The age of 3 determines a child’s life, so fathers must take a good look at it

It’s really enviable to see such a scene: three children, three desks, and a wall full of awards. The three children were sitting at the desk, each writing their own homework, focused and serious. The father sat behind the children and read a book seriously. The four father and son turned the whole room into a classroom full of love. (Photo source: Douyin Southeast Morning News) What’s even more rare is that this father squeezes out time to help his three children with their homework almost every day. Sometimes I help my children answer difficult questions, sometimes I check their children\’s recitation, and sometimes I talk to my children about what happened at school and what happened at my own work. He is not only a father who sets an example in the eyes of his children, a comrade who fights side by side, but also a confidant friend to his children. Netizens couldn\’t help but sigh: \”No wonder his house has a wall full of awards.\” For a child, a father\’s love and companionship are worth more than 100 good teachers. Do you still remember the father born in the 1980s who practiced dancing with his son some time ago and received millions of likes? My son has fallen in love with hip-hop since watching the first \”This is Street Dance\” competition. Not only did the father enroll his children in dance classes, he also taught himself how to dance on the computer. From 2018 to now, for more than three years, my father has been practicing dance with his son. Lu Huiping\’s Good Parents Determine Their Children\’s Life Video Download + PDF e-book Nowadays, the father with a round figure dances with smooth movements and full aura, no less than his energetic son. The father said in the interview: \”The original intention of dancing with my children is, firstly, to help their health, and secondly, to make the parent-child relationship closer. The most important thing is the relationship with the children.\” As the father hoped, his relationship with his son is like Friends talk about everything. I remember Luo Zhenyu once said this in \”Qi Pa Shuo\”: \”Dads are the most useless maternal and infant products.\” The white paper \”The Current Situation of Chinese Family Education\” also shows: \”Less than 20% of families in which fathers dominate education.\” In reality , like the two fathers above, there are very few fathers who are willing to accompany their children to grow up and participate in their children\’s lives. Many fathers feel that it is the mother\’s business to educate their children, and they only need to make money to support the family. As everyone knows, the responsibility and influence of a father\’s role are irreplaceable. In many aspects, no matter how capable a mother is, she cannot replace a father. The absence of paternal education will make girls lack love throughout their lives and boys will lack calcium throughout their lives. Sun Yunxiao, a researcher at the China Youth Research Center, once told such a case. A strong-backed young man, but weaker than a sheep. When he was in elementary school and middle school, he was often bullied and did not dare to fight back. He always endured it silently. He always looked timid, hesitant to speak, and hesitant to do things. What\’s even more annoying is that when the teacher criticizes him, he sheds tears. When faced with difficulties, he retreated. After he grew up and started working, he became very suspicious. When he saw others whispering, he felt that they were talking about him. As a result, he became uneasy and continued to lose his job. Until he was in his mid-twenties, he did not have a regular job. Through communication, teacher Sun Yunxiao discovered that the root cause of his timidity, cowardice, low self-esteem, and sensitive personality was precisely the lack of parental education. His father was indifferent while he was growing up, while his mother was too protective and doting. Psychologist Gerdi once said: \”Men are moreWomen are more adventurous, exploring, tolerant, and curious. These characteristics will be vividly reflected in the education of their children. \”Compared with the mother\’s delicate tenderness and careful protection, the father\’s unique \”masculine strength\” such as roughness, courage and majesty are essential nutrients for a boy to grow into a man. Moreover, studies have long confirmed that if the father is at home Be decisive and dominant, boys tend to show a high degree of masculinity. If the father is weak at home and the mother is dominant, the boy will show more feminine characteristics. The boy\’s masculinity cannot be separated from Open up the father\’s example and influence. The father is the bridge for a boy to grow into a man. Similarly, the father also has a huge influence on the growth of a girl. I remember someone said this: \”Boys often regard their father as their future development.\” example. Girls learn how to get along with the opposite sex by observing their fathers. \”There is a question on Zhihu: Girls who lack father\’s love since childhood, what impact will it have on love and sexual relations when they grow up? The answers from netizens are thought-provoking: \”I have low self-esteem, worry about gains and losses, and are easily tempted by other people\’s good things. It is easy to fall into feelings and always want to achieve salvation through love and make up for the lack of love and security. \”Once you fall in love, you completely lose yourself. You don\’t want to leave even if you know the other person is a scumbag.