Parents who support their children are worth all the great education

1. Can you support your children? The old education method of \”good people come out of the stick\” is no longer suitable for educating today\’s children. I particularly agree with one sentence: Outstanding children are the result of their parents’ support. To lift up is to support, to lift up is to encourage, to lift up is to affirm and appreciate the child, which is an educational philosophy that is diametrically opposed to \”stick education\”. I came across a video some time ago, in which a 14-year-old girl carefully prepared four dishes and one soup for her mother. When her mother came back, she was not only ungrateful, but also scolded her daughter while filming the video: \”Am I going to praise you? You gave me lunch at noon.\” How can we finish eating so many dishes?\” Her mother\’s tone was full of disgust and blame. Instead of praising her for being capable and sensible, and not encouraging her cooking skills, she blamed her for waste and posted the video online. After watching the video, I had mixed feelings in my heart. I felt sorry for this sensible little girl. At the same time, I felt emotional: How lucky I am to have a mother who knows how to support her children. She supports and affirms her children when they accomplish something. Giving appreciation and trust to children when they are down in life can become a huge spiritual force for them to overcome difficulties. However, in reality, there are very few parents who will support their children, and more parents will only disappoint and cause trouble. For example, there is this mother: A little girl played a song specially for her mother on her mother\’s birthday. After listening to it, her mother not only did not express surprise or happiness, nor thank her daughter, but she said to her daughter: \”This song is great.\” You\’ve been practicing for two weeks, why are you still not proficient? Have you practiced seriously? \”How would you feel if you were this little girl? I remember teacher Zeng Qifeng gave an example in class: a little boy and his father were watching airplanes outside the airport fence. The little boy was riding on his father\’s shoulders. He felt so awesome that he couldn\’t help but imitate the movie line loudly: I am the king of the world! As soon as he finished speaking, the plane landed from overhead. The huge roar frightened the little boy. The father looked at his son and said, \”Didn\’t you just say that you are the king of the world? A plane can scare you to the point of trembling. You are not the world.\” King!\” These are parents who don\’t know how to support their children. They always only see their children\’s shortcomings and shortcomings, and they always look at their children with a critical eye. If you don\’t understand the child\’s feelings, you can\’t get into the child\’s heart, and you can\’t satisfy the child\’s inner emotional needs. There is a passage in the book \”Human Weaknesses\”: People are born to like to be encouraged. Using this kind of education method, children can grow up in a relaxed and happy atmosphere, gain confidence, and become better. Parents who don\’t support their children are a pain in their children\’s lives. If children always feel that they are not good enough, they may develop low self-esteem. This feeling of inferiority will accompany the child throughout his life, and he will need to please others in order to gain the recognition he desperately lacks in his heart. Part 2 2. How to support children Yan Yuan, an educator in the Qing Dynasty, once said, \”It is better to reward one child for one child than to count ten children.\” To lift up means to affirm, appreciate, praise and recognize. The most important point about how to lift up a child is that parents should have an appreciative eye, discover the child\’s strengths, and encourage the child more. You can refer to the following methods: 1. Amplify the light and reduce the darkness. Light refers to the child\’s strengths and progress, and darkness refers to the shortcomings and deficiencies., in other words, look more at the children’s strengths and not look at or look at less than the shortcomings. There is a saying that “only look at the advantages and the advantages will become more and more, and do not look at the shortcomings and the shortcomings will gradually decrease.” It is indeed true. It is very simple to say, It’s hard to do. What’s so hard about it? The difficulty lies in changing habits – the habit of only looking at mistakes and not progress. I remember once I organized an offline discussion and exchange event for some parents. At the beginning of the event, I asked the parents to take turns talking about the shortcomings of their children, and every parent kept talking. Then I ask parents to talk about their children\’s strengths, and many parents scratch their heads and think for a long time but can only come up with one or two. This shows that parents are used to picking on their children\’s shortcomings. And it is to use a magnifying glass to find faults, and to lift is to use a magnifying glass to find advantages. Regarding lifting, I agree very much with the approach of Teacher Liu from our community calligraphy class. The picture below is the homework for my children to practice calligraphy. The small red circles above indicate areas where the writing is good or there is progress. The teacher only looks at correctness and progress. Carefully Look for well-written characters. If none of the characters are well-written, look for well-written radicals. If there are no good radicals, look for strokes. If not, look for well-written small hooks and dots. If not, look for comparison with yesterday. Those who have made progress will find a lot of them and reward the children, so the children like to go to class there. 2. Focus on the process rather than the result. Life is a process, not a result. Calm down, feel and enjoy every moment, and you will find that life is very different. Any parent who cares about right or wrong regardless of their feelings is impatient, impatient, and too purposeful. The most important thing in educating children is patience! Pay attention to the process of the child doing homework, rather than urging the child to finish writing quickly. Pay attention to the process of the child eating, and let the child enjoy eating, rather than urging the child to finish the meal quickly. Educate children to be slow. Only by slowness can you enter the feelings and enter the child\’s heart. Only slowly can you feel the changes in your child\’s growth. If you often rush your child, I suggest you always tell your child from now on: Don’t rush, take your time, I’m here! 3. Make an encouragement wall for your children. Hang the various certificates and awards the children have received from childhood to adulthood on the wall, so that the children can see their growth process. Take pictures of the children\’s growth, such as participating in a competition. Even if it\’s not important, even if they don\’t get a ranking, if the child actively participated, isn\’t it worth being seen? Let the children witness their own progress towards excellence. Conclusion: Excellent children are the result of the support of their parents. Every child needs the support of his parents. Parents who can support their children are the blessings of their children\’s lives. Finally, I would like to share a paragraph: The meaning of parents’ existence is not to give their children a comfortable and prosperous life. But when you think of your parents, your heart will be full of strength, you will feel warmth, and you will have the courage and ability to overcome difficulties to gain the joy and freedom of life.