Smart parents stand shoulder to shoulder with their children

On New Year\’s Eve, after watching TV and scrolling through Moments, someone posted something, \”The most classic line of this year\’s Spring Festival Gala: Educating children is not only a matter of school, but also inseparable from family education. Giving children the best love is not just about material things.\” Satisfaction, and more importantly, high-quality companionship.\” I watched that sketch show. The couple only cared about making money abroad and left their children alone at home, so that they became troubled teenagers and developed a lot of bad habits. I remembered that I went to visit my cousin\’s house on the 28th day of the twelfth lunar month. As soon as I entered the corridor, I heard the sound of quarreling. When I listened carefully, it turned out to be the couple from my cousin\’s family. I hurried upstairs and knocked on the door. My cousin and her husband were like a pair of fighting cocks, having a huge quarrel because of their child\’s poor test scores. My cousin\’s husband works in a group company. He was sent to other places as the sales general manager the year before last. He earned a good income, but he didn\’t go home all year round. He asked his cousin to resign when their son first entered high school and concentrate on studying with his child. He wanted his son to Get into a good university. But my cousin has had a \”second career\” in recent years, which is playing mahjong. In the past few years, I didn\’t even bother to eat after work every day, so I hurried to the venue. My cousin-in-law was still at home at that time, and he was basically supervising my child’s studies, so his grades were pretty good. I originally thought that my cousin would resign so that she could concentrate on spending time with her children. However, I didn’t expect that after she lost the constraints of her job, she became more addicted to mahjong than before. She didn’t care about black and white. She didn’t even care about the children’s meals. Most of the time, she just gave him some money and let him play by himself. Grab a bite to eat on the way or order takeout. Now, the child lets go and plays. During the winter vacation, my cousin-in-law went to a parent-teacher meeting, and his son ranked last in the class with the worst grades. When my cousin-in-law came home, he went crazy with his cousin, and he was still angry for several days. What made him even more angry was that his son\’s grades were so poor, yet he looked innocent. When his cousin-in-law yelled at him, he seemed not to hear him. I understand how my cousin-in-law feels. He works hard outside to support his family, and wants to make it easier for his wife and for his children to get good grades, but the result is that he is disappointed, so he is very angry. Children in this period can easily go off track if they are not careful. I remember last summer, a reader confided his troubles to me: \”Hello Su Xin, I want to tell you about myself. I am a middle-aged woman who owns a company. I am one of the legendary women. Be strong. Ten years ago, I divorced and my daughter came with me. She is now seventeen years old. Over the years, I have been doing business and could not take care of my daughter, so I put her in boarding school and came home once a semester. But This child is becoming more and more rebellious and always deliberately goes against me. She dropped out of high school after a few days and decided to learn painting on a whim. As a result, she spent a lot of money and was dismissed from the school within a few months. This year, I went to Korea to study fashion design again and spent a lot of money, but I still can’t stick to it. She has no long-term experience in anything she studies, and her relationship with teachers and classmates is always difficult. Her relationship with me is even more tense. We are two mothers. It\’s hard to communicate, and I get into big quarrels when I don\’t agree. I\’m so desperate now, I don\’t know how to educate her.\” I replied to her: \”The \”control\” of the child during the growth stage is very important. This \”control\” is not simple. Control, but includes love, correction, and companionship. When children are sixteen or seventeen years old, they are in adolescence, rebellious, and paranoid, soThese characteristics of wanting to oppose parents are more obvious. Children who grow up in love are mostly soft-hearted and gentle in character, and their rebellious characteristics will be weakened a lot. Many children in single-parent families spend their time in quarrels between their parents. Those days have a great impact on them, and the symptoms of adolescence will be more prominent. At this period, the child\’s outlook on life, worldview and values ​​are still immature. As a mother, in addition to giving her money, you should give her love, care, high-quality companionship, and help her build a correct outlook on life. The relationship between your mother and daughter is so tense, and it is naturally difficult for her to get along well with the world, which is also the reason why she cannot go to school time and time again. Because of making money, because of marriage troubles, and for various reasons, if you miss the growth of your children, you have to pay a price or double your time to make up for it. Just like a person who did not study hard when he was a teenager, if he wants to achieve some results after entering society, he will have to work several times more than when he was a teenager. Or, one day she will become sensible and understand how difficult it is for you to be a woman and a mother. She will understand your painstaking efforts and dedication, and she will understand that you are the person who loves her most in the world. \”Actually, when I typed those words, I felt very guilty, because I knew that it would be too difficult to recover after missing the best time to accompany my children. Mr. Long Yingtai said in her article \”Parents Have an Expiration Date\” 》It says that if children are carefully educated and provided with support during the ten years when they are most dependent, once the children reach adolescence, no matter how hard parents try, they will no longer be able to provide substantial influence. If parents neglect to educate their children when they need it, they will be in trouble in the future. No matter how rebellious the child is, parents can only shake their heads and sigh. Once at the end of the term, I went to hold a parent-teacher meeting for my daughter. The head teacher said sincerely: I have a favor for all parents. Please accompany me during the holidays. Good children, don’t just play mahjong or play with your mobile phone. Children are children, and their self-discipline is still very poor. They need your constant supervision and guidance to make sure they don’t waste their vacation. Our goal is to hope that our children will have a A good future, then, let’s work hard together! That is the most affectionate request from the teacher I have ever heard. It almost made me stunned. Yes, if you want a child who works hard and is self-disciplined, you must first be the one who works hard and is self-disciplined. Parents! In a family, no one should be an isolated island. If you push your child into the vast sea and let him swim alone, you will neither encourage him nor give him strength. You will only provide him with encouragement. How strong must he be to become his own ferryman? At this time, the high-quality companionship of parents is the greatest confidence for children to face all this. In the face of unexpected storms in growth, you have to grasp Keep the little hands that control your child\’s life, give him timely support, and use your vision and experience to guide him safely through the reefs and dangerous shoals. You want him to know that he is not fighting alone. , and his parents are behind him, giving him confidence, courage and strength. Smart parents are side by side with their children. My dear, the new semester has begun, life is like an uphill journey, and learning is like a sea of ​​rivers and lakes. May you use your pen as a sword to fight hard and achieve success. A world of your own, live up to your youth, yourself, and expectations. With parents aroundOn the other hand, you can feel free to go on your journey. In the future, you will definitely thank yourself for your hard work now! work hard together!