\” \”I prefer to find my uncle to make up for the father\’s love I didn\’t get during my childhood.\” \”How a father gets along with his daughter determines how the girl gets along with the opposite sex. Linda Nelson, a psychology professor who has studied father-daughter relationships for decades, said: \”If a woman can get affirmation and approval from her father since she was a child, she will not Desperately trying to get these things from other men because she already has them. \”After all, a girl who lacks father\’s love is constantly \”looking for her father\” throughout her life. \”The lack of father\’s love is like deep pits buried in advance on the road to their future marriage and love. Just like \”Gillian\” who is always hurt by love. The humble flattery is exchanged for one The whole body was bruised and bruised every time. 6980 Yuan Zhang Guowei\’s Comprehensive Parent-Child Relationship Skills Recording + Handouts + Quick Notes is like Lin Enjing, who married the 57-year-old Taiwanese musician Li Kunchen at the age of 17. They are both girls who have never received the love of their father. So, Dad You must participate in your child\’s growth and education. The absence of father\’s education will make boys lack calcium throughout their lives, and girls will lack love throughout their lives. Only by injecting more \”masculine power\” into the growth of boys can boys become independent, brave, and brave. Be responsible. Only by letting a girl feel love from her father can she have enough sense of security and learn how to love herself and others. What dad gives boys is a rule education, and what he gives girls is bottom line education. It is said that maternal love is like water, and father’s love is like water. Love is like a mountain. Maternal love is delicate and gentle, a kind of \”sensory\” education, to nourish life. Father\’s love, rough and majestic, is a kind of \”rational\” education, to establish the backbone of a child\’s life. Therefore, dad will not be like A mother takes care of her children in every detail and protects them carefully. A father will give his children more freedom and space, and is more inclined to let the children recognize themselves.know this world. Therefore, fathers will set some rules and bottom lines for their children so that they have the courage to try and know what they can and cannot do and where the boundaries are. I have read two very classic stories: The first story is told by the writer Luo Song and is about girls. An adolescent girl came home early in the morning. Instead of reprimanding her, her father invited her out for a drink a few days later. The father told the girl: \”You dare to drink. When you get drunk, dad will take you home.\” As a result, the girl was really drunk and fell unconscious. When she woke up the next day, she saw a letter from her father: \”Do you remember how much you drank last night and got drunk? A total of 2 glasses of beer and 5 glasses of high. Remember, this is Your bottom line! I can\’t always be by your side to protect you, but you have to know your bottom line and learn to protect yourself.\” I have a daughter, and what I\’m most afraid of is that she will be hurt by someone who doesn\’t treat her well. Tell your daughter what her safety bottom line is, so that her daughter will not put herself in danger easily, and will not give others the opportunity to harm herself, so that she can live a sane and clear life. Bottom-line education is the best protection and the deepest love for your daughter. The second story is told by writer Lin Xi and is about a boy. A boy got into a fight with his classmates and cried when he came home. The father asked him: \”Are you wronged and angry?\” The boy said bitterly: \”I want revenge.\” The father did not directly say that what he did was wrong, but continued to ask him: \”What do you want to do?\” The boy said: \”Find a stick, no, I will stab him with a sword like on TV.\” The father still said, \”Okay, this will relieve your anger. Dad will help you prepare.\” A few minutes later, the father held him in his arms. Clothes and quilts go downstairs. The boy looked surprised and asked: \”Why did you bring so many clothes?\” The father said: \”If you use a stick, you will be taken to a juvenile detention center and will stay at least a month, so I will bring you a change of clothes. If you use a sword Thorn, you are going to stay for a long time, and I must prepare a quilt for you.\” The boy blushed and asked, \”Is this really going to happen?\” His father said categorically, \”This is what the law stipulates.\” After listening to his father\’s words, The boy\’s previous impulse and anger were wiped away. After thinking calmly, he said to his father: \”Then let\’s forget it. In fact, I was also wrong. I will apologize to him.