Parents need sex education more than children

Two recent child molestation incidents have shocked the country. At Nanjing South Railway Station, a young man pulled a girl of about 10 years old to sit on his lap, put his hand under her skirt and touched her breasts. In a hospital in Chongqing, a middle-aged man pulled a little girl to sit on his lap, put his hand into her pants and groped her. And all of this was done in broad daylight and in full view of the public. Shocking and outrageous! The high incidence of obscene incidents has made some netizens sigh: China has become a \”big obscene country\”! \”Reference News\” reported on August 16 that courts at all levels across the country heard 10,782 child sexual abuse cases from 2013 to 2016, with an average of more than 7 cases heard every day, which means that at least more than 7 cases were heard every day. Children were harmed. This is still an iceberg family. Wang Dawei, a well-known criminal psychology expert and professor at the People\’s Public Security University of China, said that the ratio of sexual assault cases, especially those targeting primary and secondary school students, is 1:7. In other words, the exposure of a child sexual abuse news means that 7 cases have already occurred, and most child sexual abuse incidents have not been reported. It can be expected that the real data should be even more terrifying. What is even more surprising is that molesters are becoming more and more bold. When committing obscene acts, the occasions are becoming more and more public, and the targets are getting younger and younger – a 16-month-old baby girl was sexually assaulted, and the perpetrators were and The mother of the baby girl and the old man selling vegetables at the vegetable market. An old man who set up a stall on the roadside invited a few little girls to come over to play and give them hugs on the pretext of giving away candies and toys. In a community, a strange man followed a little boy into an elevator. When he saw no one was around, he suddenly kissed the boy and continued to make indecent moves towards him. ……audacious in the extreme! It’s scary to think about it! The media published articles reflecting on the situation and calling on parents to strengthen sex education for their children. Many parents don’t understand: “We didn’t receive any sex education when we were children, so why didn’t we come here like this?” “Do we need to be taught? When we grow up, we will understand everything!”… (Sex education in Zhongshan No. 1 Primary School During the course, the students had different expressions.) In the past, \”men and women were not allowed to touch each other\”, and it was taboo for couples to hold hands when they were in love. At my alma mater, there was a teacher couple. The man taught foreign languages ​​and the woman taught music. After a certain summer vacation, they were both labeled as rightists. One of the charges was that they often held hands on campus. Until the 1980s, when old men and women saw young lovers hugging each other on the street, they often scolded them for being \”immoral\”. In the early days of reform and opening up, falling in love and breaking up, or dancing in the street were considered hooliganism and were punishable by jail time. Even in this \”high-pressure\” social environment, many children are molested. It’s just that the media was underdeveloped at that time, there were fewer cameras and cameras, and people’s awareness of rights protection was weak, so many obscene cases were not made public. Nowadays, society is becoming more and more open, and sexual concepts are becoming more and more open. Many people are becoming more and more bold in sexual behavior. Things done behind closed doors are done with the door open, and things done in bed are done under the bed. When the moral environment becomes more tolerant, legal punishments become more lenient, and the risks and costs of obscenity and sexual assault become lower, the number of perverts becomes more and more, and they become more and more bold. supreme people\’s courtStatistics show that child molestation cases are increasing year by year. The Beijing Haidian Procuratorate revealed that the sexual assault cases of minors there ranked second among all types of cases. Data provided by judicial departments in Guangdong, Shandong, Hebei and other places also show this. Today\’s children face a much harsher gender environment than their parents\’ generation, and they need sex education more than ever before. A child without sex education is like a computer without anti-virus software. When there are more and more viruses (perversions) in the network environment (social environment), if you are not careful, you will be poisoned (violated). After the two molestation incidents at the beginning of the article broke out, many people found it difficult to understand: Why did the expressions of the two little girls not show any resistance or strangeness? Don’t they know they have been violated? Don’t you know you have been violated and need to call for help? Today, people\’s sexual concepts are open, but sex education has not kept up. Many children