Letting children grow at their own pace is more important than outperforming others.

In this era of unprecedented development of online media, many talented young people are gradually being seen by the public. These deeds illustrate the strength of Houlang and the promising future of the motherland. There is no doubt that this is a joy. Outstanding young people have set good examples and inspired other children to be proactive. They are worth leading our children to understand. But the successful deeds of many young people may also bring anxiety to a certain extent. What we are going to talk about today is the other side of the matter. 01In this era, we are suffering from the \”young people have success\” mania. Whether it is the media, schools or society, they all admire examples of young people who have become talents. Of course, there is nothing wrong with praising and encouraging the achievements of these teenagers. All types of achievements deserve public recognition and praise. But under the over-hyping of teenagers’ achievements, test scores, and glamorous jobs, it seems that if we or our children fail to excel in the college entrance examination, enter a top school, or find their first job in a prestigious company, we are somehow wrong. If you fail, you are doomed to accept the fate of running with you for the rest of your life. This atmosphere brings anxiety, and parents are willing to use various methods to let their children get ahead of others and show super-level wisdom or talents in advance. Training institutions have grasped these psychology and started to add fuel to the flames. Various early childhood training institutions are popping up all over China. Not only that, admission to well-known institutions requires an audition. Previously, in March, CCTV exposed the resumes of two preschool children. One of them can complete mixed operations of addition, subtraction, multiplication and division of numbers within a hundred. He attended the top innovation class in the Mathematical Olympiad of an institution. He also passed the Cambridge English KET exam and knew 2,000 Chinese characters. Even so, he failed to pass the audition. Another child with a similar level passed the audition because he got a high score of 145 in the Chinese Academy of Sciences IQ test. This report also caused all the IQ test quotas at the Institute of Psychology, Chinese Academy of Sciences. Some parents will take their children to take the test repeatedly until they get high scores. According to the staff of the Psychology Institute, March to July is the peak season every year, and many parents will make appointments two or three months in advance. Because this period is the \”window period\” for promotion from elementary school to elementary school and from elementary school to junior high school, many children are waiting for this highlight on their resumes. The same is true in the United States. Atlas International School has launched a \”Full Immersion Second Language Course\” for 3-year-old children. Columbia Grammar School in New York allows three- and four-year-old children to run back and forth between three libraries, six music rooms, and seven art studios. The only goal of these educations is to \”prepare children for their future and send them to prestigious universities.\” 02 Genius boy, life experience is not smooth sailing. However, becoming a genius at a young age can guarantee smooth sailing in life thereafter and lay the foundation for success? Since the two founders were both top students who graduated from Stanford and achieved extremely high scores in the SAT test, Google was once superstitious about the advantages of young people. In the first two years of its founding, Google hired many young computer scientists and math prodigies, but the result was too many people with analytical minds and too few employees with artistic sense and common sense. In the end, costly mistakes were made in the design of Google\’s homepage. Google finally admitsRealize that having a high SAT score and a prestigious school degree are not enough to predict an employee\’s career success. In addition, excessive efforts will destroy the original genius. In 1978, China established its first youth class, hoping that through this method it could better cultivate potential talents earlier and better. Among them, among the first batch of students selected, Ning Bo, Xie Yanbo and Gan Zheng soon became well-known prodigies. However, decades later, Ning Bo became a monk, and Xie Yanbo had a quarrel with his mentor at Princeton, and became mentally ill during his political career. Of course, there are many other alumni who have achieved good development in the corporate world, science and education, academia and finance, but what this proportion is and whether it is related to their extraordinary IQ is still open to question. Similarly, after the end of World War I, the United States also selected 1,200 children with high IQs across the country in order to cultivate a pool of talent. Finally, the 800 people who performed best among them basically did not become scientists. The 400 people who were successful according to the secular definition had in common that they all had perseverance and good personality traits. In addition, according to statistics, among truly high-IQ people, the proportion of psychopaths (suffering from severe mental illness) is as high as 4.2%, which is dozens of times higher than that of people with ordinary IQs. Children with truly extraordinary abilities often face problems such as being out of tune with their peers, being bullied at school, and suffering from depression. 