The consequences of beating and scolding children for a long time

Nowadays, more and more parents are beginning to understand the importance of positive education and know that they cannot beat or scold their children. However, when they really face the \”naughty children\” at home, most parents still cannot control their emotions. When disciplining children, \”beating and scolding\” can be said to be the most effective method, and can quickly calm down \”naughty children\”. Although this kind of discipline seems to be very effective, it also has negative effects on children, especially for those children who remain silent after being scolded. This kind of discipline has a greater negative impact. Parents, have you ever observed your child\’s reaction after being scolded? Generally speaking, children will be in a more excited state after being scolded. Some children will be unconvinced, \”talk back\” to their parents, and refuse to give up. Although some children feel aggrieved, they dare not say a word and choose to remain silent, shed tears silently or hide somewhere to relieve their emotions. As parents, do you hope that your children will \”never fight back when hit or scolded\”, or will they still talk back and make excuses for themselves? Perhaps many parents think that children who \”don\’t fight back when hit or scold\” are better because they are more obedient and docile and know how to respect their parents, while children who talk back are young and do not know how to respect their parents. In the beginning, I was one of the parents who had these ideas. Because I have a daughter who loves to \”talk back\” and argue with reason. Whenever I educate my daughter, she always looks unconvinced and raises her neck to reason with me. But slowly I discovered that when my daughter was arguing with me, she expressed many ideas that I ignored. Through this kind of \”argument\” between mother and daughter, I found that I was more able to see the problem from the child\’s perspective and better understand her psychology. Usually after such an \”argument\”, my daughter and I can vent our emotions. After the incident, she was still my caring, clingy, \”little cotton-padded jacket\” who talked about everything. Unlike my daughter who is very articulate, my friend’s son is very “obedient and sensible”. When faced with the \”beating and scolding\” of his parents, he often chose to remain silent and hide in his room alone to digest his emotions afterwards. At first, I would envy my friend for having an obedient and sensible child who would not talk back to his parents in a big way. But slowly, from my friend’s mouth, I felt her helplessness. She found that the distance between herself and her son was getting farther and farther. The child was unwilling to share his worries with his parents, and the parent-child relationship became increasingly distant. In fact, when a child is scolded, his reaction has a lot to do with his future character. Those children who like to \”talk back\” and appear to be young and old are often more confident, cheerful and brave children. When encountering problems, they will have the courage to speak up for themselves and safeguard their rights and interests. And those children who remain silent after being scolded by their parents and digest it silently are often not confident enough in character, have low self-esteem, and dare not speak up for themselves. They are prone to have a \”pleasant personality\” and feel wronged in order to please others. No matter how a child reacts to being beaten and scolded, the negative impact of this educational method is very large. As parents, we must be cautious in using this method of discipline. Some parents may say, which sounds simple to say, but is too difficult to operate. After all, no one is a saint, and many times parents just can\’t control their emotions and can\’t help beating or scolding their children. If the harm to the child has been caused, parents actually have ways to remedy it. After parents beat and scold their children, they can do these three things to minimize the harm to their children. The first thing: Apologize sincerely. If parents fail to control their emotions in an emergency and beat and scold their children. , after calming down, be sure to apologize to your child as soon as possible. If parents can put down the so-called \”air\” and sincerely apologize to their children, the children will also understand and forgive their parents. When children are beaten or scolded, they tend to become more emotional, have a hostile relationship with their parents, and mistakenly think that their parents do not love them. After the incident occurs, parents apologize in time, which will give them great comfort. Doing so will also help ease the parent-child relationship. CCTV recommends over 500 high-scoring documentaries. Children will become addicted to self-discipline after watching the pattern. The second thing: listen patiently. Parents who cannot control their emotions and beat and scold their children are often because their children\’s performance is not satisfactory. But many times parents only look at a problem from their own perspective and do not understand their children\’s hearts. Therefore, beating and scolding seems to be effective and has certain educational significance, but it cannot really solve the problem. The child\’s apparent obedience is just surrendering to the majesty of his parents. To truly get into their children\’s hearts, parents must learn to listen after calming down and give their children a chance to express their inner thoughts. Children\’s true thoughts are important, and this is the key for subsequent parents to help their children change. The third thing: timely help. After understanding the child\’s inner thoughts, parents must provide timely help to the child on this matter, so that the child can truly realize his mistakes and make changes in time. Beating and scolding can only make children succumb to authority, but cannot have real educational significance. Parents\’ listening and helping are the key to changes in children. From the child\’s expression, parents can understand the child\’s heart, understand which of his thoughts are incorrect and immature, and point them out in a timely manner to help the child change. Conclusion There are no perfect children and no perfect parents. When parents ask their children to change, they must also put down their \”arrogance\” and learn to change themselves. When parents\’ emotions are stable, their children will be able to calm down and cope better when facing strong winds and waves in the future. Parents, when you lose control of your emotions and want to beat or scold your children, try to calm down, and you will find a better way to educate them.