If you want your child to obey you, you must first make him proud!

There was a recent survey. What do children think of parents who make them proud? To sum it up in modern words, it is: \”Less preaching, smile more; know a little about computers, put on light makeup, read some books, read newspapers, have an elegant temperament, and respond to requests.\” Although this sounds like It sounds a bit absurd, but it also allows parents to understand their shortcomings in the eyes of modern children from one side. If you think about it carefully, some of the above requirements are actually very reasonable. For example, preaching less is exactly the reason why children are dissatisfied with some parents\’ improper teaching methods such as exhorting preaching, asking preaching, and urging preaching. The reluctance to listen to these sermons shows that children are advancing with the times and growing with the progress of society. On the contrary, most parents have not kept up with their children\’s minds, remain unchanged, and always use their own Use old experience to educate a new generation of children. How can this be effective? Another example is that children want parents to read books and newspapers. In fact, there are objective reasons. According to surveys, 70% of parents and children cannot achieve good communication. It is precisely because parents are not knowledgeable enough and do not understand some of the emerging cultural concepts in society. Or lack of understanding of life concepts, resulting in no common language with the new generation of children, causing children to look up to their parents instead of looking down on them. Therefore, parents must move closer to their children, find things of common interest, learn together, and enter the world of their children. Only in this way can these children Guys speak from their hearts. In addition, parents should also understand that education is always a two-way street. If you want to raise a child that makes your parents proud, you must first be a parent that makes your child proud. Society is developing rapidly and concepts are being updated day by day. However, many parents place all their good expectations on their children, thus neglecting to improve their own quality. As everyone knows, this is an irrational concept of raising children, and it can also be said to be the root of the failure of family education. If you hope that you will be proud of your child tomorrow, then your child should be proud of you today. Therefore, those parents who have high demands and expectations for their children should first ask themselves, if you ask your children to do this or that, are you yourself Will they all do it? For example, if you ask your children to take time to study, what do you do with your spare time every day? Should I watch TV or read a book? You require your children to stay at the top of the class in exams, but do you also perform well in your workplace? In fact, only parents who can make progress with their children are parents worthy of their children\’s pride. Letting parents become the pride of their children does not mean that parents should get a lot of satisfaction from their children, but when parents become the pride of their children, the children will naturally regard their parents as role models for learning, and the children will There is a certain difference between subtly changing oneself under the influence of parents\’ every move and being a role model for children. If parents can become the pride of their children, children\’s observation of their parents\’ words and deeds will not be limited to subconscious imitation. It\’s about actively copying, and this kind of learning is the most effective. The following summary is the experience of \”bad\” parents: Only when parents are frank can children be honest; if parents are understanding, children can be tolerant; if parents smile, children can be happy; if parents are friendly, children can be kind; if parents are motivated, children can be tenacious and hardworking; if parents are full of confidence, children can be confident and unyielding. So, how can parents make their children proud? \”Bad\” parents have some unique \”bad tricks\”. For example, if parents want their children to obey their words and believe them to be the truth, then they must make their children respect their parents\’ abilities, that is, they must gain their children\’s trust. , parents must make their children admire you in at least one aspect, so that they feel that you are very tall and can often say things like \”My dad is really capable, he knows everything\”, \”My mom is really great, everyone praises her.\” \”When the words are on your lips, your children will naturally listen to you. But if parents often do wrong things, their children will think that you are not very reliable, and adults are just like that; or if you do things that you shouldn\’t do, even if they are small things, if they accumulate little by little, your children will feel that The direct consequence of looking down on you is that they no longer believe in your authority. Such family education is undoubtedly a failure. Parents are the backing of their children. There is an old saying that no matter how old a child is, he is still a child in the eyes of his parents. Although \”bad\” parents may not take care of their children meticulously, they make their children feel trustworthy and will not forcefully restrict what their children do, but will provide help and guidance when necessary. If a child does not trust his or her parents enough, or the parent-child relationship is not good, when parents help or remind the child, it will arouse the child\’s resentment. Only when the parent-child relationship is good will the child accept what the parents say. This is successful communication education. It is also an important difference between successful \”bad\” parents and those who do not know how to teach. If you want your children to feel proud of you, in addition to being worthy of their children\’s trust, \”bad\” parents can also try some \”unexpected\” or \”innovative\” actions to win their children\’s respect and respect. Beloved. For example, there was once a father who helped clean the corridors of the entire community every weekend, and used this as a way to \”show off\”. He often asked his children to be his supporters and spectators during the general cleaning. This kind of \”showing off\” brought about The biggest gain is that the children can often hear uncles and aunts from the neighbors praising their father for his hard work, public consciousness, and enthusiasm for doing things. The children feel that although their father\’s behavior is a bit \”maverick\”, it is very worthy of pride, and over time they will also Rushing to help. There are many such parents around us. They often spend a lot of money, go through a lot of hardships and go through all kinds of twists and turns for their children\’s further education or school selection, but they are still happy to do it. Their always and only purpose is to let their children enjoy the best. educate. It is certainly important to create a good learning environment for children, but this kind of \”teaching by words\” in the classroom cannot replace the \”teaching by example\” of parents. As the saying goes, like father, like son, although the words are a bit absolute, they are enough to prove the influence of parents on their children. Parents’ example is actually a life classroom for their children, which often determines their future.Qualitative influence. Take a look at the following two things, which may also inspire parents: Mr. Li, who works at a commercial bank in Wuhan, accidentally lost his wallet and other valuables while playing on the river beach in Wuhan. A brother whom he had never met found Mr. Li\’s belongings. In order to educate his children, he took his daughter and took the initiative to return the lost items to Mr. Li. My brother said: \”I returned this bag today, and my daughter will remember it for the rest of her life…\” On a street in front of Beijing Railway Station, a father and son once appeared with a sign of \”Free Guidance\” to guide tourists on a voluntary basis. . After understanding, the old man is the chairman of a language and cultural center in Beijing. He is usually very busy. During the May Day holiday, he deliberately squeezed out time to take his son to do charity work, so that his son can grow up through practical training. The action of the father and son also led many other enthusiasts to join the ranks. Although the above two incidents are not earth-shattering, they are enough to make people feel the good intentions of the two fathers in educating their children. As the saying goes, teaching by example is more important than teaching by words. In fact, it is not difficult to make your children proud of you. As a parent, you only need to set an example by your own words and deeds, and use correct and positive actions to influence their outlook on life and the world. . A practical action is better than endless preaching. Parents do not need earth-shattering feats to make their children proud. Many times, seemingly ordinary words and small actions can often inspire children. \”Bad\” parents know how to praise themselves in front of their children at the appropriate time, so that their children can learn from their own shining points. This is effective \”hereditary\”. If you want your children to be proud of you, you must be proud of something, but please remember not to brag about how rich you are in front of your children. This is the only aspect that is not suitable for showing off.