A few days ago, a mother left a message saying that her three-year-old son always likes to be hugged by his mother, but she thinks boys should not be so clingy and should be more independent. So sometimes I deliberately ignored him. Unexpectedly, my son got angry and punched and kicked his mother. I don’t know what happened? We always have some expectations for the boys. For example, I hope they can be braver, more independent, and more confident. So when a boy shrinks from a challenge, he will say: \”Boy, be brave, hurry up, hurry up.\” And when the boy acts coquettishly and begs for a hug, he feels confused again, \”Should I respond or not?\” ? Is it okay for a boy to be so clingy?\” Especially when a boy wants to cry, someone always says, \”Man, you can\’t cry! You\’re so embarrassed.\” Sometimes, it\’s obviously the girl who robbed the boy\’s things. \”You are a boy, so you have to give in. Why are you trying to grab something from a girl?\” It would be even worse if a boy grabbed something from a girl. \”How can you steal a girl\’s things? You have to protect the girl!\” In fact, little boys are often no match for girls, and they don\’t know what to do. If there are boys in the family, parents are bound to have to worry more. On the way to growth, please remember to give boys three kinds of nutrition. Please remember to give the boy a loving hug. Don\’t think that hugging is a way for girls to get close to their parents. In fact, boys are more eager for your hugs. And, a hug has miraculous healing properties. There is a story in \”Positive Discipline\”: a young father was deeply frustrated and troubled because his 4-year-old son always had sudden tantrums. Rebuke and punishment only make it worse. This dad learned that a misbehaving child is a disappointed child and that encouragement is the best way to deal with bad behavior. From this dad\’s point of view, it seems a bit like rewarding bad behavior. However, he decided to give it a try. When his little one had another tantrum, the dad got down on one knee and yelled, \”I need a hug!\” The kid was stunned, sobbing and asked, \”What?\” Dad said. shouted again: \”I need a hug!\” His son stopped sobbing for a long time before asking in disbelief: \”Now?\” The father said: \”Yes, now!\” The son looked completely confused, but he stopped He started crying and said a little reluctantly: \”Okay.\” Then he stiffly gave his father a hug. Soon the stiffness disappeared and father and son melted into each other\’s arms. After a while, the father said: \”Thank you, this is exactly what I need.\” The son\’s lips trembled slightly and said: \”Me too.\” I have always believed in the power of encouragement and hugs. Every time the little fish makes his little smile When I have a bad temper, as long as it is not a matter of principle, I will squat down and pick him up. I remember when he was more than two years old, he woke up at noon and found no one in the house. He will burst into tears. Sometimes I would go to the next room to work while he was napping. Hearing such annoying crying makes me really want to lose my temper. But I still patiently picked him up, put him in my arms, and sat in front of the desk. He watched me type, and soon he would calm down. Because he already knew that his father was at work. But if IIf he loses his temper every now and then, he will cry and I will lose control of my anger. A little hug solved this problem perfectly. Sometimes they just need a little bit of this kind of privilege and pampering, and we as parents can definitely give it to them. Especially little boys, their emotions are more fragile than girls and need more care. They are not as good as girls in many ways. Even now he is five years old. Still longing for my hug. I know, it\’s not because I\’m lazy and coquettish, but because I like the feeling of being nestled in my father\’s arms. Physical contact and expressions of love are important ways for boys to feel safe. Boys who are accompanied by their parents when they are young and receive sufficient attention and love will have a stronger sense of security and will be mentally healthier as adults. You know, the first things boys need to learn are intimacy, trust, warmth, joy, and kindness. Rather than cold dogma and various labels. The affection a child experiences at an early age will help him survive impulsive adolescence more smoothly, balancing his adventurous and competitive nature. And when they grow up, it will be easier to take care of their wives and children. Give each boy plenty of exercise time. Every boy needs physical activity to help release the restlessness caused by hormonal changes. Because the Creator \”added\” testosterone to boys that is 15 times higher than that of girls, while serotonin, which makes people calm, is much lower in boys than in girls. Therefore, boys are naturally more impulsive, adventurous, and aggressive than girls. Children need wide space and free movement, and they rely on exercise and climbing to develop their brains healthily. On the premise of ensuring children\’s safety as much as possible, we should stimulate children\’s natural spatial judgment ability and strengthen their muscles and bones. Encourage your boy to participate in more sports and run more outdoors. The comprehensive experience of various senses will bring him healthier development. Please accept that boys are different. Accept his unique language, even if it is sometimes vicious. If there are boys in the family, mothers will have a headache for their swear words or \”evil words\”. A mother told me that her 5-year-old son often said \”kill you.\” She found it very scary that such a young child was talking about beating and killing. So every time she heard it, she reacted greatly, reasoning with the child, and sometimes beating and scolding him. But the son got worse and even said he wanted to kill himself. In fact, the \”curse sensitive period\” will appear after the child is 3 years old, which can be regarded as a special manifestation of the \”language sensitive period\”. Children in this period are very enthusiastic about absorbing and using language, and they are even more interested in swearing and harsh words. They like to use these powerful words, because this can trigger a stronger response from the listener, draw attention to themselves, and achieve their own goals. So, don’t think that your children are hurtful by bad words. In fact, they can’t experience your feelings yet. I didn\’t mean to hurt you. Accept the boy\’s emotions. Compared with girls, boys have weaker expressive abilities. When they encounter bad emotions, they are more likely to vent their anger through tantrums or physical attacks. And when boys get excited, they will use their hands instead of their mouths. rememberThere must be one time when I say show cartoons. The nephew and son became excited. The elder brother just slapped the younger brother\’s butt several times. The little guy came to complain, saying that his brother had beaten him. I actually saw them both cheering and he was throwing the dinosaur toys around. The elder brother just slapped his younger brother a few times. Due to the effects of testosterone in the body, boys are more aroused than girls and need to be released more. Therefore, when they are happy or in a bad mood, they will slam doors, throw things, and yell. In fact, this is normal behavior for young men as they grow up. It can be understood as a unique behavioral language, and parents must learn how to interpret it. Then accept it patiently and tell them how to express it. For example, you need to be careful to keep quiet in public places and not disturb others. And when you feel uncomfortable, you can punch the pillow or the sofa, but you can\’t hit anyone. You can also sit there and think about it quietly. One day, you will find that the little kid is not as close to you as before, but this does not mean that he is alienated from you from the heart. It just means that the boy has grown up and he hopes to become a man who does not rely on his parents. . What we have to do is to love them well during the validity period of being parents. Raise a warm boy with light in his eyes and love in his heart.
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