03 Everyone has their own pace of growth. Don’t help your children plan an inappropriate path too early. At the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics, the sweet-looking Lin Miaoke gained public attention with her song \”Singing the Motherland\”. After that, Lin Miaoke continued to appear on stage and perform on strange occasions with his mother as the matchmaker. He wore age-inappropriate clothes, appeared on the catwalk of a bar, and acted as a couple with a 37-year-old uncle on TV… Many artists have hinted at Lin Miaoke\’s mother and children. You should still go back to school and live a normal child\’s life. But the mother declined these suggestions on the grounds that \”her daughter loves performing and is happy to participate in activities.\” On the other side, it was later revealed that the girl Yang Peiyi, who was acting as a voice substitute because she was having her teeth replaced at the time, also attracted multiple advertising invitations. But Yang Peiyi\’s father turned down all the invitations. He felt that since his daughter did not want to enter the film and television industry in the future, filming would be a waste of time. Because when he was young, Yang Peiyi once said that the life he wanted to live was to \”study when you should study, rest when you should rest, just like ordinary people.\” At the same time, he selected some Hong Kong compatriots for his daughter to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the founding of New China. Participate in charity evenings and other more advanced activities, so that your daughter who loves singing can broaden her horizons and enrich her spiritual world. At the age of 13, Yang Peiyi relied on her voice to join the Yang Hongnian Chorus, the only non-North American choir among the top ten children\’s choirs in the world. During the high school entrance examination, she entered the experimental class of the High School Affiliated to Renmin University of China. In 2017, Lin Miaoke failed the art test one after another. At this time, Yang Peiyi was participating in the American Academic Decathlon China Competition, and finally successfully advanced to the United States to participate in the finals. A reporter from \”People\” once wanted to interview Yang Peiyi, but was firmly rejected by her father. Taking a chance, the reporter asked, what is Yang Peiyi interested in now and in the future?Are you not considering developing into music at all? Her father responded at the time that of course he felt that his daughter had countless possibilities in the future, but now she needed to spend her 15-year-old summer vacation. After entering college, Lin Miaoke began to gradually regain his appearance at this age. In an interview, when asked what she wanted to do in college, she said that the first thing that came to her mind was what kind of clothes she could choose to wear. Rousseau once said: \”In the order of life, childhood has its place. Adults should be regarded as adults and children as children. Before becoming adults, children must be like children.\” 04 Written at the end of Emerging Research It shows that the full development of the prefrontal cortex, the processing center of the frontal lobe of the brain, usually occurs in a person\’s 20s or even later. Scientists\’ longitudinal studies of brain development have also found that many children\’s brains will not fully mature until they are at least 25 years old. With the development of technology, society requires us to continuously reshape our personal and professional development paths. Some people are lucky enough to have their skills discovered while still in school, but for most of us, it may take much longer before our potential is discovered, recognized or encouraged. Athletes born in the 2000s may have discovered their shooting talent because they never get tired of playing shooting games in shopping malls. As a child, they were energetic and liked to jump on the bed, so they were sent to learn diving. As a result, they gained early success in sports. Kudos, that\’s good. Scientist Tu Youyou only started researching malaria drugs at the age of 37. After hundreds of failures, there was no progress for 4 years. It was not until 48 years later that she made significant progress in research and won the Nobel Prize at the age of 85, which is also good. Everyone grows at his own pace of life. Cultivate, explore, encourage, and accompany children according to their own growth rhythm, and they will eventually receive the results of accumulation at different points in time. Sowing and harvesting will never happen in the same season. Raising a well-rounded child requires being able to withstand the loneliness in the middle, withstand temptations from time to time, and withstand temporary blows, as always. Before the harvest season comes, all we have to do is help our children develop their abilities step by step, observe their strengths and interests, and be the scaffolding for their growth.