Should children be given pocket money?

The outlook on wealth is a very important part of the outlook on life. How a person treats money is often an external manifestation of how a person treats life. Nowadays, people advocate financial education for children from an early age. I think the most important financial education is not to teach children how to use 1 yuan to earn 10 yuan, but to let them know the nature of money and the role of money in life. What status should be, what attitude we should have towards money. CCTV recommends over 500 high-scoring excellent documentaries. Children will become addicted to self-discipline after watching the pattern. My daughter Yuanyuan, like many children, has also shown a preference for money since she was a child, especially around the age of 3. She is most interested in money and possesses it. Desire to show without concealment. Once, I took her back to my mother\’s house during vacation and gave my mother some money. Yuanyuan saw it and refused to give it to me. I ignored her and asked my mother to keep the money. Two days later, I took Yuanyuan to a small store to buy soy sauce, vinegar and a few other things. I spent a 100-yuan note on it, and the store asked me for a 50-yuan note and some change. When I put the change into my coin purse, Yuanyuan pointed to the many pieces of change and said to me, \”Mom, give these to grandma.\” Then she pointed to the 50 yuan piece and said, \”Don\’t give this one to grandma.\” I was both surprised and amused. Such a young child actually knows that this piece of money is worth more than those pieces of money. What a gift! She loves sweets very much. One day her grandma teased her and said, \”If you love sweets so much, when you grow up, find a candy seller and get married. You can eat sweets every day.\” Yuanyuan thought about it and said, \”No, I want to find someone who sells sweets.\” Marry a money seller.\” The whole family was shocked by her words and laughed that this little person really has a sense of money. It is human nature to love money, so I will never do anything that goes against nature. I want to satisfy her nature. Since Yuanyuan entered the first grade of elementary school, I have given her a fixed pocket money of 3 to 5 yuan every month. Yuanyuan calls this regular money \”salary.\” The amount I gave Yuanyuan seems a bit low now, but according to the consumption level at that time, it was still appropriate for a primary school student, because her pocket money was limited to buying \”useless\” things from the stalls at the school gate, such as Small stickers, small cards, etc. The amount and expense content were jointly determined by us and our children, and both parties were happy to accept it. Yuanyuan cares about this income very much. She can clearly remember the day when it is time to \”pay wages\” every month, and will remind us when the time comes. I completely allowed her to control this pocket money on her own and rarely asked about it. There was only one request: no junk food. Yuanyuan occasionally wants to buy something, but her salary savings are not enough, so I ask her to advance from next month\’s salary in advance; if she really overspends a lot, I will give her some extra, and the extra part is jokingly called a \”bonus.\” . In short, when it comes to spending money, I first show trust and tolerance to my children and never worry about it. I don\’t ask what she bought or whether she saved the unspent money. I don\’t require Yuanyuan to spend her money correctly. Sometimes she buys bad gadgets or gets cheated by vendors. I don\’t criticize her, I just laugh it off. At most, I tell her about my relevant shopping experience. . I believe she bought something she shouldn\’t have bought this time and found that her money was wasted. She will learn how to choose next time. Only after experiencing mistakes in decision-making canBe able to become shrewd in future decisions. When Yuanyuan was in junior high school, her salary increased to about 10 yuan. As she grew older, she paid less and less attention to the money. She often forgot to ask for her salary. Only when she needed money did she realize that her monthly salary was still enough. Not sent. I don’t remember when this salary game ended. It seems that it hasn’t been paid since high school. Of course, Yuanyuan will not become strapped for money just because she has no salary. Although our financial situation was very ordinary at the time, as long as she asked what she needed to buy, we would try our best to meet her needs and rarely refuse. Occasionally, if something is a bit expensive, or something should not be bought, we will say it, and the children will generally understand. When I did this, it was not very clearly to provide her with so-called \”financial management education\”. It should be said that it was just out of motherly love and nature. Yuanyuan generally does not make demands that exceed our consumption capacity. This is because family finances are always open to children, and her parents have set an example for her, so Yuanyuan naturally knows what is within the scope of consumption. Which ones are not there. On the other hand, her parents have never been harsh on her when it comes to spending money. She has never had to use any scheming to compete with her parents. Instead, her mentality is extremely simple and she has never learned