\” It is the boy\’s nature to be naughty and aggressive. Suppressing it and obeying it are both likely to kill a boy. Letting children know the consequences of not obeying the rules, using rules education to balance risks, and letting boys learn self-control is the best education for boys. A father is like the anchor of stability in a child\’s life. The bottom-line education he gives to girls and the rules education he gives to boys not only bring protection, support and security to the children, but also give them wings, allowing them to fly freely within safe boundaries. Dad must do these 7 things well. Yale University in the United States once conducted a 12-year study on \”Whether a father is actively involved in the growth of his child, and what impact it will have on the child.\” The results found that if the father is highly involved in the child\’s growth process, the child\’s Higher IQ, better grades, and more success in society. The child\’s future is hidden in the father\’s company. Often doing the following little things can not only strengthen your relationship with your children,The relationship between children can also allow children to experience their father\’s \”different power.\” 1. Play some stimulating and confrontational games with your children. In real life, mothers have a stronger sense of protection when raising their children than fathers. Children who are too close to their mothers may become timid and timid. Dad often takes his children to play some stimulating and confrontational games, such as running, playing ball, boxing, mountain climbing… The children will be more enterprising and adventurous. 2. Take a trip alone with your kids. A father and his son rode 2,200 kilometers of National Highway 318 Sichuan-Tibet Line for 24 days during the summer vacation. The father and son climbed four 4,000-meter mountains in one day, and the daily distance was equivalent to a full marathon. Although the journey was bumpy and hard, the child persevered. The child said: \”Dad is with me. If dad can do it, I can do it too.\” Traveling with your child alone is the best opportunity to have close contact with your child. One-on-one time alone can help a father who is not good at expressing himself. Establish communication with children in your own way and achieve deep spiritual connections. Children will gain a kind of inner male strength from it and become more determined and brave. 3. Be sure to pick up and drop off your children frequently and chat with them more on the way. No matter how busy the father is, he must take time to pick up and drop off his children more, and seize the ten minutes on the way to school and home. Chat with your children about your day, discuss what you saw on the road, and let your children express their complaints and opinions. Dad\’s wholehearted companionship, even a smile, a hug, and a compliment can make the child feel his father\’s love and attention for him. 4. When your children are worried, act as their “intimate brother”. Professor Li Meijin said: The best companionship is spiritual companionship. Only when a father puts down his airs, communicates with his children as equals, listens to his children\’s inner voices, and makes suggestions for his children like a friend can he convey love, trust and security to his children, and establish a close parent-child relationship. 5. Praise your children a lot. The book \”Psychological Nutrition\” says: \”If mothers are more important than fathers in terms of providing a sense of security, then in terms of affirmation and recognition, fathers are more important than mothers.\” And there is data showing: The father\’s affirmation and recognition of his children are 50 times more effective than the mother\’s affirmation and recognition of their children. Children always worship their father unconsciously and take their father as an example. Dad’s affirmation, recognition and praise will make children feel more valuable and more confident. 6. Don’t break your promise to your children. A 2005 national survey by the China Youth Research Center found that among the 12 behaviors that primary and secondary school students are most dissatisfied with their parents for, \”talking without keeping\” accounted for 43.6%, ranking first. Dad is a symbol of authority in the eyes of children, and children have the highest level of trust in dad. If a father breaks his word, it will not only disappoint his children, put the parent-child relationship in jeopardy, but even put family education in trouble. Therefore, by paying attention to every agreement with your children and leading by example, family education can be smooth and effective. 7. Prepare meals carefully for your children. There was a father on Zhihu who insisted on cooking for his daughter no matter how busy he was at work. growing up in children52 compulsory lessons for Chinese parents during the critical period mp3. The baby meal he made for his daughter was not only delicious and delicious, but also the same for 20 days. It is said that the temperature of the kitchen determines the temperature of the home. The meals carefully prepared by the father for the children are the warmth of the children\’s soul. When a child eats the food cooked by his father and feels his tenderness, his heart will be filled with sunshine. In fact, dad\’s love and companionship are far more important than we think. Because, both boys and girls need a very strong, powerful and authoritative love. And the father’s innate advantages as a man are exactly what his children need most. Having a father who is never absent is the greatest luck in a child\’s life.