If this is \”doting\”, I am willing to love a little more

I recently bought a few bookshelves for my son because I really can’t fit the books at home. What to do with the extra large wrapping paper boxes? Because the small warehouse downstairs is almost full, I really can’t find a place to put it. The fish mother has always been neater than me, so she said she would sell them all. Gosh! Such an interesting cardboard box can be sold at a recycling house for less than 5 yuan, which makes me unwilling to accept it. Besides, my son has already started playing. Together with his little cousin, he overturned a large box, and then the two of them got in, saying that this was their house. Then there is their own small warehouse and kitchen. The largest one can also be used as a \”small shop\” to sell my son\’s favorite fried chicken legs. Seeing that the children liked it so much, I naturally kept all the boxes with all my persuasion. The fish mother couldn\’t help but said that I was too doting on my children. You have to find a way to collect these boxes yourself. Anyway, don\’t occupy the aisles of the warehouse. So when the children were playing, I moved them out one by one for them to play with, and after playing, I moved them one by one to the warehouse compartment. Seeing children happily playing with these cardboard boxes made me willing to do something. Wilde said: \”I imagine that all charming people are spoiled, and this is the secret of their attraction.\” If this is \”pampering\”, I would love a little more. At the dinner table, my son said he didn\’t want to eat and was full. Grandma came over anxiously and said, \”Eat more, eat more, grow taller, and don\’t go hungry.\” \”I\’m full!\” \”You only ate so little, how come you\’re full?\” \”I really don\’t want to. Eat.\” I said, \”Mom, forget it if he doesn\’t eat. He said he was full.\” Then my son ran away quickly. \”You just know how to spoil him. If you say you don\’t want to eat, you won\’t eat! How can that work?\” \”He said he was full, so he must be full. A child of this age knows how to feel.\” Then the same goes for dressing. Sometimes a child insists on wearing a gray dress because he feels it fits and is comfortable. But the old man thought it was ugly and asked the child to take it off. The child became angry and firmly disagreed. Sometimes when the old man gets angry, he will be aggressive. This is often the time when I will appear. \”Come on, daddy will put it on for you. I also think this dress looks pretty good. I listen to you today and just wear this one. Tomorrow we can try on the one grandma found for you, okay?\” \”Okay!\” I My mother got angry and said that I doted on my children. Sometimes when the children wake up from a nap, they find that grandma is not there, and grandma often goes to the kitchen or the toilet. The child would shout \”Grandma, Grandma, come!\” often with a crying tone. It\’s normal to feel angry when you wake up, but not many people can handle it. So every time my mother said very unhappy, \”I\’m here, I just know how to cry. Why are you crying?\” The child cried even louder. If I were at home, I would go over and talk to him when he had just woken up, and if he needed it, I would hold him tightly. Every time this happens, it will be fine after a hug. And I find that every time I hold my son now, he is very excited and hugs me tightly. Maybe it’s because I always say that the four-year-old has grown up and can’t always ask his father to hold him. So every time I go to take a shower, I still have to hold her tightly. When I see a scary movie, I always run into my arms. He needs my pampering love, and I also like to hold him in my armsNeck feeling. Children\’s little emotions need to be comforted, and their little world needs to be noticed and understood. If this is \”pampering\”, I would love a little more. Children initially love their parents, then as they grow older they judge their parents; and then sometimes, they forgive their parents. A few days ago, a friend left a message saying, \”When we were young, the parenting theory was that everything was the fault of the children. Finally it was our turn to be parents, but the parenting theory became that everything was the fault of the parents. How sad~\” Actually, I I don’t think it’s sad at all, at least not for a child. Perhaps, it is our own tragedy, because when we were young, there were too few children who could be understood and respected by their parents. Our generation is not a spoiled generation, but a generation that lacks love. In the past years of reform and opening up, rapid economic development, and rapid social transformation, the love our parents gave their children was not enough. And to this day, it is still the case. There are still many families with left-behind children, intergenerational education, and absent parents. When we become parents, we find ourselves educating our children using the same methods our parents used to teach us, and we are surprised to find that our children are also suffering the same things we suffered when we were children. We find that the relationship we had with our parents in childhood has now been internalized into our own internal relationship patterns, which determine our life-long character and destiny. If you get abundance and freedom from your parents, you will be more happy as an adult. The lack and heaviness of parents will make children restricted and feel heavy. Therefore, many people who were raised in poverty when they were young will not feel rich even when they grow up. Instead, they will feel empty, because the lack they experienced when they were young can never be made up for. Therefore, when parents discover their own mistakes, it is not a tragedy, but a kind of progress, because we increasingly respect the child as an independent person, understand the child\’s nature more and more, and pay more and more attention to the learning and improvement of the parents themselves. Why are we afraid to \”love\” our children? That\’s because you\’re not sure about your own love, you\’re anxious about yourself, and you don\’t know anything about your children. What kind of families are more likely to raise spoiled children? I once saw a case: a mother was heartbroken for her adult child, and she had to see a psychologist. The psychological counselor asked her, \”When your child ties his shoelaces, he always ties them into knots. Have you ever bought your child shoes with shoelaces in the future?\” The mother nodded. \”When the child washed the dishes for the first time, his clothes got wet. Did you stop letting him go near the sink?\” \”Yes.\” \”The first time the child dressed himself, it almost took 10 to button a button. How many minutes, and then you scold him for being clumsy?\” The mother was surprised, \”How did you know?\” The psychological counselor then said, \”Your child is looking for a job after graduating from college, and you relied on your own connections to help him find a job? \”The mother was even more shocked and asked the consultant how he knew so much. \”Madam, I know it from that shoelace.\” \”What should I do?\” \”When he is sick, you take him to the hospital. When he is getting married, you\’d better prepare a house for him; he doesn\’t have it. When he wants money, you\’d better give him money. This is your best choice in the future. Otherwise, INothing can be done. \”Faced with such a situation, I don\’t think anyone will come up with a good solution. When the child tries to take steps for the first time and wants to do something, it is you who restrains his hands and feet. When the child needs you When you understand him, understand him, and support him, you ignore his feelings. Many parents, like this mother, shelter their children. Let the children lose the opportunity to try, make mistakes and make corrections during their growth. Never let go, everything is taken care of Parents will raise a doting child who will never wean off the milk. Therefore, whether the child is truly loved or doted on, it often depends on what the parents are doing. We often talk about rules, but rules without love are shackles. We also talk about love, But doting is the cancer of love. Of course, we are more concerned about how to love our children? Whether you are a mother or a father, or you are about to become a parent, you must love your children boldly. Don’t be afraid of other people’s gossip, do not worry at all. Love without reservation and without utilitarian purposes. Sometimes, we have to love our children more like doting. Because this is understanding, understanding, and companionship. It is the real love that children long for.