know nothing about sex. Many parents attach great importance to their children\’s education, but they downplay sex education and are ashamed to talk about it. Parents\’ bodies have entered the modern era, but their minds are stubbornly stuck in the past. The sex education their children have received is almost blank. It is difficult to expect parents who have not received sex education to provide qualified sex education to their children. Parents need sex education more than their children. Some parents believe that they value sex education and know how to teach their children to protect their privacy. But is it enough? The more complex the network environment, the higher the requirements for anti-virus software. By the same token, the more complex the social environment, the higher the requirements for sex education. Does your child take off his clothes in front of strangers? Someone did an experiment, and the parents confidently told the tester: \”I have taught my child not to take off her clothes in front of strangers at home, and she should not take off her clothes.\” In the end, four or five children were tested in front of them. The person took off his clothes because the tester told the child that \”there is candy to eat\” and \”there are new clothes to wear.\” Why take it off? Not enough sex education is done! Common misunderstandings that parents have about child sexual abuse include: Misunderstanding 1: Child sexual abuse is a minority after all. ——NO! More than 7 child sexual abuse cases are filed in China every day, and many people go unreported. Misunderstanding 2: Child sexual abuse should be guarded against strangers. ——NO! According to data from the Girls Protection Foundation, 70% of child sexual assaults are committed by acquaintances. Child sexual abuse is often committed by a family member who is trusted by a family member. This person may be a friend, neighbor, or even a relative. The younger the child, the more likely he or she is to be victimized by family members. Misunderstanding 3: Fortunately, we have a boy, so we don’t have to worry too much? ——NO! Xiang Ming, a professor at China Agricultural University, submitted a report to the World Health Organization: About 9.5% of girls are sexually assaulted, and 8% of boys are sexually assaulted; boys may be more severely sexually assaulted, and they are more likely to be sexually assaulted. Suffering severe physical trauma or even death due to sexual assault. Misunderstanding 4: Does child sexual abuse only cause direct harm? ——NO! In addition to direct physical harm to children, indirect child sexual abuse can also cause indelible damage to children\’s young minds. Indirect methods include the perpetrator exposing the child to sexual activities, pornographic images, and videos for self-gratification, as well as direct or suggestive language.Child molestation. There are too many bad people, what should parents do? The development of sex education in the United States is relatively mature. Here is a reminder from the American Child Development Association to parents. The first step is to identify what inappropriate physical contact is. Teach children how to distinguish between a normal hug and kiss (good touch) and inappropriate behavior (bad touch). The basis for the difference is the \”underwear rule\”: the body parts covered by underwear are private parts and cannot be shown to others at will, cannot be touched at will, and cannot be viewed or touched at will. The \”Underwear Principle\” is very vivid and easy to use. The second step is to repeatedly emphasize that once someone has malicious contact, parents must be informed in time. Be sure to let your children know that if something like this happens, their parents will be by their side to help them. It\’s definitely not their fault. Many people dare not tell their mothers what they have experienced until they become adults. When they were young, they did not dare to say it because they vaguely felt that it was not a good thing and were afraid of being blamed by their mothers. Therefore, it is very important to dispel this concern of children. The third step is to never leave the child alone with any man, and do not allow the child to get along with men in a closed space. It’s not that you don’t trust people, but that certain evils in human nature are difficult to eradicate, so don’t create a catalytic hotbed. As a mother, you should always be on guard. To what extent does this kind of sexual assault prevention education pass? Li Xiaopeng\’s daughter Ollie in \”Daddy Is Back\” showed a strong sense of self-protection in the show because she received sex education from her mother since she was a child. In one episode, Li Xiaolu\’s daughter Tianxin had to change her pants, and Oli was there to cover her up and stop her from watching. This shows that Ollie has learned self-protection and knows what self-privacy is. We can\’t cure the evil in the world, and we can\’t stay with our children all the time, so we should provide adequate sex education and install \”anti-virus software\” for her. The world is a dangerous place, and children must not be allowed to run around \”naked\”.