Only when the mother is enlightened can the child become a dark horse

How to make children obedient? The answer is to change yourself first. Parents always want their children to be obedient, but they often forget that love is a two-way street and requires mutual respect and understanding between both parties. If you want your children to be leaders in life, you must first become a wise man who can lead your children. After becoming mothers, many people’s lives seem to be shrouded in anxiety: worries about their children falling behind from birth, worries about whether they can make a smooth transition to primary school, worries about the impact of not having a good school district housing on their children’s future, and worries about the impact of the lack of housing in a good school district on their children’s future. The children are healthy and safe, and later they are constantly asked to surpass others and become the best. Not only is this anxiety unhelpful, it can actually make your child feel uneasy. Parents repeatedly emphasize their concerns in their children\’s ears, hoping to motivate them, but they may inadvertently damage their children\’s self-esteem and longing for a better life. My cousin is one such anxious mother. Her son Tinker Bell, a fifth-grade student, is always disinterested in learning and his grades are always at the bottom of the class. Every time she saw her son being lazy, my cousin would get angry and scold him loudly. Her emotions are like flammable gunpowder that explodes at a moment\’s notice, making the family atmosphere tense. Long-term emotional depression even caused my cousin\’s thyroid problems. The doctor told her that this was the result of emotional depression. When my cousin looked in the mirror, she saw her haggard appearance and began to reflect on her own education methods. She recalled growing up under the strict discipline of her parents when she was a child. The pressure made her feel depressed and wanted to escape. When Tinker Bell came to her again with a test paper full of red crosses, her cousin did not get angry as before, but said to him gently: \”This time it is five points better than last time.\” The son was confused, and the cousin Then he said: \”Studying is your own business. Mom will not interfere too much in the future, but if you need help, you can tell me.\” From then on, my cousin was really only responsible for her son\’s daily life and no longer interfered too much with him. of learning. The family atmosphere became relaxed, and Tinker Bell also felt the changes in her mother. His mother no longer got angry with him because of his bad mood. He began to take the initiative to discuss with his mother the mistakes on the test paper, which ones were careless and which ones he did not understand. As time went by, Tinkerbell\’s performance also improved significantly. Educating children is not just about strict discipline, but more importantly, understanding and guidance. Children can only grow up healthily when they feel the love and support of their parents. In the parent-child relationship, if the mother no longer forces her children to change, but maintains inner peace, it will be easier for the children to find their own place, realize their own value, and naturally become better. At a parenting lecture, the lecturer asked a question: What do young people fear most about their parents? One audience member responded: This is for your own good. For your own good, his parents arranged various training courses for him and restricted his interests. Even in college, they used the same reason to let him choose a major that was close to home but he didn\’t like. He gradually became accustomed to his parents\’ \”good for you\” that he forgot that he also had his own ideas and choices. Parents\’ love should allow their children to fly freely, rather than restricting them with love. If motherIf love is too overwhelming, it may become a shackles for the child. Parental love can be expressed in many ways, but the most powerful love is to make children independent and strong. As Mr. Hu Shi said, parents raise children out of instinct, not gifts, so children do not need to be grateful. Parents should instead be grateful to their children, because their presence makes their parents\’ lives more colorful. Every child is unique. They have their own personality and potential. They are not copies of their parents, but independent existences with their own vitality and creativity. Parents\’ love for their children should conform to their children\’s nature, rather than imposing their own wishes; it should encourage them to fly higher and further, rather than tie them down just to satisfy their own needs.