Qian Zhongshu: How to implement good family education

Many people know Qian Zhongshu not only for his talent, not only \”Fortress Besieged\”, but also the relationship between him and his wife Yang Jiang, which is like \”the carriage and mail are very slow, and you only love one person in your life.\” One day in 1932, Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang met in Guyue Hall of Tsinghua University. In 1933, Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang got engaged. In 1937, daughter Qian Yuan was born. Qian Yuan was also a talented woman who once served as a professor in the English Department at Beijing Normal University. Although she passed away in 1997, the story of \”the three of us\” has been circulated to this day and touched countless people. From today\’s perspective, Qian Zhongshu\’s views on education are still alternative and interesting, without any hint of being outdated, and are worth pondering for parents who are now driven crazy by tutoring their children with homework. Today\’s parents will inevitably get angry and anxious when they encounter problems about their children\’s grades. The parent-child relationship has almost dropped to a freezing point. Parents are tired, and so are their children. Let us take a look at how Mr. Qian Zhongshu raises his children. Independent learning – the process of searching is the most important thing in learning. Yang Jiang mentioned in \”The Three of Us\”: \”She was learning a foreign language and there was a difficult word. She looked it up in three dictionaries but couldn\’t find it, so she came to ask her dad , Zhongshu didn’t tell her, and asked her to continue searching by herself, and she found the fifth dictionary.” When Qian Yuan wanted his father to tell her ancient poems, Qian Zhongshu said, “What’s so good about ancient poems? Go and see it yourself. !\” In this way, Yuanyuan, at a young age, embarked on a journey of independent reading in order to seek knowledge. Unanswered doubts became her best motivation for studying. Qian Zhongshu cultivated Qian Yuan\’s independent learning ability from an early age. Although the couple is both well-read and wealthy, they never easily answer their daughter\’s perplexing questions. They both know that the process of doubt and exploration is the magic weapon for gaining knowledge. Today\’s children, very few can learn independently. When I study, my parents accompany me. If I don’t know how, my parents look it up online. Even the homework assigned by the teacher is sent to the parents. From school to home, there is less and less space left for children to learn independently. Be interesting parents – this is an important condition for parents to become friends with their children. Qian Zhongshu has never been able to show off his father\’s majesty. He is even more naughty than his children. Fan Deng Reading Club teaches five compulsory family education courses for new parents [Video + Audio] Qian Zhongshu plants \”landmines\” in his daughter\’s bed every day before going to bed, placing large and small toys, mirrors, brushes, and even inkstones or large He buried all the brushes inside and waited for his daughter to scream. He was so happy that he could not wait to stuff the broom and dustpan into his daughter\’s bed. Before my daughter goes to bed, she must carefully search and take out everything from the quilt. It\’s not much fun to play this kind of prank every day, but Qian Zhongshu never tires of playing it. Yang Jiang mentioned in \”The Three of Us\”: \”A Yuan often said when he was a child: \’My father and I are the best buddies. We are my mother\’s two naughty boys. My father is not worthy of being my elder brother, but only worthy of being my younger brother.\” Qian Zhongshu Although he is busy, he is not absent from family life. During the critical period of his daughter\’s childhood growth, more often than not, he did not have the authority of a strict father at all, but regarded himself as his daughter\’s best \”playmate\” in childhood. Interesting parents not only become friends with their children, but also cultivate their children to become interesting people. \”Interesting\” is such an important quality, no matter what difficulties we encounter,Being interesting can always get through the difficulties without getting into trouble. Love between husband and wife is the best education for children. When Yang Jiang was studying, she read a British biographer describing the ideal state of marriage: \”Before I met her, I never thought about getting married. I married her for decades and never regretted marrying her.\” She has never thought about marrying another woman.\” She read this paragraph to Qian Zhongshu, and he immediately expressed his stance: \”I am the same as him.\” Yang Jiang also immediately responded: \”Me too.\” The couple said to each other Falling in love is an expression of loving children. Only when children grow up in an environment full of love can they learn how to love and express love. Because of the high pressure in life, today\’s couples generally have poor emotional management skills and quarrel at every turn. This has an extremely negative impact on children. Zuckerberg once mentioned in a speech at North Carolina State University, \”In fact, compared to Facebook, the joy and happiness of my life come from my family!\” Although Zuckerberg\’s career has gradually grown, the couple Still retaining the original sweetness, the way of getting along is simple and pure. A harmonious and loving relationship between parents provides a subtle education to children, making them peaceful and friendly to the world around them. Create an atmosphere and treat them as equals. Qian Zhongshu and Mr. Yang Jiang discussed ancient poems at home, and Yuanyuan listened fascinated. The next day, the daughter asked her father to recite ancient poems to her. Yuanyuan saw that her parents were \”ready to read\”, so she followed suit and picked up a book to read, and she gradually learned how to read. Qian Zhongshu and his wife Yang Jiang often discuss academics. This atmosphere at home deeply affects and infects their daughter, stimulating little Qian Yuan\’s curious heart, and at the same time, it also subtly shapes her character. When Qian Zhong wrote \”Fortress Besieged\”, he told his daughter that there was an ugly child in it, and that was her. Ah Yuan believed it to be true, but didn\’t care about it. Later, when he wrote \”Lily Heart\”, he said that the most annoying girl in it was her. At this time, A-Yuan was a little older. She was afraid that her father would wrongly accuse her, so she would peek at his manuscripts every day, so Qian Zhongshu would hide the manuscripts in a different place every day. One hides and the other finds, it becomes a hide-and-seek game. Later, even Qian Zhongshu himself didn\’t know where the manuscript was hidden. Although the couple are both prominent figures in Chinese academic circles, they have never had the stature and airs of a scholar, not even at home. In the family, he regards children as friends. Three people are talking on the same footing, with equal status, listening to each other and respecting each other. Yang Jiang said: \”Our family is very simple, the three of us are very simple, and the three of us are an unusual meeting.\” The simplicity of life means two people in one house, three meals a day, four seasons. But the light of life is the fun found in the ordinary. I hope we can all be the one-in-a-million, fun parents.