to be greedy or calculating. Some parents never give their children pocket money in order to prevent their children from developing the habit of spending money randomly. They will say that if the child needs anything, just tell the parents. If it is needed, money will be given to him. If he does not need it, he will not be given money. Although this approach has a good goal, the result may be disappointing to the parents. Because this kind of control itself expresses distrust, deprives children of their free choice in consumption, and is very harsh, it is not beneficial to the development of children\’s concept of money. People who were severely short of money in childhood are more likely to become people who care about money as adults, are overly stingy or greedy, and lack a sense of normalcy. There are also some parents who do not directly give pocket money to their children because they are worried that their children will develop the mentality of getting something for nothing and earn pocket money by asking their children to do housework. This has been learned from Western countries in recent years and has become very popular. I do not agree with this approach either. The reason is that \”home\” is the most important place in a person\’s life. It is not a market, a unit, or a circle. \”Emotions\” are the coagulant and lubricant of family members, and are necessities and luxuries in family life. If children are paid to do some housework, there may be hidden problems. One is to reduce family relationships to business relationships and treat mutual assistance between relatives as an exchange of interests. This is incompatible with our traditional culture and will weaken the relationship between children and parents. Chinese people have always paid attention to filial piety to their parents and pursued a warm family atmosphere. Why are European and American countries, especially the United States, called hell for the elderly? Many elderly people have children but die in loneliness. I think this is related to the fact that they introduced market laws into family life early. Culture always has it. of cause and effect. Second, it is easy to develop a profit-seeking mentality. A relative of mine once implemented a work-based payment policy for his children, stipulating how much it would cost to wash the dishes, wipe the floor, and wash the clothes. At the end he saidNowadays, children have to ask if there is money for everything they do. Even if it is a simple matter of throwing away garbage, they still have to ask how much they will pay. The habit of getting paid according to work has indeed been cultivated in children, but the profit-seeking mentality has also begun to show its signs. Third, it will cause children to have a negative understanding of labor. Children themselves like to work. If a child has to be paid because he has done a little work, this actually implies that labor is hard work; moreover, a child\’s nature is willing to please his parents. If his labor brings benefits to his parents, Without happiness, a child is happier inside than with money. This kind of happiness will stimulate his love for labor. Paying money not only eliminates the value and happiness of labor, but also eliminates his interest in doing things for his parents. In fact, not all Westerners agree with the behavior of paying children to do housework. Mr. Leif, a famous American teacher, believes: \”It is good to give children pocket money for doing housework. After all, this is how our capitalism works – with Work and earn money – but it is very dangerous to use gifts or money in exchange for children\’s good behavior. We should let children know that appropriate behavior is expected and does not need to be rewarded.\” I believe that everything good in children should be cultivated Character cannot be bought with money. Anything that can be bought with money is not called education. It is a temporary achievement and cannot be internalized into the child\’s own character and habits. For example, some parents use money to stimulate their children\’s learning, reward their children with money if they do well in exams, or stipulate how much money will be given based on the number of points they get in the exam. These practices may be effective in the short term, but in the long term they can only cause dissolution. I once saw a piece of news on the Internet. In order to encourage her children in primary school to study hard, a mother set a bonus standard based on performance. The higher the test score, the more bonuses she would get. So the child wrote an article \”Studying well is the key to success.\” My Way to Make Money\”. I am very worried that if this practice continues, children\’s motivation to learn will become weaker and weaker, the way to make money will become narrower and narrower, and the entire value system will be distorted. If parents think that spending money can buy their children good working character and good study habits, in fact, your most direct appeal is: money is everything. Then the child will accept this concept, and in the future he may spend money to buy friendship, spend money to buy a career, spend money to buy love… If when a child grows up, all his affairs are linked to monetary rewards and punishments, then he will In the future, it is likely that all relationships will be treated as money relationships.