Parents should be as smart as Yang Lan

As parents, why shouldn’t we be grateful to our children? Children remind us of the beauty of life and the power of love with their existence. During the most difficult time in my life, when I think of them, I feel so at ease and become more powerful. Parents have talked about respecting their children many times, but very few have done it. They keep saying it is for the good of their children, but they don’t know the significance of respect for a child’s growth. When the daughter of the famous host Yang Lan was twelve years old, Yang Lan felt that a little girl would like a gift such as a pink doll. Unexpectedly, her daughter seriously rejected it and issued a \”Declaration of Independence\” to herself: Mom, Please don’t buy me any pink clothes or those shiny decorations in the future. I’ve grown up. If ordinary parents encounter this kind of thing, they will definitely not take it seriously and think it is not a big deal, but for Yang Lan, who is also a mother, it is her own negligence and not considering her daughter\’s thoughts. From then on, Yang Lan also respected her daughter\’s \”Declaration of Independence\” and did not give her daughter any pink gifts that she thought were disrespectful to her. How do you respect your children? “If you want to respect your children, you must understand them, their interests, hobbies, and even their true thoughts, as well as their strengths, weaknesses, and personality traits. Only by truly understanding your children can you educate your children.” Be timely and moderate, not only measured, but also acceptable to the children. After Yang Lan\’s son entered fifth grade, he confided to Yang Lan that he didn\’t want her to attend parent-teacher meetings for him anymore, because many classmates would say \”Oh\” when they saw his mother. , this is Yang Lan’s son. \”But for him, he is not willing to receive attention because of his parents. After Yang Lan found out, every time he went to school to give a speech as an educational celebrity, he would discuss the content of the speech with his son in advance and never say anything that would embarrass his son. \”I think this is his independence, which is particularly worthy of respect. \”Yang Lan\’s respect for children is also reflected in all the little things in daily life. When entering their room, he knocks on the door first, and does not turn over their belongings or check their mobile phones without their permission; he takes them to attend parent-teacher meetings with him, Ask them in advance what they think of the teacher, and don’t say anything wrong with the child in front of the teacher, but only discuss how they can do better… “I think this kind of respect makes children more self-disciplined, and also develops the habit of respecting other people’s privacy. . \”Compared with Yang Lan\’s education method, many parents prefer and tend to the authoritarian mode. This is not good and cannot be done; that is dangerous and is not allowed to be done; you are still young and ignorant and must listen to me… Many children are like this Under the education method, they become more and more silent and introverted. They don’t have their own opinions when going out, and they dare not express their thoughts and requests when there are many people. In Sweden, respecting children is a particularly sacred thing. They treat children Children\’s respect is reflected in the specific details of life. For example, when Swedish parents talk to their children, they will all squat down and \”keep the same height\” as possible with their children. Such actions are intended to tell the children: We are Equally. Even if you are blaming your child for something wrong, pay attention to your tone. \”If youMy mother and I would be very happy to be able to do that.\” \”We are very happy that you can do this! . \”When children make mistakes, they never yell at them in front of everyone, calling them idiots, etc., because such disrespect will hurt the child\’s \”face\” and make the child have low self-esteem. At Planton School in Stockholm, the capital of Sweden On the campus is engraved a famous saying by John Locke, a famous British philosopher, thinker, and educator in the 18th century: \”The less parents publicize their children\’s faults, the more their children will value their own reputation, and therefore they will be more careful to protect others\’ reputation. own praise. If parents announce their faults in public, making them feel ashamed, the more they feel that their reputation has been damaged, the less they will be willing to protect their reputation. \”Respect children regardless of their age or the size of the matter. Their ideas should be respected; their opinions should be respected; their mistakes should also be respected. Children\’s lives have their own dues He should have a complete experience of the trajectory, what should be endured, and what should be experienced. Disappointment, mistakes, failures, pain, sadness, and scars all have their own value. There is no need to artificially create a false living space, because life is In fact, life must go through hardships to become real. Bi Shumin said. Your children are not actually your children. They are children born of life’s desire for itself. They came to this world with the help of you, but they did not come because of you. , they are by your side, but they do not belong to you. What you can give them is your love, but not your thoughts, because they have their own thoughts. – Gibran \”To the Children We Will Eventually Stay Away from\”