. At the child\’s request, they sent the child back to school. Then the tragedy happened. Everyone was talking about this, and it seemed that they wanted to find someone to take responsibility for this tragedy. The blame was mostly directed at the school and the head teacher. This is a blind accusation made by parents who are too sad. You can\’t stand a person who wants to die. Maybe the child\’s parents didn\’t understand why their child wanted to die? The head teacher has told them to pay attention to their children\’s psychology and emotions. Why do they ignore it? This tragedy might have been avoided if the child\’s parents had some knowledge of psychology. Because parents do not understand what kind of psychological state their children\’s behavior and emotional changes reveal, they cannot interpret their children\’s psychological problems. If you can\’t find the problem, you won\’t be able to prescribe the right remedy. Many parents have discovered that children nowadays have more and more worries. They feel they cannot understand their children. Just like why someone would commit suicide after losing love, they can\’t figure it out. When it comes to children’s education, they are increasingly unable to do what they want. Education is not a simple matter. It is a marathon. The road is long, complicated and extremely difficult. In this arduous and long process of raising children, parents should understand some psychological knowledge. Parenting experts say that today, as the importance of family education becomes more and more obvious, parents must understand some psychology. A parent who does not know psychology will not be a competent parent. Parents must understand some psychological knowledge, even some superficial definitions. We found that the older generation left us many \”mantras\” on parenting, such as the child will be older when it is born, the child will understand when he grows up, what does he know when he is so young, etc. These \”mantras\” no longer seem to be valid. . When we educate our children, what the older generation, and even most parents, ignore the most is the psychological growth of their children. Reason for ignoring, it should not be a matter of turning a blind eye, but more of a lack of knowledge in this area. We know how to make children eat better, dress them better, and provide them with a better education in a better environment. However, when children have these problems, we don’t know how to deal with them. For example, why do children suddenly become tired of studying and why do they like to skip school? If you didn’t tell a lie before, why do you keep telling lies now? Why do children who are always optimistic and cheerful suddenly like silence? Why are children so grumpy? Why can\’t children concentrate on doing one thing well… You really want to get into your child, listen to his inner voice, and understand what\’s on his mind. But you can\’t hear a word. Faced with these abnormal behaviors of your children, you are at a loss and unable to do anything. This is all because we cannot understand the psychological factors behind children\’s superficial behaviors. In layman\’s terms, we cannot get into the child\’s psychology. We cannot interpret it because we seriously lack basic psychological knowledge. Although he is very responsible, he lacks sufficient parenting skills, so he and his children will be stuck in various psychological disputes for a long time and cannot extricate themselves. We want to help our children, but find we can’t. This feeling of powerlessness is, I believe, the most painful thing for parents. Lu Xun said: \”The world of children is completely different from that of adults. If you don\’t understand it first and act blindly, it will greatly hinder the development of your child.\” If you don\’t understand this, not only will you not be able to help your child grow up healthily, but it will also hinder your child\’s growth. . Some common phenomena in our lives contain some psychological knowledge and laws. For example, don’t tell your child the answer right away, lest he or she will not be deeply impressed by the principle of “the law of psychological tension.” Also, there are some things that cannot be said directly to the child, but can only be conveyed in a subtle way or subtly. At this time, we use the \”principle of psychological suggestion\”. The more we understand these psychological knowledge and parenting rules, the more we can deal with various problems in our children, and the more we can guide our children to develop in a good direction. However, if we lack this knowledge, the situation will not be optimistic. For example, some parenting articles mentioned the \”naughty child incident\”. It is said that the naughty child has behaviors that ordinary people cannot tolerate. From the child\’s behavior, it can be inferred that his parents are uneducated. Perhaps the language of these accusations against parents is too strong. I think they are more out of control with their children\’s behavior. They must know that these behaviors of their children are not good, but there is nothing they can do. The reason why they are powerless is that they cannot detect the child\’s psychological factors from these performances, so they cannot \”prescribe the right medicine\”. Therefore, if parents do not know some psychological knowledge, they will not be able to deal with various problems that arise when their children grow up. If you can\’t cope with it, then your original wish to train your children to develop morally, intellectually, artistically and physically will be in vain. There are also some parenting articles that tell you very seriously from a psychological point of view, what kind of behavior of parents can ruin a child\’s life. They say if your child is constantly bothering you, it\’s because you\’re lacking physical contact and intimacy. If your child lies, it means you have overreacted to a mistake he or she has made. If your child is jealous, it may be because you are constantly comparing other children to them. If your child gets angry easily it\’s because you don\’t give them enough praise and they have to do rude things to get your attention…that\’s true. In life, you can always hear some parents saying that they are annoyed that their children always like to cling to them and always like to disturb them when they are working. At this time, they always scolded the children impatiently and asked them to stay alone. Comparing one\’s own children with other children\’s children is a behavior that can be seen everywhere. When a child\’s grades are not good, he will compare him with other children, his ability to dress and eat, and he also likes to compare him with other children. It seems that my children are always inferior to others. If parents knew that such comparison