Now the kids jump off the building when they disagree! What are you doing to save him?

A few days ago, a mother in the WeChat group said that her 5-year-old child is much shorter than his peers and often gets sick. Moreover, the child has a very weak personality and often cries at all times. She asked everyone if they can help. I learned some information from her. This child\’s life schedule has always been irregular. Sometimes my father comes back late from working overtime, and the family often goes to bed after 11 p.m. Because the son has to wait for his father to come back every day, then play together for a while, take a bath, and finally ask his father to tell a story, and it’s already 11 o’clock. At 5 years old, he is already a seasoned night owl. The irregular schedule makes the children sleep poorly at night, feel listless during the day, and often fall asleep in class all day long. I would often hide when participating in group activities in kindergarten, saying I was too tired. Long-term disordered work and rest will damage the child\’s body. Sleeping late has become a trend nowadays, but it is really not suitable for children. A child\’s schedule is actually controlled by a biological clock. Unfortunately, many children\’s biological clocks are often violently disrupted by their parents. I miss taking my son to my grandma’s house in the countryside very much. Night in the countryside seems to come earlier, and the world under the night is very quiet. So every time my son goes to bed at 8:30 and gets up at around 7 in the morning. A very healthy life routine. After coming to the city, my daily routine began to change. Especially for a period of time when the home is busy being renovated. We came back late, so our son kept waiting and didn\’t sleep until he saw us come back. As a result, sometimes I am still awake at 10 o\’clock. Couldn\’t get up again the next day. I don\’t think this is possible, so I have to find a way to get him to sleep early. Find a fixed spot to go to bed and get ready for bed. After a period of persistence, no matter how busy I am, I will still focus on this issue. Finally fixed this problem. And I have a habit of staying up late to write. Sometimes after coaxing him to sleep, I have to type on the keyboard for a few hours. So the next day my son got up, but I couldn’t get up myself. Sometimes he would come and wake me up. When I haven\’t woken up, I sometimes get angry when I wake up and get angry at the little guy. I regretted it afterwards. Many times, parents have no self-discipline themselves, but blame their children for procrastination or being unreasonable. It\’s a bit too much to blame your children for your own problems. In fact, in the eyes of children. My parents\’ procrastination is much worse than my own. It’s just that no one pointed it out. Another mother said that her son, who is in middle school, procrastinates on his homework. I was so busy playing after school that I forgot about my homework, and it was already very late when I wrote it. In the middle of the process, my mother looked at the parent group message and asked which students in the class had written it. When she read the names of the classmates, the child would interrupt and ask her to re-enter. The mother, who was already angry about her child\’s procrastination, couldn\’t figure out why her child had to re-name herself, so she persisted in explaining her reasoning for half an hour. In the end, I realized that I had mispronounced a classmate\’s name and apologized to the child. It turned out that it was already very late, and the child was dozing off while doing homework. The father spanked him, and the child finished his homework while crying. She said that the child had two problems, one was interrupting and crying, and the other was procrastinating on homework. Ask me what to do? To untie the bell, the person who tied it must start looking for the reason himself.After communication, she said that the adults in the family were not self-disciplined. For a family, parents are the roots and children are the flowers. If there is a problem with the flowers, there is probably a problem with the roots of the tree as well. The problems that parents often \”see\” in their children are often the \”flowering\” of their own problems in their children. Children are a mirror of their parents, reflecting their parents\’ problems. Let’s not talk about whether this child in middle school should do homework or not. But the school has arranged homework, so parents must let their children develop the rule of doing homework first and then playing when they go home. In this way, it can be completed within the specified time, and many subsequent conflicts can be avoided. If parents set reasonable schedules for their children. And try every means to ensure implementation and help children develop habits. This way you won\’t be too nervous and urge your child to hurry up. Many times, if parents do not have self-discipline, their children will of course become more casual. Parents themselves have difficulty controlling themselves, so don\’t expect a child to become self-aware. After becoming a parent, you must get your position right. Not only should I play a social role, but also be an inner psychological self, but I also need to play a good role in my family. Social roles have fixed careers, while the inner psychological self has desires, which are often out of control. But the family itself is a father and a mother. It is the role that requires the most caution and seriousness. Many mothers ask me, does Xiao Xiaoyu play with mobile phones? He plays it occasionally, but he is not addicted to it. He plays it for less than a few dozen minutes a week. I have several cell phones on the table and he won’t play with them. Because he knew those mobile phones were used by his father for work. Children have a strong sense of rules. Parents must not break them. Setting a bad example will ruin them. In the past, for the convenience of watching movies, I installed and uninstalled the player on my mobile phone. As a result, one time when I was watching, my son came over. His eyes were sparkling, and he was so excited that he asked me to show him cartoons. His curiosity must have been satisfied at the time. But then I uninstalled the player. Never use your mobile phone to watch TV in front of your children. Another time, I played a chess game. It was very exciting to play at the beginning, and the children also wanted to play. Even if they didn’t understand the rules, they still had to use it to click. Seeing that I like games so much, he asked me to play games for him. So I played a crocodile bathing game. And it is stipulated that three games should be played each time. He agreed, and after playing many levels, he stopped asking to play. And I also quit mobile games. So my mobile phone is my communication tool. Think about it, it\’s really a bit cruel to yourself. But as a father, I am willing to be cruel to myself. What does he like to do when he is not playing mobile games? It would climb up and down on me to play, and would pull me to play outside. Will play with his brother and sister. I will read, play some building block games, or play with a group of dinosaurs by myself. I would also paint, or spin around in circles if I was bored. Self-disciplined parents often raise better children. I always feel that there is a kind of fairness between heaven and earth. Especially when it comes to raising children, the parents’ intentions are often closely related to the outcome. Just like a farmer who cultivates the land, if he doesn\’t cultivate it properly and take care of it, his harvest will be very poor. There are two mothers like this in our village. A mother is our entertainment captain. Their house is like a running mat all year round, and there are always people playing cards. His son stopped studying after graduating from junior high school. When he was in school, he often played cards and gambled with a group of classmates at school. When there was no money, a group of people would ask for money from lower grade students. His father once got so angry that he locked him in the room and wanted to beat him. Ask him if he will play cards again in the future. In the end, he said something that left his father speechless: \”Okay, you can burn the mahjong machine in our house first. Do you dare? My mother has been playing cards for decades. Why don\’t you care? Why are you here to care about me today?\” .\” The father, who was originally afraid of his wife, was dumbfounded when his son said this, and could only stamp his feet and sigh. There is also a mother whose family conditions are average. But she is a very admirable woman. Every morning when we went to school, she would go out with her son. Sometimes I go to the fields carrying a hoe, and sometimes I carry a basket to pick tea. Always watching us go to school with a smile on his face. After school, she would quietly prepare the children\’s dinner at home. The two sons were doing their homework quietly under the light. I remember that their house was a wooden house at that time, and the walls were covered with newspapers. But the house was kept clean by this woman, and a wardrobe was transformed into a bookcase. We all like to go to their homes to borrow books and read. A few years later, both sons were admitted to key universities. In recent years, the old man has followed his son to big cities. Occasionally I come back and talk to the villagers about my interesting experiences. Everyone is envious, but those who really know her say she deserves it. Because she is a good mother. Self-disciplined parents can’t provide their children with good material conditions. But it can help children develop a regular life schedule and develop good living habits. And these are the best gifts for children!