There is a saying in the book \”Raising Girls\”: \”As your daughter grows up, you can see the connection between the childhood you gave her and the strengths and qualities she has today.\” It is easy to waste a daughter. As long as they are pampered and free-range, it will be fine. But if you want to raise a girl with a sunny heart and a sharp edge, you must deliberately give her the \”Ten Practices in Life\” from an early age. Gladwell, a writer who practices self-discipline, wrote in \”Outliers\”: \”The reason why geniuses in people\’s eyes are extraordinary is not that they are superior in talent, but that they have made continuous efforts.\” Dong Qing, the former No. 1 sister of CCTV, is an incomparable Self-disciplined person. When she was a child, before dawn, Dong Qing would go for a morning jog at a nearby middle school, running 1 kilometer before stopping. When she started to learn to read, Dong Qing insisted on reciting and copying ancient poems every day. She also maintained a good habit of reading and counting. Year after year, I still find time to read for about an hour every day. Someone once said that Dong Qing was so powerful that it was God who rewarded him with food. But the so-called cheating life is nothing but hard work and extraordinary self-discipline. The writer Beauvoir once said: \”The misfortune of a woman is that she is not asked to work hard and go her own way, but is told that as long as she slides down, she can reach the paradise of bliss.\” For girls, only self-discipline can Only by learning 72 changes can we calmly cope with the 81 difficulties in life. What does a girl who practices a big pattern look like? I think she must not be trapped in one room or limited to small love affairs; she must have connotation, magnanimity, and be able to control her own life. Lin Huiyin, a talented woman from the Republic of China, was such a well-organized girl. She began to study poetry at the age of 5, and traveled to Europe with her father at the age of 16. During this period, she experienced mountains and rivers and read many literary works. During this period, she also established her dream of becoming an architect and had a career that she would strive for throughout her life. Therefore, if they want to help girls develop an overall perspective, parents should bring their girls to see more of the world from an early age: take their children to read more, watch more documentaries, understand other people’s experiences and lives, and help them break out of their narrow personal vision; on weekends and holidays, You can also take your children to travel more, go to museums and science and technology museums, and broaden your children\’s horizons in an all-round way, so that they can learn to look at problems from a higher level. In the end, it helps the girl shed her weak outer shell and forge a steel frame to fight against fate. Practice self-confidence. At the 2022 Beijing Winter Olympics, athlete Gu Ailing won 2 gold medals and 1 silver. And her great achievements are inseparable from her strong self-confidence. When Gu Ailing was 13 years old, she revealed in an interview: \”In all sports, including basketball, don\’t think about others doing better than you. Whether it\’s another boy or another girl, older or younger than you, you are the best.\” \”.\” With this tenacity, she survived multiple fractures and injuries and three concussions. Yes, only a sunny and confident girl has enough psychological energy to face the setbacks and difficulties in life. If parents want to make their daughters more confident and powerful, they might as well try the following two methods: Hit their children less in life. When she wants to try new things, parents should give her full encouragement and give her the confidence that \”you can do it well\”; secondly, avoid \”horizontal comparisons\” and use less \”\”Girl-like\” to restrict children. No child should be influenced by gender, but should focus on himself, so that life will have unlimited possibilities. Practice emotional stability Some time ago, I saw this news on the Internet: A 5-year-old little girl After discovering that her mother had fainted, she calmly dialed 120. After knowing that the doctor who came was an uncle, she quickly found some shorts for her mother to put on. Then, she contacted a female teacher who lived nearby to come to the house to help, and asked the teacher to deliver it to her. She went to kindergarten; finally, she called her father who was on a business trip to report the situation. This series of operations made the girl\’s mother sigh: Thank God for giving me a daughter who is emotionally stable and attentive. She can save lives in emergencies. ! Buffett said: \”Emotional stability is more important than high IQ. \”And a girl\’s emotional stability is always more important than a pretty face. If you break down and cry and get confused when something happens, how can you find the right path? If you want to cultivate a girl with stable emotions and a good mentality, For girls, parents must set an example first. When children make mistakes, they don’t necessarily have to yell. They can analyze the problem first and then discuss a solution with their children. When there are problems in the relationship between husband and wife, they don’t have to be tit-for-tat with each other. , you can also sit down and talk calmly. You must know that only when the parents\’ emotions are stable, girls will be more calm and calm, and be the master of their own emotions. How popular are people who practice \”thick-skinned\”? There is a gangster in the neighbor\’s house. As a little girl who is over 10 years old, when she was a child, whenever she met someone, no matter whether she knew them or not, she would take the initiative to say hello: \”Good morning, grandpa, hello aunt, hello uncle.\” \”Not only that, Cone is also very good at making friends. When she meets children she doesn\’t know, she can always \”strike up a conversation\” without any fear: \”Hello, can we be friends? \”It\’s too hot today. Are you hot?\” \”Sometimes, when others ignore her or treat her badly, she doesn\’t care at all. She just smiles and goes back to playing. Cone\’s mother always says that her daughter is naturally \”thick-skinned\”, but I envy her. A little bit. You know, a \”thick-skinned\” child often means a stronger psychological endurance. He dares to take the initiative to find topics in any social situation and dares to show himself to the outside world. Many girls nowadays are very good in all aspects, but the only The disadvantage is that she is too thin-skinned. She often cannot save face or open her mouth. Not only can she not make many friends, but she is also easily taken advantage of and disadvantaged in social interactions. So, how can parents have a \”thick-skinned\” daughter? You can take your child to public places more often, encourage her to speak, so that the child can accept and \”desensitize\” to the gaze of others; you can also tell the child some stories about \”cheeky\” girls, let the child imitate them, and cultivate the child\’s adverse quotient. In short, a \”thick-skinned\” girl will definitely become more courageous even if she suffers many setbacks in life. One of the most important abilities in practicing rejection of interpersonal communication is to learn to say \”no\”. Harvard University once did A survey: If a person learns to refuse reasonably, he can reduce more than 90% of unnecessary troubles, and can also reduce a lot of waste of personal time and energy. I remember once watching a short film called \”Attitude Doll. There is a girl named Ai Li. She has been a good girl since she was a child. She will do her best to keep a bright smile in front of others and never dare to refuse others. Even if someone kicked her goldfish tank and broke it, she would always smile and say, \”It doesn\’t matter, I\’ll just buy another one.