People’s Daily recommends: The most advanced family education is when parents do these 9 things

The philosopher Plato once said: \”Where a person\’s education from childhood guides him will determine where he will go later.\” People are like this. What kind of family they grow up in when they are young will determine what kind of path they will take when they grow up. road. What causes parents plant in the soil of education in the first half of their lives will bear fruit on their children in the second half of their lives. Family is a child\’s first school, and parents are their child\’s first teachers. The growth of every big tree depends on the nutrition of sunlight and water; behind every outstanding child is the hard work of his parents. These 9 views on family education recommended by the People\’s Daily are worth reading and re-reading by all parents. Parents are the first persons responsible for family education. In \”The First Lesson of School\”, Dong Qing said something that impressed me deeply: \”When educating children, you choose to make money instead of disciplining the children. When the children grow up, The money you have worked so hard for all your life is not worth the money he has spent in one year. \”Parents often think that as long as their children have \”no worries about food and clothing,\” and there are teachers in school to teach them, it doesn\’t matter if they indulge in education. As everyone knows, the consequences of the lack of family education will need to be slowly made up for in the next few decades. In the British documentary \”Seven Years in the Life\”, the director spent more than 60 years following 14 children, from childhood to old age, recording their growth trajectory every seven years. Through records, we found that those children who lacked parental care and did not receive a good education grew up to disbelieve in the world, lose their dreams, and live in confusion; while those children who grew up with their parents grew up in a good environment. Growing up in a family education, people generally have lofty ideals and extraordinary insights as adults, and ultimately live a happy life. There is a saying that is right: Educating your children well is the most important thing for parents. People who have been \”hands-off managers\” when it comes to children\’s education are still trying their best to fill the holes left over the years. Parents who are absent from their children\’s growth often end up paying an irreparable price. Dear parents, please don’t let go of your children when it’s time to take care of them. The most critical stage of a child’s growth is only a few years. Once you miss it, there is no chance to come back again. Don\’t let a moment\’s carelessness turn into a lifelong regret. Rejecting any form of domestic violence Harvard University conducted a study and the results showed that the average IQ of children who were often spanked was 20% lower than the average IQ of children who were not spanked. And these are one of the huge harms that domestic violence brings to children. I heard a friend tell her personal experience before: As long as she can remember, she has lived in the shadow of domestic violence. At first, all she saw was her parents quarreling fiercely. Later, whenever they disagreed, her father would beat her mother. Until one year, my father suddenly lost his job and lost his source of income. He drank to relieve his sorrow every day and didn\’t come home until he was very drunk. Whenever he was drunk, his father would punch and kick the mother and daughter, sometimes even until their heads were bleeding, and he had no intention of stopping. After going to college, she deliberately chose a far away city, thinking that everything would slowly get better and the pain would eventually be forgotten. But a cup accidentally overturned, a beer bottle dropped on the ground, etc., all sudden noises will trigger thatA \”painful nerve\” made her break out in a cold sweat. The shadow of her childhood has been with her to this day. For a long time, she did not dare to approach the opposite sex, was afraid of marriage, and was afraid of contact with others. I have seen too many people whose lives have been ruined by domestic violence. In addition to the physical pain, the scars on the soul are even more difficult to erase. In addition to the violent tendencies in behavior, there are also heart-breaking words in words. Each and every incident is enough to completely defeat a person. No matter what form of violence, it casts a haze on a child\’s life. Always remember that the bottom line of family education is to start by rejecting violence. Respect and protect children’s human dignity. After studying thousands of criminal cases, psychologist Li Meijin came to a conclusion: “Children’s problems are often caused by adults. Every psychological or behavioral problem of children is related to their parents. It is related to the behavior and the education methods of parents.\” I deeply believe that. A child\’s outlook on life is formed under the step-by-step guidance of his parents. In the Taiwanese drama \”Jasmine\’s Last Day\”, the ending of 16-year-old Jasmine is heartbreaking. Looking closely, the tragedy actually has traces. When Jasmine got first place in the exam, her mother would only tell her: \”Don\’t be too proud. If I hadn\’t been watching, you would have thought you could have been first.\” If she made a small mistake, her mother would be furious: \”What if? If I hadn\’t given birth to you, I would still be a professor…\” When she had conflicts with her classmates, her mother would just keep scolding her: \”Cry? Are you still embarrassed to cry?\” Straws fell on Jasmine, which over time crushed her. Hope also destroyed her life. In despair, she chose to commit suicide by jumping off the building. Maybe many parents don\’t understand that it\’s just a small thing or a criticism, why is it so serious? You know, a child\’s world is small, and parents occupy a large part of it. Parents\’ suppression and denial will only slowly cause the child\’s world to collapse. When a child makes a mistake, don\’t just blame him, teach him to understand the root of the problem. When educating your children, don’t always settle old scores, let alone undermine your children’s self-confidence. Real education should be as comfortable as the gentle breeze and drizzle, rather than as damaging as the violent storm. Give children the right to choose. The poet Gibran has a thought-provoking poem: \”Your children are actually not your children. They are children born of life\’s desire for itself. They came to this world with the help of you, but they did not come because of you.