would cause twisted jealousy in their children, they would definitely not dare to do it. This is all caused by ignorance of psychological knowledge and parenting rules. Because we cannot understand what these children\’s behaviors reveal about their inner desires, we will ignore them, ignore them, and attack them. Therefore, it is not an exaggeration to say that parents who do not understand psychology will ruin their children\’s lives. If a child’s parents do not receive mental health education from generation to generation and do not have any psychological knowledge, it is impossible to provide psychological counseling to their children. If parents do not understand psychological knowledge, they will not know that a child\’s mental health problem is the first priority in nurturing a child. If parents do not understand psychology, they cannot understand the difference and cause and effect of mental health and mental illness, then they may destroy their children. In real life, many parents even believe that only \”mentally ill\” people need mental health education. If you go to a psychiatrist or a psychological consultation room, you will be mistaken for being mentally ill and looked down upon. Therefore, if you have psychological problems, you will not dare to see a psychiatrist or a psychiatrist. For parents who think this way, it is because they do not understand what psychological knowledge is. Because of this, one of my classmates ruined his correct life. A female college classmate is bright and charming, but sometimes a bit introverted. The reason why I say this is that she feels a little emotional. Sometimes he smiles brightly at others, and sometimes he is taciturn and ignores people. We don\’t have a close relationship with each other, and I don\’t know whether her abnormal behavior is innate or acquired. Finally one day, her roommate discovered the problem. Said she often forgets to eat and always likes to stay in bed. She said that she often stood on the balcony alone and looked toward the library with a look of horror. She said that when she was studying in the classroom, she would often laugh and cry. They reported it to the head teacher. The head teacher discovered that she already had serious psychological problems because she was already experiencing auditory hallucinations and hallucinations. The head teacher immediately summoned his parents to inform them of the seriousness of the situation. The classmate’s parents took her home, thinking that she would be fine if she rested at home for a while. Then tragedy happened and the classmate went \”crazy\”. We all found it incredible and felt sorry for the tragic life of our classmates. The teacher said that this situation is not crazy, as long as timely treatment and medication are enough. Because he once had a student who was in the same situation. Her parents took her very seriously and took her to see a psychiatrist in time.It was treated in time and it was cured later without recurrence. So why are my classmates like this? According to classmates, after her parents took her home, they saw that her behavior was normal, and they thought she was just thinking too much. They also thought that the teacher and classmates were exaggerating the situation, so they did not take her to see a doctor, nor did they have any treatment for her. Too much attention. So the tragedy happened. I kind of understand what her parents said and they didn\’t see any difference. Because after I had a conversation with my classmate after she had these auditory hallucinations, she still thought clearly and was very logical. If it weren\’t for what her roommates said, I would have even suspected that they were telling lies. As society develops, our parenting knowledge must be updated. If parents cannot keep up with the situation and continue to use the old thinking to raise their children, they will definitely fall into trouble. If the child\’s parents lack psychological knowledge and either cannot see the child\’s problems, or cannot do anything about the child\’s problems once they see it, and do not know what to do, it will delay the guidance and help of the child, and even cause lifelong regrets. My classmate is a lifelong regret! How could my classmate have such psychological problems when he was in his beautiful youth? This is not an isolated case. Nowadays, the psychological problems of teenagers are becoming increasingly serious. I am surrounded by a group of high school students who are in their prime. After one semester, the psychological problems we discovered among the students can be described in one word as \”various.\” Teachers all lamented, what’s wrong with today’s children? Why so fragile? Why are you so stingy? Why is your temper so weird? The psychological problems of teenagers can not be summed up as \”shocking\”. This is not unrelated to the transformation of society. Since the reform and opening up, due to various changes brought about by economic and social development such as economic transformation, social transformation, cultural diversity, and prominent contradictions, my country\’s youth education has encountered unprecedented impacts and challenges. This is followed by an increase in psychological distress and psychological problems among teenagers. A survey shows that among primary and secondary school students in my country, about 1/5 of children and adolescents have psychological and behavioral problems of varying degrees. Such as selfishness, willfulness, dislike of learning, truancy, lying, cheating, withdrawal, anxiety, depression, stealing, aggression, poor frustration tolerance, Internet and other explicit and implicit psychological and behavioral problems. These psychological and behavioral problems not only seriously affect the healthy development of children and adolescents, but also bring huge impact and trouble to families and society. If the child\’s parents have knowledge of psychology, they can play a positive and effective role in helping the child in improving learning ability, cultivating ideological and moral character, and communicating in interpersonal relationships. On the contrary, it will delay the guidance and help of the children, and even cause lifelong regrets. The ultimate result of raising children is not only to make them grow up safely and healthily, but also to make them mature and strong in psychology, personality and other aspects, with a view to cultivating the children into outstanding talents with comprehensive development of morality, intelligence, body and beauty. For the healthy growth of their children, it is urgent for parents to learn psychological knowledge.
You are Here
- Home
- Parenting knowledge
- Preschool period
- If parents don’t know a little bit about psychology, it will be difficult for them to educate their children.