\” Because she kept smiling, over time, Avery\’s face became a smiling face. Later, when she smashed her smiling face to find herself, she found that it was already empty. In life, we have seen too many girls like \”Aili\”, who have a quiet personality and rarely show their emotions. No matter how unreasonable the request is, they will not say \”no\” easily. They seem to be well-behaved and sensible, but they always sacrifice their own happiness and happiness to meet the expectations of others. However, as written in the book \”Thanks, But Not Today\”: In each stage of life, we have our own tasks that need to be completed, but one of the most important tasks is to realize the \”true self.\” Therefore, we must remember to tell our daughters: Never compromise yourself in order to meet other people’s expectations. Only by living the life you want can you live an extremely precious life. Practicing independence Teacher Fan Deng once shared a story: One of his friends paid great attention to cultivating his daughter\’s ability to solve problems independently. When she was 14 years old, the girl went to the United States to study. Before departure, she packed her luggage and flew alone for 27 hours. After arriving, she learned that children under the age of 15 were not allowed to fly alone in the United States, so the airport detained her. I thought she would panic, but she just called her parents and calmly said that she would solve the matter by herself. She first explained to the police that she did not understand the age limit, and then prepared a series of documents in accordance with local requirements to indicate that she was here to study. Later, the police let her go, and the captain admired her very much and invited her to take a photo with the crew. Independent children can do things well no matter where they go and are more recognized by others. Zhang Xiaoling wrote in the book \”Let the Child Be Himself\”: \”Independence can be divided into personality independence, spiritual independence, and life independence.\” To raise a daughter, these three are indispensable. You can let your daughter do some housework within her ability in life, let her children read more books, share their own ideas, listen carefully and provide encouragement when their children express their opinions. The quality of independence is a precious asset that parents give girls throughout their lives. Practice self-love French thinker Montaigne once said: Only those who love themselves can be loved by others. Do you still remember the 15-year-old girl who passed away while \”losing weight for love\” some time ago? Xiaoling, who had just entered the first grade of junior high school, started to lose weight desperately because she had a crush on a boy. From the beginning, it was only required to eat without adding oil, and gradually evolved into not eating any rice or staple food. As a result, Xiaoling was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa. She was 1.65 meters tall and her weight dropped to only 24.8 kilograms. Later, he was admitted directly to the ICU, and his life stopped at the age of 15. Self-love is a compulsory course for girls to learn throughout their lives. Teaching daughters to love themselves is a lifelong career for parents. On weekdays, parents must warn their daughters to cherish their bodies, learn to resist temptation, and stick to their own principles. A girl who knows how to love herself,Only then can you have more energy to love others and gain the love and respect of others. Practicing insensitivity Japanese writer Junichi Watanabe mentioned in the book \”Insensitivity\”: Insensitivity means the ability to not be too sensitive to surrounding affairs. It does not mean being slow, but emphasizes a kind of endurance in facing difficulties. , is a positive attitude towards life. Scientific research shows that girls\’ prefrontal lobes and occipital lobes develop faster and more fully than boys. They are more susceptible to external stimuli, can capture more information, and their minds are more delicate and sensitive than boys. If you want to cultivate a girl with dull powers, you cannot do without the patient guidance of your parents. When children are depressed, parents can guide their children to self-comfort, accept and release negative emotions; on weekdays, they can also cultivate a hobby for their children and enrich their daily activities, such as painting, reading, outdoor sports… Let the girl\’s inner world More colorful, no time to care about other people\’s eyes and comments. Finally, parents should lead by example, convey more positive energy to their children, and help girls get rid of their sensitivity and move forward with ease. Practice courage. Have you ever encountered such a situation: when you see someone you are not familiar with, your child hides behind you and doesn’t even dare to make eye contact; when you go to bed at night, your child is not allowed to turn off the light because he is afraid of the dark; in school, your child I don’t dare to raise my hand in class, and I’m even afraid to communicate with classmates. Many parents say \”my child is very timid\”, but they don\’t know that most children are timid and cowardly because of their parents. Especially for girls, parents subconsciously think that girls are fragile, so they habitually assume a \”protector\” posture and protect their children under their wings. Over time, a girl who is \”overprotected\” will become as timid as a mouse. As the saying goes: People\’s courage is cultivated. Parents must learn to let go, give girls the opportunity to keep trying and making mistakes, and give her a broader space for growth. You can encourage your children to have more contact with peers and visit relatives, friends, and neighbors, so that children can learn to deal with different people. Parents should also reduce negative hints to their children and change \”My child is timid\” to \”My child, try it.\” There is a very good passage in \”The Golden Years\”. I hope all girls will look like this in the future: \”If life gives me honey, I will enjoy it; if life gives me a test, I will wear armor and go into battle. I She can be a little princess who is inexperienced in the world, or she can be a unique hero.\” I hope our girls can have dreams in their hearts and a path at their feet, continue to practice, and grow into a shining girl. Click \”Like\” and encourage all parents.
You are Here
- Home
- Parenting knowledge
- Preschool period
- No matter how difficult it is, let your daughter practice these ten skills deliberately