Please respect your child’s friction, it’s a secret that most parents don’t know

A few days ago, a mother got \”hot\” early in the morning. This is how it was posted in the circle of friends: \”I slept in and woke up for dozens of minutes in the morning. I couldn\’t finish eating for half an hour and kept dragging my feet! I told him that he could play after eating, but he didn\’t listen at all! I was distressed and painful! Angry! But I can\’t help but seem to have gotten him used to this! After beating him, he returned to his original state for a while, what should I do?\” What\’s the secret behind the child\’s dawdling? During the May Day holiday, I didn’t go out to play, so I took my son for a walk in a nearby park every day. Once I passed by a stall that fished for small fish. Many parks have this project. There was a group of small goldfish in a small, square pool made of iron. The children took the small fishing nets and fished for small fish in it. It is very suitable for babies aged two or three to exercise the flexibility of their little hands. And those children who like fish can\’t put it down. I saw several children sitting by the small pool. But there was a little boy dressed in black who caught everyone\’s attention. Because his mother kept grabbing his little hand and gesticulating on the pool without stopping: \”This way, that way, hurry up, you are so stupid, hurry up, everything is slow.\” The child looked very uncomfortable, but the mother standing behind him didn\’t notice that a lot of fish had been caught in the small basin next to them. But it’s all thanks to my mother. I really want to say: Why don’t you let go? How many parents urge their children to be faster and to be more independent. On the other hand, he held the child\’s hand tightly and wouldn\’t let go. Children can slowly follow a small fish with a small net and keep following it, or they can carefully pick it up, or even let go of the frightened fish, which is quite fun. But in the eyes of parents, this is not the case. When fishing, you must catch a basin. Catching three or four fish in one net is considered great. My son used to fish a lot, but I usually paid him no attention. Watch him quietly, and every time he fishes quietly at his own pace. He was clumsy at first, but later he was able to catch several fish at a time. When he came to show off his trophies to me, I gave him a big thumbs up. When there are many fish in his basin, remind him to put the fish back into the pond, otherwise there will be no fish for everyone to catch. Children are always happy to put the little fish back. Many times, we blame children for their poor hands-on ability and their procrastination. Have you ever thought about whether it is caused by your own fear of letting go? It\’s not so much \”habitual\” as it is harmful. Many times, in the eyes of some outsiders, I am not my son’s biological father. I remember one time I took him to eat at the steamed vegetable restaurant downstairs at noon because the rice was a bit dry. He is not happy to eat it by himself. But I didn\’t say anything and gave him a little more soup. The son used this as an excuse to eat his rice slowly without taking a bite. I know what he is thinking, he wants me to feed him. Many times, parents are afraid that their children will be hungry, so they will definitely feed them. Children also often capture their parents\’ thoughts. But I ignored it and waited for him to eat after eating. He changed his tricks and played with the stool again, and accidentally fell to the ground. At this time he burst into tears. \”At this time, you should make it up to me and feed me.\” I knew what he was thinking when he looked at me with those pitiful eyes. But I just took a look and he hadHe was not hurt, and then he said it was okay and continued eating. At this time, an older lady at the next table couldn\’t stand it anymore. I think I\’m too \”cruel\”. But the son, who felt that there was nothing he could do, had to eat it one bite at a time. It didn\’t take long for me to finish my meal. Why do you rush to cater to your child and break the rules when you see him crying? Many times, children don’t need your help, but your gentle persistence. Because when they see their parents\’ attitude, they will adjust their behavior. Many times, the dilly-dallying is just a way to get parents to take care of things. Of course, some dawdling has other reasons and needs to be respected by parents. I used to think that the child\’s dilly-dallying was intentional. But one day my son said to me: \”Dad, don\’t rush me, because my butt is a little fat and my pants are too small. I have to put on my pants more slowly. Can you give me a little more time?\” \”Okay, I\’ll wait for you.\” One day he said to me again, \”Dad, don\’t rush me, because I am so slow.\” Indeed, his little fingers were not flexible enough. You see, he was struggling because the zipper was difficult to insert. Sometimes, he is in a daze over the left and right sides of his shoes. But fearing that the parents would lose their temper or to prove themselves, the child kept holding on until his little face turned red. Without knowing what\’s going on, we just count the time and rush, and if we don\’t hurry up, we lose our temper. And many times, parents\’ urging often comes from inner anxiety. A dilly-dallying child can make parents uncomfortable and even frightened. Because if you are slow, it will be too late. If you are behind, it will be too late. This is a worry that many parents have. So many mothers tell me that their children are one year old and don’t have many teeth. Is there something wrong? My child is 1 and a half years old and still only calls me mommy but cannot say anything else. Is there something wrong? My child is in middle school and still can’t write his name. Is he falling behind? My child is in the second grade of elementary school. Should I enroll him in an after-school enrichment class? Most of the students in the class have signed up. Anxious parents are a common problem in education today. Many people criticize exam-oriented education, but at the same time they continue to provide more training for their children, making up lessons in one class after another. When parents are unable to overcome these anxieties and pass them on to their children, harm occurs unknowingly. Many interest classes are not of interest to children, and many improvement classes allow children to improve their scores without asking about other abilities. Every child has his own development pattern. Parents should respect the laws of their children\’s growth. Slow down and take your time. Even if you choose specialty training for your children, you must make an objective and rational choice instead of blindly following the trend. When there is respect from parents, many changes will happen. Nothing is more effective than letting children try out the experience they gain on their own. Children often don\’t have a deep impression of what parents say and teach their children how to do it. But the children will always remember the things they do and the experiences they gain. Four simple steps to deal with your child’s troubles. When your child tries to do it, let it go. This is an attitude that parents should have, learn to let go. When your child needs independence, don\’t hold him tightly. When your child is doing it, please watch, don’t replace it. Help your children complete it, it will definitely workWinning temporary convenience may not necessarily be a good thing in the long run by raising a child who has no independent opinions and relies on his parents for everything. Provide help when the child needs it, or set an example for the child. Letting go does not mean letting go, nor does it mean leaving things alone. Parents find their true selves as they grow up, and they also help their children pursue their ideals. When you need to establish a sense of rules, please don\’t say let go. When your child achieves success, encourage him or her. Confident children are more able to try bravely, allow children to make mistakes, and actively encourage children. When a child\’s positive behavior becomes a habit. They will run consciously on their own track. Just like every planet has its own orbit, you cannot use external forces to interfere roughly with it. Most of children\’s dilly-dallying is related to their parents\’ guidance. When facing your children, ask yourself, are you too anxious? Is the child really ready? The more parents reflect, the more peaceful they will be.