Stop losing your temper with your children in the name of love

A reader added my WeChat account and his first sentence was: I am an incompetent mother. Am I being selfish? I replied to her: What\’s wrong? She said: I often can\’t control my emotions and often get angry with my children! Often getting angry with their children is a problem that many mothers often encounter. When children are disobedient, talk back, do not do their homework, or act naughty – they will always make us angry. Therefore, the yelling mother appears, the angry mother appears, There are even many mothers who often beat their children. This mother has two boys at home. The eldest son is 13 years old and the younger son is 6 years old. And she only gets angry at her eldest son, because her younger son is very good. For example, if you play with your mobile phone for twenty minutes and then do your homework. But when the eldest son arrived at the appointed time, he still continued to play with his mobile phone. She warned again, but he remained unmoved, so she couldn\’t help but start scolding him. But the eldest son not only disobeyed, but also talked back. She was already very angry. When the eldest son said something pointedly at her, he said something back, which made her even more angry and angry. After a while, she He would slap his eldest son in the face. As a result, she used force to end the dispute every time. This kid is so stubborn. Fortunately, my younger son is okay. Whenever her youngest son made a mistake and she wanted to get angry, she would beg for mercy: \”Mom, I was wrong. I will never dare to be angry with my mother again.\” Could it be that a thirteen or fourteen year old child is not as sensible as a five or six year old child? Every two or three days, the eldest son would receive a beating. The younger son had basically never experienced the taste of corporal punishment. She would regret it every time after the fight. When my son was spanked in the past, he would cry and scream. Now that he is older, he no longer cries every time he is spanked. However, his ability to talk back has improved a lot and he never begs for mercy. Originally, he made a mistake. He wouldn\’t have been beaten, but seeing his irritating look and attitude, he became more and more angry, and in the end a beating was unavoidable. After you calm down and think about it, it’s not a big deal. Why did you lose your temper and hit the child again? I got angry just now because my eldest son was playing with his mobile phone. His eyes were already myopic, but he still played with his mobile phone. The time limit has long been exceeded, but I still disobey. I asked for the mobile phone from his hand, but when he refused to give it to me, I immediately became angry. I have become short-sighted at such a young age. What should I do in the future? Do you still want to control your eyes? The more he talked, the angrier he became. Looking at his son wearing glasses, he couldn\’t help but lost his temper and started to fight with the child. But think about it, children are so innocent. They have their own ideas and thoughts, but we always want them to act according to our wishes. \”I am doing this all for your own good.\” In fact, But when they deviated from their expectations, our temper became unbearable. Before the beating, I was almost mad at him. After the beating, my intestines were filled with regret. Every mother who spanks her child will regret it after the spanking. The child\’s playfulness, willfulness, disobedience, and ignorance are challenging our patience. When I get angry, I can\’t control it. How many parents are the same as this mother?Such a feeling. I procrastinated on homework, went to eat without washing my hands, bought a toy yesterday and had to buy another toy today, and cried in the mall and refused to leave. When walking on the street, we often see parents yelling at their children, or even fighting. Children are so ignorant, obedient, and do not understand their parents. A story of deep love. In the past two years, a four-frame comic \”Mom Hit Me Again\”, in which a mother slapped her daughter, also became popular on the Internet. The story is like this: In the first frame, the mother smiled and said to her daughter who was studying: After studying for a day, mom will take you to the park to play! In the second frame, the daughter smiled and answered her mother: No, Mom, I like to study. In the third frame, the story was turbulent. Without saying a word, the mother suddenly stretched out her left hand with \”thunder speed\” and slapped her daughter. In the fourth frame, the speechless daughter covered the right side of her face with her hand, looking aggrieved and sad. Is the mother in the comic unreasonable? The child loves to study, so he slaps him? But the fact is: the child went against the mother\’s wishes and was punished. You want to study and your mother asks you to go to the park. If you don\’t go, you will be beaten. As parents, when we treat our children, do we often behave like the mother in the cartoon? Because we and our children have different ways of looking at problems, and what we think is right may not necessarily be the same for our children. For children, loving to learn and loving to play games are both hobbies. There is no difference for them to do what they like. But for parents, there is right and wrong. You are right to study. , it is worth encouraging, playing games is wrong and should be banned. In our opinion, it is so unkind and unreasonable for a mother who wants to go to the park to slap her daughter who loves to study. In fact, whenever we get angry with our children, most of them are because of the children. Against our will. Child, how pitiful. There is a story about a mother who was often angry with her son. Later, every time the mother got angry, she would drive a nail into the white wall. Wait until the anger subsides before pulling out the nail. Within a year, the walls were covered with nail holes. Looking at the devastated wall, the mother made up her mind that she would never get angry at her children again. Every mother has a variety of reasons when she spanks her child. No one spanks her child for no reason or loses her temper. However, have you ever thought about the damage to the child\’s heart and the damage to the parent-child relationship? been greatly affected. Often, children who grow up with beatings and scoldings learn from their mother\’s violence, become more rebellious, and become even more ignorant and disobedient. Most of the children educated by mothers who are not angry are well-behaved and sensible. \”Take a snail for a walk\”, are you impatient? However, he has tried his best. He is not a horse, but you raised the whip. If you calm down, walk slowly with him, smell the flowers and look at the scenery together, you won\’t be angry with him anymore. When we get angry, onlyHe vented his bad emotions and caused harm to the child\’s body and mind, but it did not achieve the ultimate purpose of educating the child. To be a mother who doesn\’t lose your temper is to truly love your children. Don\’t hurt your children in the name of love!