\” They are by your side, but they do not belong to you. What you can give them is your love, not your thoughts, because they have their own thoughts. What you can protect is their bodies, not their souls. Their souls belong to tomorrow. \”As a parent, you must understand that your children are independent individuals first, and then your children. When they are young, although they do not yet have a complete understanding of the world, they have the right to choose, and their parents only need to guide them correctly. As adults, children will gradually develop the ability to distinguish right from wrong and develop their own interests and hobbies. Parents should give them the right to choose their lives. Stop interfering in your children\’s lives under the guise of \”for your own good\”. There is no need to arrange everything for your children and disrupt their life rhythm. Respect children’s choicesMaking choices and accompanying him through every stage of life is the truly best way to treat your child. Psychological support is more important than material support. Some people say that no matter how busy you are on the road to education, you must take time to accompany your children as they grow. Because no matter how much money you make, it can\’t make up for the missing part of your child\’s soul. Material things bring affluence in life, but the lack of companionship and communication education will cause ideological and spiritual deficiencies in children. When \”Only Thirty\” was on the air, some netizens said that they were not envious of Gu Jia\’s mansion, but they were envious of the small happiness of a family of three selling breakfast. Their conditions do not seem to be well-off. The husband is busy delivering express delivery every day, and the wife wakes up early and stays up late selling scallion pancakes. However, the family\’s faces are always filled with happiness. \”When the lights are dimming, on the way home, the husband\’s heart is quiet, the wife\’s face is happy, and the child\’s hands are holding the light. This is the most authentic look of life.\” The so-called wisest way to raise children is not Material improvement, but giving the child enough sense of security to enrich his heart. Instead of giving your child expensive gifts, it is better to sit down quietly and listen to his inner world in your free time. Parents must understand that high-quality companionship is better than countless wealth, and high-quality protection is better than all material things. Character determines a child\’s fate. Mo Yan told a story at the Nobel Prize for Literature ceremony: When he was a child, people in the village often laughed at him because he was ugly. There were some domineering classmates in the school who even beat him for this. Because he was often bullied, he cried loudly when he went home. After his mother learned what had happened, she told him: \”Son, you are not ugly. You have neither a nose nor an eye. Your limbs are sound. Where is the ugliness? And as long as you are kind-hearted, Do good deeds, and even if you are ugly, you can become beautiful.\” Many years later, when Mo Yan went to the city, people still laughed at him. Whenever he did this, he could remember his mother\’s words, so he could deal with it calmly. Never feared gossip. The guidance of parents affects the character of children; the education of parents determines the destiny of children. Every child is born with a blank slate, and the development of their character and outlook largely depends on their parents. If you write positivity and optimism on it, you will get an optimistic child; if you write kindness and kindness on it, you will get a kind and selfless child; if you write violence and arrogance on it, you will get a cruel and evil child. . In a family, teaching children how to behave is more important than excellent grades. Be good at discovering children\’s strengths. In psychology, there is a famous effect called the \”Rosenthal effect.\” The general idea is that ten students are selected from a group of students and then told that they are the most promising ones in the school. A few months later, when I returned to the school for investigation, I found that not only had the scores of these ten students improved greatly, but they had also become more confident and optimistic. It can be seen that being good at discovering the child\’s strengths and praising him will greatly help the child\’s growth. Frequently saying these three sentences to your children is also the key to family education: 1. In my heart, you will always be the best. 2. Regardless of success or failure, as long as you work hard, you will be the best. 3. CauseI\’m so proud of you. Teach by words and deeds, educate children as well as yourself. Educator Homlinsky said: Every moment you see your children, you see yourself; when you educate your children, you educate yourself and test yourself. If we are right as parents, our children will be right. The process of educating children is also the process of parents\’ growth. If parents do their best, their children will naturally make no mistakes. Not long ago, the education methods of a father in Hubei sparked heated discussions across the Internet. The 11-year-old daughter was in the rebellious stage and did not want to study, so her father took her to dig lotus roots in the river during the scorching sun. The father said that he wanted his daughter to experience daily labor so that she could understand that if she doesn’t suffer the hardships of studying, she will have to suffer the hardships of life. After 4 hours of work, the skin on the child\’s face was peeled from the sun, and his father stayed with him every step of the way. Although he felt distressed, he wanted his child to realize the importance of reading. Finally, the girl changed her original idea and chose to go back to school to study hard. Teaching by words and deeds is the most effective way of education. Only by leading by example can children learn more quickly how to navigate life. The difficulty of education lies in the method; the root of education lies in the parents. Don\’t let your children realize your dreams for you. Everyone\’s life is unique, and children are not their parents\’ personal belongings. Parents should just be a beacon of light in their children\’s lives, and leave the rest to their children. As Liu Yu said in a letter to her daughter: \”If you want to be a Wall Street banker, just go for it, but if you just want to be a baker, that\’s fine. If you want to be in politics, your mother will do the same.\” Support. \”One day the child will grow up, and the best love you can give him is to let him live the way he likes. Don\’t let your children become a tool to realize your dreams, and don\’t interfere in your children\’s lives at will. Only by caring carefully when it\’s time to care and letting go when it\’s time to let go can your child\’s happy life be achieved. I agree with a point of view: \”Education is a practice that helps others and oneself. It is like a tree shaking a tree, a cloud pushing a cloud, and a soul awakening a soul.\” While the children are still young, master this 9 views on family education, try your best to fulfill your responsibilities as parents. If you don’t be lazy on the road to education, you will have fewer regrets. Educating your children well is the best investment you can make in the rest of your life. I hope you can discover deficiencies, find problems, correct yourself, be a good parent and have a good child in these 9 views on family education.