In order to allow her children to be admitted to Peking University, my mother has been a \”tiger mother\” for 20 years!

During the summer vacation, a picture circulated in the circle of friends went viral: the summer schedule made by Peking University mothers for their children. Controversy arose for a while, whether to raise children rich or poor? Strict education or happy education? Opinions vary. But someone gave a direct answer: Only through strict education can children become talented. The following is a letter from a mother, introducing her experience in parenting for more than 20 years. Strong desire: My children can become masters. Let me first talk about myself. I graduated from high school. My cultural level is not very high, and I have never done anything to make myself proud of in my life. The only thing I am proud of is that I raised an excellent son. He is currently studying at Peking University Guanghua School of Management and will go to a prestigious American university to study for graduate school next year. Ever since my child was born, I have made one thought: Son, you must become a leader among men. I hope that, child, you cannot be an ordinary person like your parents. Your life should be colorful, as unique as reaching up to the sky to embrace the bright moon. Devil\’s training: You have to become a top student. When my son was in kindergarten, I didn\’t interfere too much with his learning. The father of the child paid more attention here. It wasn\’t until he entered elementary school that I started the road of education known as the \”tiger mother\” with a tough attitude. ➤About homework: Establish study schedule, efforts and methods. The first thing when my son comes home, I will let him do his homework first. The child is alone in the study room. No one can disturb him here. The son cannot go to the toilet or drink water. Correct rate of time spent on grade-level study assignments Extracurricular homework Primary school 1 hour 98% 2 hours reading/1 hour Mathematical Olympiad Junior high school 1.5 hours 90% 1 hour reading/2 hours Mathematical Olympiad, Physics High school 2 hours 80% 1 hour reading/2 hours Mathematics, Physics and above table It is my son’s study time allocation table from elementary school to high school. In fact, he spent a lot of time on extracurricular homework, especially during physics and mathematics competitions in middle and high school. Therefore, the work schedule and study schedule I set for my son are more specific than the Peking University mother above. Making a schedule can help children develop the habit of self-discipline. Nowadays, most of us adults don’t have self-discipline and don’t know how to organize our time, let alone children! There are many reasons for excellence, but self-discipline is a necessary condition. Good habits must be cultivated from an early age. Now that my son is in college, he arranges his study and life strictly according to his own schedule. This greatly improves the efficiency of time utilization. If he fails to complete his study plan or makes mistakes in life, then I will punish him. ➤Means of punishment: no dinner, penalty runs, no entertainment on weekends, etc. Including high-pressure tactics such as palm slapping, swearing, and threats, which I never reject or feel distressed by. Some people will refute me, isn\’t this corporal punishment? Domestic violence? Child abuse? of course not! For a child whose mind is not yet mature, pain is the best way to make him/her remember deeply. So what I have always implemented is: when children are ignorant, discipline is necessary! And they have to be disciplined severely. The neighbor\’s house has a swimming pool in the yard, and his son and the neighbor\’s children often play together on weekends. My son has been allergic to disinfectant since he was a child. He couldn\’t resist the temptation and played in the pool for more than half an hour. When I came back in the evening, my son\’s body was covered with red spots. I was so angry that my eyes turned red: You want to play, right?? Let you have enough fun today. With that said, he dragged him into the swimming pool and soaked him for another hour. At night, the cold water reflected my son\’s pale face, which made me feel uncomfortable. This fever and body redness and swelling taught my son a profound lesson. From now on, my son will never go into the swimming pool easily again. ➤A must-have for top academics: Efforts and methods under high pressure. Before I became a mother, I would envy other people’s children for how smart they were and how well they scored perfect marks on exams. But after careful observation, every child actually has about the same IQ, and the reason for the huge difference in their performance is nothing more than two points: effort and method. So I asked my son to listen hard, do homework hard, and master certain skills and methods. And set a goal for him not to fall behind the top five in his grade in every exam. I firmly believe that when there is pressure, there is motivation, and when there is motivation, there is progress. Take my son as an example. In the first semester of fourth grade, he passed the exam and passed the tenth grade! I promised him that if he can get into the top three in the next final exam, he can go to his grandma\’s house for three days during the winter vacation. Instead, go to cram school obediently. Later, my son came first in the final exam, and I kept my promise. Although high-pressure education can bring