Parents who often beat and scold their children have serious consequences

I often hear many parents say: We don’t spank our children, we all respect our children. We know that children cannot be hit, and we usually talk to them carefully. If you really don\’t listen, you\’ll just curse a few times. Although many parents do not spank their children. However, if you educate your children in the wrong way. It may be better to spank a child than to scold him. In fact, many parents don\’t know that scolding their children can cause more serious harm to them than hitting them. What\’s the meaning? Even if you scold the child, blaming the child will cause more harm than hitting the child directly. Therefore, parents must be aware of four major harms caused by scolding children frequently. The first hazard: Do you know that parents who often scold their children cause their children to have lower self-esteem? Your behavior will make your child feel inferior. Many parents often say: My child has no self-discipline at all and a weak sense of rules. I have set many rules for him but he just can\’t do it. For any parent who is so confused, you must have not found the essence of educating your children. In fact, it’s not that children don’t follow the rules, nor does it mean that children can’t follow the rules. On the surface, we think it is because children have poor self-discipline. However, parents have to think about a question. What is the root cause of children\’s poor self-discipline? Nothing can be solved without finding the root cause. In fact, the root cause of a child\’s lack of self-discipline is often because he has low self-esteem. Why is his self-esteem low? Because he is not confident. Must-read parenting books for parents recommend downloading psychological adjustment in children’s families. Why isn’t he confident? Because his parents didn\’t believe him, and others didn\’t believe him either. Many parents will only set a lot of rules to ask their children, and never look at themselves. If their children fail to do so, they will only blame their children. Of course, this just means that there is something wrong with your understanding of educating children. So, what would parents with correct understanding do when faced with their children’s problems? They will focus on cultivating trust in their children and cultivating their sense of trust. The more parents believe in their children, and the more parents trust their children, the stronger their children\’s self-esteem will be. A person with enough self-esteem can be a person who can be self-disciplined. Therefore, parents’ focus should not be mistaken. By destroying a child\’s self-esteem, you will only create a child with an inferiority complex. I would like to ask a child with low self-esteem and no energy inside, how can he do what you want? For example: everything is positive and makes you satisfied. Study hard every day, eat well, sleep well, and coordinate everything in place. Obviously, this is impossible. Therefore, when parents scold their children when they are distracted while doing homework, when they lose their temper, when they are disobedient, or when they cry, they are all destroying the child\’s self-esteem. So, parents, take note, you can deny your child’s behavior. However, please remember one key point: never deny your child as a person. When you deny him as a person, he will easily feel inferior and become sensitive and vulnerable. He will feel unhappy and feel uncomfortable in his heart. Over time, children will be ruined in the hands of their parents. The second hazard: Children will feel insecure. If parents often yell and reprimand their children, children will feel insecure. His interpersonal communication will be out of controlFound a big problem. For example: a child will feel unsafe and afraid when he sees everything around him. He didn\’t even dare to communicate normally with others for fear of being bullied by others, and he didn\’t dare to express his thoughts. Please think about it carefully? How do you usually treat your children at home? Parents can connect their children\’s behavior with the situation at that time and think about the connection between them. Therefore, why should parents manage their emotions well? Because parents’ emotions directly affect their children’s emotions. A child\’s inner happiness and sense of security are all related to and influenced by their parents. The third harm: worsening the relationship between you and your children. If a parent destroys the trust between you and your children, it is equivalent to deteriorating the parent-child relationship between you and your children. Parents can self-assess how much trust there is between you and your children? How many misunderstandings do you have with your children? A mother once told me: My son and his father are simply enemies. Parents, please think about it. When children first come into this world, are they enemies with their parents? Certainly not. So, after you have raised your child for a few years, you have become an enemy in more than ten years. Should you examine yourself and see what is happening here? Have you raised your children to be enemies? Then there must be something wrong with your parent-child relationship. The child you gave birth to is raised by you for several years, more than ten years. As a result, he still hates you, just like you become an enemy. Think about it for yourself, who can you blame for this matter? Therefore, parents themselves must wake up first. After all, you are an adult. No matter how excessive or ignorant a child is, he is still a child. The fourth hazard: seriously affecting children\’s attention. When parents often yell at their children and often scold them. Do you know what could go wrong? It can cause serious loss of attention and memory in children. At this time, the fear in the child\’s heart will increase and he will become habitually afraid. As a result, the child\’s learning will definitely regress. In fact, after parents scold their children loudly, do you notice? In fact, the children\’s academic performance and behavioral habits have not changed as a result. So, when your child does not study well and has various problems. Parents should first think about how to change themselves first? Is there something wrong with your family atmosphere and your education methods? Don\’t put your focus on your child\’s behavior. Behavior is just the result. We need to find out the cause of this result. The cause is the source of the behavior. As long as the source of the problem is solved, behavioral problems can basically be solved.