We often say that we really don’t know what our children are thinking. In fact, a person\’s character and inner thoughts will be expressed through his behavior. For example, regarding low self-esteem, to see whether a child is truly strong and confident in his heart, or whether he is timid and has low self-esteem, we only need to look at his daily performance. Psychology has found that if a child does not like to do 4 things, it means that he has low self-esteem deep down. Let’s take a look at what are the symptoms of children with low self-esteem. 01 Don’t dare to lose your temper. I have observed many children and found that those children who are independent and thoughtful will protest loudly and express their dissatisfaction after being treated unfairly. But for most children with timid personalities, even if they are bullied, they will just suppress their blushes and look at you with an aggrieved look. Once I was playing with a group of children. I saw a little girl who was very cute, so I couldn\’t help but pinch her face. Unexpectedly, she said to me very seriously: \”I don\’t like you touching my face.\” I was very embarrassed to apologize to her at that time. A Complete Collection of Parenting Communication Skills Allows \”Stupid\” Children to Go to Prestigious Schools Electronic Edition Download On the contrary, one of the boys was particularly naughty and always kept pulling on another girl\’s pigtails. But the girl just whispered back \”Don\’t bullshit\” and didn\’t make any reply. When the boy saw that this girl was easy to bully, he kept teasing her. Confident children can quickly capture their own emotions and win the respect of others with their actions. Children with timid personalities, even if they are dissatisfied, do not dare to let themselves lose their temper. This is because confident children confirm that they can express themselves at will. Children with low self-esteem feel that losing their temper is unsafe and may hurt others or themselves. The reason why children have such different reactions has a lot to do with their parents\’ attitudes. When a child loses his temper, if we are patient and tolerant enough, we will allow him to vent his negative emotions. After venting, we will tell him the facts and reason. Children will feel that they can express whatever they feel. Then he will be more confident when getting along with others, and he will know more about self-respect and self-love. But many times, when a child cries, we lose control of our emotions first. Either yell at the child, or scold him directly: \”Stop crying, don\’t cry!\” From our reaction, the child understands a truth: crying is not good, and losing temper is not allowed. He will suppress these emotions and would rather feel wronged than dare to express his dissatisfaction. Slowly, the child will become inferior and timid. Even if he is treated unfairly, he will not dare to lose his temper. 02 Children who are afraid to try new things and have low self-esteem will be too concerned about other people\’s opinions, especially afraid of what others will say about them after failure. Because of this, most children with low self-esteem don\’t like to try new things and therefore miss out on many wonderful things. Once I heard a conversation between a mother and her son. The child told his mother that the school was going to hold a school sports meeting, and many students in the class had signed up to participate in the competition. Mom asked, which sport did you sign up for? The child shook his head and said, I didn\’t apply for anything. How embarrassing would it be if I didn\’t get the award? At that time, the mother talked a lot of reasons, and finally, the child reluctantly agreed to participate in a tug-of-war competition. Because this is a collectiveEven if he loses the project, no one will focus on him. A child with low self-esteem will be particularly concerned about what others think of him. Especially bad opinions may make him suffocated. In order to avoid being judged, he expressed himself as little as possible and hid himself in the crowd. When such a child grows up, even if there are opportunities, he may not be able to seize them due to low self-esteem and miss many opportunities. 03 Willing to meet strangers but afraid to socialize. In psychology, the definition of low self-esteem is: \”Deeply in the heart, you do not believe that you are good and worthy of being loved.\” People with a strong sense of inferiority, even if they have great achievements, Deep down, I still feel uneasy. Because he believes that his achievements are due to luck, and his own strength is actually very poor. Moreover, what others see is the surface, and the real him is actually very bad. If others get along with him a few more times, they will \”see through\” him and become disappointed and bored with him. In order to avoid others seeing that he is \”bad\”, he will try his best to hide himself and have less contact with others. Many children stay at home and are unwilling to go out. It may not be that they are introverted, but it may be that they have low self-esteem deep down. They are afraid of being rejected and ostracized socially, and they are also afraid of being seen through for their “bad” self. In order to avoid getting hurt, he is reluctant to meet strangers and does not like to socialize. 04 Fear of rejecting others A friend told me that her son is very generous and will give some small toys to other children when nothing happens. At first, she was quite pleased, thinking that her child was a gentleman and had good manners. But then something happened that completely changed her view. One time, a friend of my son came over to play. He took a fancy to a toy train and wanted to take it home. She just bought it for her child, and he hasn\’t even played with it a few times. The son didn\’t say anything at first, he just held on to the train and wouldn\’t let go. Seeing this, the little friend stood up and left: \”You are so stingy. If you don\’t give it to me, I will never play with you again.\” Unexpectedly, the son immediately caught up with him and reluctantly handed the small train to his friend: \”Here you go, but I also like it very much, please don\’t break it, okay?\” Seeing this, the friend was stunned. It\’s obviously your own thing, but you\’re obviously reluctant to part with it. Just refuse it. Why should you wrong yourself? What my mother doesn’t know is that not daring to reject others is a sign of low self-esteem. Because people with low self-esteem will think that they are \”weak\” and want to please others and be recognized by others. He often plays the role of \”good old guy\” and often puts himself in trouble to help others. Therefore, he does not dare to reject others, is afraid of being considered selfish and bad, and is afraid of making others unhappy and leaving him. When facing children with low self-esteem, the most important thing we need to do is to encourage and accept them more. For example, a child says, \”Mom, I don\’t dare.\” Let’s not rush to accuse and say, why are we so daring? What will we do if we are so cowardly? We might as well encourage him to make a little progress: \”Don\’t you dare to play with the children? How about we watch here for a while?\” Step by step, encourage the child to take a small step forward at a time. Slowly, the child can change Gotta be bold. Another example is when a child loses his temper in front of us. In fact, he dared to vent his emotions because he thought it was safe. Let\’s not be in a hurry firstGet angry and stop him, tell yourself to calm down and let him finish. Then listen to the child\’s heart, how does he feel, what does he want? If the child\’s request is reasonable, we don\’t have to ask the child to do just what we say. If your child\’s demands are excessive, we can tell him our feelings and concerns. When a child can freely express his feelings and emotions, he will have the confidence to reject others and become confident. Children who like to do the above four things often have low self-esteem. Have you ever seen such children?
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