pressure, this pressure can be turned into motivation, which can exercise children\’s endurance and brainpower. Because of the high-pressure education environment, children always want to do better and stand out. Therefore, high-pressure education is a tool to tap into one\’s own potential, allowing children to continuously strive and break through themselves. This is the same as adults who thrive under pressure at work. If you don\’t push a child, how do you know he is not a genius? He can\’t? Comprehensive development: Excellence is a habit. Under my high-pressure education, my son’s academic performance did not fall below the top five in grade. My son took a cupboard full of trophies from the National Primary School Mathematical Olympiad, middle and high school physics competitions, mathematics competitions, computer competitions and other subject competitions. In addition to studying, I also deliberately cultivated his interests and expertise. When my son was in the third grade of elementary school, I enrolled him in a piano class. When you first learn, you must practice for one hour every day before going to bed. Once you are proficient, the practice time will be increased to 2 hours. During the piano learning process, my son once wanted to give up and even deliberately broke the piano. Without saying a word, I smashed the piano to pieces. He was punished by kneeling down and not eating or drinking. I accompanied him on his hunger strike throughout the whole process of being punished by kneeling. After he figured it out, I bought another piano. Now he has passed the piano test to level 10, and he is relatively good at calligraphy, Go, etc. compared with his peers. Hand over a happy childhood and give your children a successful life in the future. It can be said that everything I have done has laid a good foundation for my children\’s future development. During this period, my husband questioned my approach: What you want your children to learn now may not be useful in the future? Books become less useful when they are used, and the same goes for skills. I can\’t be sure of what my child will look like in the future, but I can be sure: the more he knows and knows, the better his future will be. 6 house rules in my family, especially when it comes to children’s education, I refuse to budge. Even if the child\’s grandparents came to plead for mercy, I would not be moved. Not to mention intergenerational education, establishing authority for children is the first step in strict education. In the living room, study room, and children’s bedroom at home, I framed the 6 house rules I made, and they are all in one place.One hanging. These 6 house rules not only supervise yourself, but also remind your children. Six family rules 1. Each test score must not fall behind the top 5 in grade 2. Must practice skills every day (mainly piano and calligraphy) 3. No staying up late or sleeping in 4. Get up every morning and run for half an hour 5. Before college No love allowed 6. Family travel once a month. There are family rules and state laws. To be honest, these rules are just as difficult and difficult for me to stick to as it is for my son. Fortunately, my son is now much better than the children around him, and my wish has been achieved. After that, when he goes to a foreign country, he will face a bigger world, shine brightly, and live a wonderful life of his own. About Tiger Mom: Who understands my painstaking efforts? ➤Oh, you are so strict with your children, how cruel! I just want to respond to him: Can the education of children from ordinary families be happy? I never believe in happy education, this is just irresponsible to children! You provide happy education and quality education, and you feel happy for a while, but he will accomplish nothing in the future. How do you explain it? A moment of weakness now will lead to endless regrets in the future! In China\’s current environment, happy education is only played by the second generation of rich people and the second generation of officials. Children from working-class families should learn honestly and work hard. Education, like life, is originally a hard work, and it is the same all over the world. Whoever can enjoy the hard work is the one who has the ability. ➤You are so authoritarian and forceful, do your children still have freedom? Will it be mentally unhealthy? In the third grade of junior high school, my son was in puberty and very rebellious. I once made it clear to my son: Don’t talk to me about freedom until you become independent. Freedom is the reward of independent personality. If the child can be mentally and financially independent, I have nothing to worry about and I will give up immediately. Everyone is concerned about mental health. Sorry, my son is very cheerful. He is warm, smart and popular. Go out and party often with friends. Now he will share his college life, his girlfriend, etc. with us, and the family is enjoying themselves. As for the \”inferiority\”, \”introversion\”, \”masochistic tendencies\”, \”mental problems\” and other conditions you mentioned, I didn\’t see any in him. From now on, I will gradually let go of my son’s education. Because, I believe he will definitely stand on his own and become an excellent person. I have never regretted being a \”tiger mother\”. The above are my true feelings after being a mother for 20 years. If you agree, welcome to communicate with me, and I hope my experience can help you. There is never a shortcut to success, only hard work and hard work