No matter how angry you are, don’t say these things to your children.

Look at you like this, what can you do in the future? I went to a relative\’s house a few days ago. The relative regretted talking about his daughter. Because my daughter is timid and has low self-esteem, now that she has grown up, she always lowers her head when talking to others. In her words, she is timid and has no confidence in anything she does. Relatives said that what they regretted most was leaving their daughter at home. She has been used to living alone since she was a child, and her personality has become introverted and sensitive, a bit unsociable. But relatives said the person who hurt their daughter the most was actually her elementary school math teacher. After talking to her daughter several times, she learned that in those years the teacher would crack down on poor students every time the test results came out. She always said it in front of the whole class, pointed at them and said, \”Look at you like this, what can you do in the future?\” I can imagine that she must have lowered her head at that time and allowed the teacher to lecture her. Because now when she sees me, she often lowers her head. So sometimes when her mother wants me to talk to her, I am cautious. Childhood suffering often affects a person\’s life. If you fall or accidentally cut yourself, the scar will always heal. However, psychological trauma is often difficult to heal. Now, I encourage her to continue learning and believe in herself. But looking at her back, I still felt heartbroken. I wish I could have given her encouragement and guidance back then when the teacher\’s words made her feel frightened and depressed. Or say to the teacher: \”My life is still long, why do you say that!\” Zou Hong, a psychology professor at Beijing Normal University, pointed out: \”The verbal harm caused by peers or teachers will also cast a psychological shadow on the children. This shadow causes them to no longer believe in the outside world, and feels that this society is indifferent and vicious, creating a strong sense of rejection for society…\” You can not encourage a child, but you must not hurt him with words. a child. Because you never know how much harm your unintentional words will bring to him. Maybe you have been hurt by other people\’s words, but you can still find comfort and courage from your parents. But what about being beaten and hurt by your own parents? Such results are simply devastating for children. Many troubled teenagers are actually forced to become like this step by step by their parents. I still remember a set of pictures I saw before: Director Xie Yong once investigated six juveniles detained in the Shenyang Juvenile Detention Center and found that they had all suffered intensive and brutal verbal violence attacks from their parents: \”shameful\”, \”pig-brained\” \”, \”Trash\”, \”Why don\’t you die\”… These insults and complaints pushed them into endless darkness, where they suffered psychological torture and eventually led to a big mistake. Maybe many parents feel that they are not so harsh in what they say. Of course, in a calm situation, you may still be able to control it. But when you are angry, when you are influenced by your emotions. If there is any, it will still spurt out and hurt the child. I still remember one time I was shopping for shoes in a leather shoe store with my friends. Both the boss lady and the salesperson introduced the new leather shoes with a smile. I just took a look there. I saw a child squatting on a low cabinet doing homework. It didn\’t take long for the landlady to go over and take a look. \”What the hell are you writing? Kneel down and write for me.\” After reading it a few times, her expression became worse and worse, and she started scolding her.. Then he slammed the homework book on the table. As a result, the child stood there aggrievedly and refused to kneel. \”The man has gold under his knees. Let\’s move a chair and write.\” I said, \”You don\’t know, he doesn\’t take it seriously every time he does his homework. The words he writes are like symbols.\” I took a look at the place where the child did his homework. It is not suitable for him to sit upright and his arms cannot be straightened. It is difficult for anyone to write well in this situation. But the mother still gets angry and scolds her child for not doing his homework neatly. The impact of this learning environment on children was not considered. Many times children become their parents\’ exhaust pipes for no apparent reason. Sometimes, parents may think it\’s just a joke and their intentions are good. So I think I can talk about my children casually, and hitting them can make them better. During the Chinese New Year period in my hometown, one day my neighbor brought his son, who was about three years old, to play at home. A wall chart of children\’s cognition is posted on the wall in the living room. The kid was evasive when he first met us, and I thought he was just a little shy. When he saw the poster, he walked over and began to identify the cars on it. When he pointed to the image of a train, he asked his father: \”Dad, what kind of car is this?\” \”It\’s a train! I took you on a ride once, but you can\’t remember it. Your memory is so bad.\” \”Dad. \”Where is the head of this car?\” \”It\’s right here! You are really stupid, a stupid sheep.\” He nodded the child\’s head as he spoke. At this time, the child was a little unhappy, but did not say anything. \”The train has two ends,\” I interjected. \”There are two heads, but this is the head. You have to remember it!\” he said to his son. Then the child stopped playing and took his father\’s hand and went out. This simple conversation is something we often see. The adults may think that they just made a joke and did not hit or scold them, so it should be fine. But these attacks on children will only make them feel inferior. For example, this child’s nickname is Yangyang, and he likes adults to call him Pleasant Goat. But his father gave him the nickname Stupid Sheep. What will the child think inside? Perhaps, his evasive eyes had already given the answer. Many parents often say that their children have many problems and want to find ways to correct them. In fact, sometimes parents are sick but want to give their children medicine. Children are a mirror of the family. It not only reflects the family tradition, but also reflects the parents’ cultivation and character. There is a saying: \”A person\’s highest education is not to lose his temper with those close to him.\” Because the people closest to you will often tolerate you. Especially children, maybe they will love you no matter how cruel you are to them. But this doesn\’t give you the confidence to lose your temper and scold him. Just because your child loves you, you are also the one who can hurt him the most. As a parent, you also have tempers. Especially when you are so tired that you are about to lie down, but your child keeps crying. Or when the child still plays games on his mobile phone after he has said it countless times. When you are in a mood, countless harsh words will flow out of you, and you have to spit them out quickly to shock your children. However, good parents manage their tempers well. And be sure to keep your mouth shut and stay calm. Because if there is one, like a sharp blade, it can really \”kill people.\”